Show The thc Sure Thing Crook AND The T Town wn of I Copyrighted 1901 by b Robert Howard Russell Once there thOre th re was a Grafter who would do anything for Money except WorkS Work He had acted ar w a Capper and for all sorts of Shady Enterprises and a d dhe he had helped to operate every eve variety of SKin Gume Gome on ou the Farmers who came out of ot the Union Station carrying Telescope Valises and Shoe Boxes Boxe full of Lunch He had given Ute the And nd the tho neat Double Cross and the quick to Cattlemen who hang bang around and invite ImIte Trouble Truble after jJ r they the have bave drawn their toey y He Je stood n with the Police Pollee t nd knew an and the Law baa haa ha no Ter Tar Terrors I for him himIn k In Tact fact the Grafter thought he was wa war r one of if the Brightest and Best When the he Fish were running and the Nets came rame up heavy heaT he would wear ear a large lar c IStone in front and a with a Gold Label LabOI Lab l on it and feel sorry for lor the Tads Ta s that were putting down clown the Cedar Blocks for a Day DayOn DayOn On One Spring there th re wee was an Election EIe coming and the Reform Element had to be soothed and jollied so the Au Authorities Authorities suddenly discovered that the Town was Bad nd md closed everything tighter than a n Drum The rhe Pool Rooms Poker po ker Joints Brace irace Fat Fart Fa Games Pol PolIcy POlIcy Policy I Icy Shops Op um Dens Trap Crap rap Parlors j end and in fact act nearly all the Snorting j Li LiL L I Centers except the Stock Exchange put up the Green Shutters and went out of Business until the periodical Spasm Sp sm had played Itself out The Po Police Police lice Bce were so Vigilant that anyone who dropped a Penny in the Slot to get a astick astick astick stick of Wintergreen Gum was taking his life Ute in his Hands During this Season of Depression the th accomplished City Grafter decided that he would go out among the Jays try t to scare up two or three Green Wrappers for his rapidly diminishing Roll RoU He hay hai a Scheme for coaxing Money out of those who want to get Some thing for Nothing and think they are Cute enough to beat the Sharper at his own Tricks His Lay La was to sell 18 Carat Jewelry and Alaska Diamonds at a Nominal Price In order to intro duce du e the Goods and then put Real Money one In the Boxes as an Extra In One corner of ot the Green back was allowed to Protrude as an Evidence of Good Goad Faith yet it may be unnecessary to add adl that no one but the Booster ever pot got ot a Cash Prize The Grafter had a Satchel filled with Tin Jewelry and an Alaska DIamonds Just received from the Glass Works when hen he descended on a 2 Flag Station called which is near the Oll Place in Pike County It Itts w aa ts j of ot these To T ns that seemed t tt be b trying tr to hold two Farms apart When are Ware passing it on oa a Train 1 d j s I 1 ac r rC C I i iI I Zt aJ LI I L I Z The Grafter The Judge f The Marshal i it Leaves Off and you are cut out in inthe Inthe the Country C again before you have time to ask the Name It looked looke very v ry to t the well dressed Shark SI ark from the Hie City and he hoped to do tb o well lyell He stood up on a aDry aDry aDry Dry Goods Good Box x at a Cor Corner Corner ner and maM a Call and began to He V away a Friendship ship rings in order to whet the Interest Just as he was vas elucidating his Un Unselfish I selfish Motives for the benefit of the tl e I Male Residents who were looking up J I at him with their Mouths open oren the Town Marshal came racking down the middle of the Street with A ap piece ece of Sapling in one Hand and a aTin Cm Star Stab on his Coat The Marshal Marshai nee ne ded Money that Dy y He drew a Salary every Month I but it was so Small that If it had been I paid to him In Pig Iron he could have carried it home all right But he got hiS 5 It every very e time he Pinched Pinc anyone ne neso 50 sq ha he had to Arrest somebody about so s often in order to hove hav h Ve enough for or Groceries and Fuel This official By George Author of f Fables in Siang I I did not find it advisable to put his into the Cooler because he was around every Year asking them to vote for him But if a Hired Hand came in and accumulated a or If Ifan any an Stranger began to act New along Main street he was Jerked Up in less than no Time And one of them Thim b Ringers from the City was justly regarded as Meat So the Representative of the Dignity and Majesty M jesty of the Law broke through the Crowd and introduced himself If you are the Town Marshal as an you say I will ask you to remain here while I am giving my Lecture and Free Entertainment and If any anyone one makes any Trouble you arrest him quote the diplomatic Grafter who thought that a Calm Bluff would smooth everything But the Town Marshal was not to tobe tobe tobe be Waved aside He said he wanted 52 2 for a License Fee right away or he would put the Grafter Graft Into the Hen HenHouse HenHouse House Hous so quick make his Head swim So the Grafter gave up Two and started in into to mix up tip the Lit Little Littie tle tie Boxes and the Town Marshal ar arrested arrested arrested rested him for Swindling and led him over to the The next thing to todo t do was w to send for forthe forthe forthe the Squire He was Was out trimming a Hedge but en he heard that there was some Easy Ea Money down town tonn he put Black Bla k Coat and got out his Revised Statutes The Squire and the Town Marshal backed the Grafter up into one Corner of the and made him stand for a Search They found nearly 80 SO on him so they ad advised advised advised him to get a Lawyer and told him they would do the Fair ThIngS ThIng by him and give him a Jury Trial They had a good deal of Local Pride and were down on all Confidence Games so they did not want to see any of or that Money Maney taken out of ot Town Towns The Marshal happened to have 12 Personal Friends who had not seen baen en Working much for a n number of t f Years so he went over to the General Genera Store where they were wont to tOo Congregate and Criticise the Government and summoned them to serve as Jurors Jurs He told them it would not take long lonar because beca se the man was wa Guilty At the Trial the Prosecutor made a apathetic apathetic apathetic pathetic Spell about the Honest La Laboring Laboring Laboring boring Man who is done out ou of his Money by Designing who live In the City The Peers who were try ing lug the Case shifted their Cuds and looked Serious The Attorney for the Defendant collected his Fee in Ad Advance Adan vance vanze an e and then advised his Client to Plead Guilty When the Evidence was in in the Squire gave the Twelve Good Go d Men aad and True a few Instructions He H said aid if tf they found the Defendant Guilty they th I |