Show PMIA SMIGGINS c Is Again to the Front With a Batch of Complaints Editors Herald I When 1 last visited your beautiful beauti-ful and farfamed city I had the I privilege of jour caumns to express ex-press my views on the subject of dancing parlies which callea forth some retaliating remarks from a young mall whose kangaroo movements move-ments short coat and tight pantaloons panta-loons had rendered him a butt for ridicule J am not here in the capacity capa-city of a reformer however as I understand you have had several here of that class whose influence on society has not been quite up to standard rates so 1 do not thirst for notoriety in that direction But I generally keep at least one eye open as I travel around and if by a judicious judi-cious application of the pin of sarcasm sar-casm i can puncture a folly or by a kindly jest I can cure a foible I take delight in using thoseacknow ledged weapons of social warfare and thus supplying a moral lesson and a newspaper article at the same time Whether my yound friend of dancingdude proclivities will take up the journalistic cudgel and figuratively figur-atively waltz into print again of course I am not prepared to say but he can depend on itf if he does I shall be on hand to waid off the blow and give his Dudical Highness something to do for his money I see that you western people are still under the necessity of participating partici-pating in certain religious or irreligious irre-ligious rites whether you sympathize sympa-thize or not I refer to the daily sacrifices offered up on the altar of a vicious appetite by the lovers of tobacco 1 do not wish to infer that we are free from it in the east for I presume we have everything you have that is bad although we sometimes some-times vary the names a little But I was surprised to find young men and even little boys smoking cigars and cigarettes on your street cars I rode on one the other daya car 1 mean One young fellow with avery a-very white lace and a very red necktie was jeopardizing his prospective pros-pective mustache by sucking a brief stump of what smelted to me like a decaying vegetable True the close proximity of the fire of the cigar to the head of the youth may have caused the odor of scorched cabbage to fill the car but I imputed the odoriferous fragrance of which 1 was the involuntary inhaler in-haler for about ten blocks to the ingredients of the stump which seemed to be so much relished by the lips that held it in an affectionate affection-ate embrace and which had become be-come livid through licking the tawny sweetmeat Why do the drivers permit such a nuisance I inquired of a gentleman gen-tleman who stood near me for I perceive that only ladies sit in j jour street cars and manage to occupy all the seats pretty well too Why do they allow smoking on your cars carsOh he replied 1tis only allowed al-lowed ou the phIora Yes but said I the doors are I frequently opened lo admit and unload un-load passengers and besides the smoke finds its way through the joints and cracks in the doorways I door-ways and becomes very unpleasant I and unwholesome too I should think thinkWell II Well said the gentleman hit is one of the things we have to put up I with rather than appear exacting and become obnoxious Now theres the small boy nuisance These little fellows will climb on the hind end of the car in swarms they pay no fare smear up the railing with their dirty sticky hands stare at the passengers cheek those who interfere in-terfere with them and a lady can scarcely squeeze through the motley crowd when she desires to alight No one complains openly because whats everybodys business is nobody no-body and as we live here the nuisance nuis-ance continues unabated ratber than to cause offense But why do mt the drivers and I officials see to it 1 It would not be allowed in thickly populated cities where it would be more excusable Well I dont know unless it is that no one brings it to their notice If thats the case said I they will soon hear of itt for I will refer to it in one or my communications and as 1 dont live here they wont get offended at me Snce the above conversation I I have been thinking We blame the I gentlemen for eeliishness but after all we excel them in this vice of morality Why is it that a gentleman gentle-man and especially if he be a1 workingman can never or seldom sit down in a street car when there are a few ladies on the seat I have seen three gentlemen riFe to give a lady a seat but if a gentleman enters en-ters the car although the car maybe may-be only partially filled with ladies no one moves to the right or left to accommodate the new arrival We often hear of the maxim When one lady rises two gentlemen gentle-men sit down but we never see such a thing because the lady never rises and the gentlemen never sit downin a street car I have thought that a lady might at least have her children stand to make room for a passenger even if that passenger was a gentleman But sometimes a mother and her lovely family will occupy a whole tier of seats and a row of gentlemen stand and look on with haggard countenances counten-ances When the conductor co ies in he conscientiously collects a fare from each standing gent while the lady conscientiously pays one fare tor her entire family In some places east no one Js allowed to stand and the condactor invariably invaria-bly sees that each person pays who occupies a seat whether chill or adult Your conducors may be more modest than ours but the order to close up would soon be given among us if we were to spread our skirts and try to look pretty while tired men stood and looked on As the car was drawn alo g 1 By he mules which looked si < f nAnd n-And all the seats feemed full of puEsea gsrs A poor old tired chap Who hung upon a trap Thus delivered himsel tj All the hims and her i My ladies fair and gay I have labored all tne riy Until my bones and muscles sorely ac le Wbile you have jaunted out Or idly sat abou Endeavoring your quet eae to taks The gentlemen 1 see From censure here are free For none of them do ocupy a seat But 0 ye ladies fair Who are a sittin there Woud one of ye just eland upon your feet At this a lady rose As you may well suppose To let the poor old gentleman sit down When to my great surprise No one did need to rise For all could sit wbo had been standing round Yours for rest and fresh air PMrA SiiieGINS |