Long Hair Life Plight of the Penguin By ANDY LOPEZ Strolling through the park one day in the merry, merry month of May, Homer H. Landing got punched in the nose by George Armstrong Arm-strong Custer. The former had whis tled at the latter. It really wasn't Homer's fault. All he saw from the back was cute, curly, blond hair. "Is it a boy or a girl?" is the question that has puzzled men since B. B. (before barbers) through the days of Samson, through the days of Washington, through the days of the Liverpool Four. Not tile Only Ones Those bothered by this question however, may take comfort in the plight of the penguin. It is absolutely absolut-ely impossible for science to tell the gender of a penguin without dissecting it. Science can take comfort com-fort in the fact that penguins can't tell the difference either. Where do little penguins come from? It should be mentioned that each individual penguin knows its own sex, this is helpful. A male, acting on instinct, picks up a pebble in his mouth, approaches another penguin pen-guin and drops the pebble in front of "it." Sex Education Needed Now, one of three things can happen. First, "it" quite often will be a male penguin. In this instance the accosted male would follow the example ex-ample set by George Armstrong Custer in the merry month of May. The pebble dropping penguin would then go look for some ice. Not a hard thing to find in his area. Second, "it" might be a female who is displeased with the fresh penguin's physique, attire or line. She would then follow the example ts'et by the "laughing lady." The pebble dropping penguin would try to hide his head, take the abuse and then saunter off. Third, love at first sight -might result and thus little penguins. "Is it a boy or is it a girl?" Pick up a pebble and see.