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Show A Year of Change o o 5 ;4 Our story begins a long time ago in a room far, far away. Forces for good and evil are battling one with another to get the job done. Scarcely do people realize the amount of work that goes into the production of a student newspaper such as the Signpost. This year as managing editor, I have come to know exactly how much work is involved and what kind of crazy people are willing to do it. After all, only a "committed" person could work for three straight 12-hour days at something that they weren't being paid by the hour to do. These are people like Dave Allison, alias "droll wit." Droll is defined as queer, and fitted to provoke laughter; amusing and strange; a wag; a jester; a buffoon. Dave is definitely our resident buffoon. He jumped out from behind a door to yell surprise, accidentally slit his wrist, and put his dirty dishes in Tanya Schaffer's desk. And that all happened in one day! Tanya, alias "bag lady," is nicknamed that because she carries a huge purse with everything in it. One day I saw her wearing three different outfits and they weren't even wrinkled! Could it be? Does she carry an iron, too? Wrinkles were never a bother for Charles Kasten, alias the "trash can" cartoonist. While Charles works with diligence to draw the perfect cartoon, these works of art aren't always appreciated. One political candidate's cohorts saw his drawing, swiped it, and threw it in the nearest trash can. This was a job for Emilie Bean, alias "Scarlet letter." The S is for scandal. Emilie enjoys digging up any secrets that lie untold at Weber State College. When Emilie found the cartoon was missing, she set her nose to the scent of stolen funnies. Moments later, the cartoon was found in a garbage can. How did she know it was there? T . - - '4 J. 1 ,., V f A 1 f 1 Weber J 1; 1 1 t, : "J I - I - .t "' m' ' . .. :4k. ' f . . .-. .- v ..-. - . Emilie created her own scandal last quarter when she went into the dark room with Mark Plumley, alias "the red light romeo." No one knows exactly what happened in the room. But the facts are that strange noises were heard, and that Emilie turned three colors when asked what they were. Emilie refuses to go into the dark room with Mark anymore. But one woman doesn't. Alisa Buck, alias "wonder woman," has been seen entering the dark room with Mark on several occasions. She was nicknamed wonder woman because of her ability to come out of the situation alive. Last time, I saw her leave wearing a smile. Smiles, smiles, smiles. Everyone smiles to keep each other happy during late hours at the Signpost. Especially Sheila Christianson, alias "the public relations specialist." She laughs at everyone's jokes, even Chris Miller's, alias "reformed male chauvinist." Don't get me wrong, Chris' jokes really aren't that bad. It's just that some of us no longer care how many women it takes to screw in a light bulb. What is funny about that, I don't know. Neither does Kristen "spacey lady" Olsen know, nor does she care. They say she was given the nickname for her ability to design the space on a page, a task she completes quite well. However, some of us wonder if that is the real reason why. Donna Brown, alias "lost and found," knew for sure once but she forgot. Jeff Bybee, alias "old faithful," said he'd find out once and he is still asking questions. Christopher Gamble, alias "nervous nellie after 5," said it would be too nerveracking to find out. He gets nervous when he is getting close to deadline with his articles. He is said to have been seen with his hair standing on end. This sounds like a job for Michael Buck, alias "cosmetology specialist." The fact that he was given this nickname for his ability to sell cosmetology ads makes him the only one at the paper who knows anything about hair. Well, except for John Kraczek, alias " knife specialist." He knows how to cut it know about you, but I wouldn't want my with-an exacto knife. 1 1 IOC SignOff Tuesday, June 2, 1987 |