Show Life is Hard by Katherine Hamlin Elevators A boon to An easy way to togo togo togo go up without stressful move movement ment and an easy way to go down without stressful movement Elevators teach us pa pa- tience Time and again Ive I've decided to wait for the elevator instead of laboring laboring laboring labor labor- ing up a flight of steps Push the button the green greenup greenup greenup up arrow illuminates You wait the elevator is only two flights up You still wait Ah one flight away Did someone once say Time is money Could it be stuck between floors No the green up arrow goes out The door opens No room Could there really be 40 people in that little elevator Well the stairway stairway stairway stair stair- way couldn't be crowded- crowded all the people are in the elevator Our elevators at are programmed to promote promote promote pro pro- mote the school Once in ina ina ina a great while I get the op opportunity to ride the elevator elevator elevator eleva eleva- tor alone I catch the lift liftin in the basement and and punch flo floor r 4 Up I go to the second floor Stop The doors open but no noone noone noone one is there Finally the Continued on page 3 t C Continued e page 2 fourth floor Stop Im I'm tempted to see if I stay in inthe inthe inthe the elevator will I go to the fifth floor Hoor and get a peek at it After all a scenic tour of the Rampton Building includes the tte fifth floor Last but not least the energy we conserve riding the elevator can be applied applied applied ap ap- ap- ap plied towards schoolwork those stairs can surely kill a person Its It's much better to take the elevator Here Herel I I am in the basement again heading for forthe the fourth floor Great Only two other students Oh were we're stopping at the second floor Hey this elevator can only hold 2400 Ibs lbs That's my foot A briefcase to the ribs I wonder how many people use deodorant There are disadvantages to being short Weve We've ar arrived arrived arrived ar- ar rived at the third floor Surely some of these people people people peo peo- will disembark No Well one more floor and Im I'm safe I hope that creaking noise is nothing to worry about Ah the fourth floor Excuse me EXCUSE ME Hey let me out Dont Don't let the doors close closel Oh crap Everyone Everyone Everyone Ever Ever- yone but little ol of me gets getsoff getsoff getsoff off on the fifth floor I collapse collapse collapse col col- col- col lapse at the sudden space and oxygen available Oh no I forgot to push the 4 button Im I'm sinking a ag down to the bowels bowes of this HI ls 1 w |