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Show un v iu ii Students add flare to writing ! f; Next, Andrea met with three other English students. They read Andrea A. Speran-z- a each composition, looking for good LAYTON is a sophomore English student. points and weaknesses. Andrea said this was very helpful . Her peer The following example of her writing shows the steps she used to evaluators felt the opening paragraph didnt fit the style of the rest improve her first writing lab assignment. The topics was to write abof the story. She made changes based on this criticism. out a school experience. The revised draft was typed into The following first paragraph of Andreas rough draft was typed the computer. This is the result: into the computer: The annual taThe annual talent show, at lent show, at Wasatch Elementary Wasatch Elementary School, was School, in which any students who about to begin and the staiT was wished to participate were wel- asking all the students to take part. come, was just around the corner. It was pitiful the way they almost Me and my good friend Aimee, afpleaded for the support. My friend ter some discussion, decided to enAimee, and I decided to take pity on the staff and enter with a short ter with a short dance. Andreas original composition dance." was basically good. The writing lab The composition, with assistprogram helped her replace to ance from the writing lab, flowed be verbs with action ones. It also soothly from an interesting openimproved some grammer, puncing to a surprise conclusion. The tuation and structural errors. final draft turned out to be nearly By DONETA GATHERUM . double the length of the original. Ideas were expanded and more material was incorporated into the final paper. Compare the rough draft conclusion with the revised ending. After a few dance steps I started to feel better when, of all things, I felt my nylons gathering at my ankles and I looked down to see the white part of them sticking out of the bot-- ; tom of my leotard. I could have died on the spot! The final draft left this paragraph nearly intact. It added this improved conclusion, I could hear the laughter in the audience but 1 was too afraid to look down. I ran to the bathroom with tears running down my face only to find, later that day, that a bunch of sixth grad- ' : I ;; : ' ers, including my brother, had taken first prize with a skit they had made just the week before. Layton High School English teachers demonstrate to student how use of computer word processing system can improve writing skills. Writing skills strengthened through new LHS laboratory By DONETA GATHERUM LAYTON Layton High Schools English teachers believe they have found a way to get students to revise and improve their writing assignments. The English department has in- vested their annual advanced placement budget plus other moneys contributed by other AP departments and other school funds, to purchase 15 Apple II computers, Apple Works wordprocessing systems and a Writer's Helper supplement program by William Wresch of the Universtiy of Wisconsin. A special writing lab has been developed and is being used this spring on an experimental basis. The English teachers have also invested time. They have attended a series of workshops to train them in computer use and the wordprocessing writing techniques. Now the English teachers are working on a minimum of four standardized writing assignments that will be used next year at the rate of at least one per quarter for all English students in the sopho-mor-d and junior classes. A special manual with specific lessons developed by the Logan School District is the model the make the needed revisions by pushing appropriate keys. No writing is necessary. The actual print out is done only when the student is satisfied that the revision is complete. The final revision uses the Writers Helper developed by William Wresch. Some of the things this computer program can do include organizing words in a sentence, judging style, transition and logic, checking for homonyms, to be verbs, usage errors and giving the students an indication of the grade level they are writing on. The Writers Helper can also assist with earlier steps in the composition process. This program helps students find a subject by giving lists, crazy contrasts and brainstorming ideas. It can help students teachers are using to develop their assignments. Pat Stoddart from Logan acquainted the Layton teachers with this processed writer program at a special workshop session. The writing lab has a format. First students are given a assignment by the teacher. This is a motivational step that presents ideas from the teacher and other students to get the composition started. Next the student develops a rough draft. This is placed on a computer disc. Peer response is an important part of the writing lab process. Each student composition is read by a group of several other students. Appropriate comments are made by the students. Student revision comes next. Traditionally, this is the most difficult part of a writing assignment because it involves writing, changStudents are reing and luctant to spend the time needed to carefully improve a rough draft. Often they say they are satisfied with their first efforts because they dont want to be bothered with the extra work requires. well-organiz- pre-writi- organize information by grouping thoughts and outlining. When the final print out is completed, the student has a composition of high quality. Teachers are pleased because the final product they grade is relatively error free. This saves time and rewards the students with better grades, more praise from the teacher and more confidence in their writing skills. District English Supervisor, Di?T Don Lockhead, notes the writing lab seems to help students most; who have difficulty writing very much substance in a composition. By using the computer to analyze a Computers make this task easier.' In fact, many students enjoy this process. They can see their mistakes quickly on the screen and Jackson gets scholarship e simple, almost paper, a student who writes little can easily add substance to weakly expressed thoughts. A trained person needs to be with the lab while students are using the equipment. Should an aide be hired? Should the use of the writing lab be limited to English students only or should other departments be allowed to benefit from the investment in equipment and training? These problems seem minor when they are compared to the value of a writing program that has the potential of turning an ordinary, routine, boring English assignment into a learning adventure. BYU. He plans to attend the University of Utah. Travis is an honor student at has been awarded the prestiDavis W.C. High School where he is capBrowning Scholarship gious tain of the track team, starter on from the University of Utah Mining Engineering Department. Very the football team and member of few freshmen are given the honor the National Honor Society. He is of receiving this cash stipend of listed in Whos Who of American $1830 per year. He was honored High School students and is a NaMay 21 at a banquet and awards tional Achievement Academy winnight at the U of U Alumni House ner. He has also received numerous awards for science projects on campus. achievements. Travis, a senior at Davis High and He is an Eagle Scout and a Priest School, was also the recipient of an in the Kaysville 14th Ward where Honors at Entrance and Leaderserves as first counselor in the he U. at the of U. ship scholarships and a presidential scholarship at Priests quorum. of Kaysvil-l- e, 4-- H Use your low interest home equity loan for a car or for other worthwhile purchases Sego Lily DUP meets Sego Lily Camp Daughters of Utah Pioneers held the last meeting of the year on May 1 1 at the home of Ruth B. Estep in Clinton. Capt. Delaine W. Hansen conducted the meeting. An interesting history of her grandfather, Daniel Wood, was given by Susan W. Nelson. Eldeen B. Barnes gave the lesson on "Early Utah Forts. Luncheon was served to 11 ladies by Mrs. Estep, her daughter, Peggy Sheen and Edris W. Child. Better selection Better. interest Better terms Colateral is in the house not the car or other items And Possibly a better income tax advantage on the interest you pay Bountiful 2921416 Mens Canvas Shoe S-zQ-ZL- -ZE Every mens canvas or mesh shoe Every color in stock - tie, or slip-o- n KEDS HUSH PUPPIES NUNN BUSH BASS Be Cool and Comfortable This Summer Quilt will preserve memories KAYSVILLE Many years hence, a fortunate Davis High School senior will reminisce of those brief, yet memory-fille- d high school days thanks to a quilt. Its a tradition to present a gold and brown quilt to a senior the night of the senior party. It represents the clubs and class officers Family Shoes 43 No. Main Downtown Bountiful Janice Barnes. According to PTA Olivia King, a senior bash at the Weber State Union Building will , celebrate this CtiGti CALL BEFORE YOU DIG. Something as simple as that little lawn project could turn out to be a real problem for you and your neighborhood. 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The contributions culminate in a quilt through the efforts of single-sentenc- Travis Jackson, son of Mr. and Mrs. Stephen Jackson Davis High School PTSA Olivia King and son Jeremy shows off the quilt of 1984-8- 7 memories to be awarded to a graduating senior. full Answers: years graduating class and the presentation of the ' quilt. The evening will also spot-:- : light many seniors and events from the past nine months. Tickets are being sold by PTA volunteers and parents are wel- - ? come to the party. All proceeds" from the quilt and party go to the PTSA scholarship fund |