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Show Kathleen Morris Says: j Daughters Give Hints to Mothers ( Bell Syndicate.-WNU Features I Nothing U mort embarrassing to a girl, who takes her friend-thips friend-thips seriously, than to have her mother all coyness, effusion and playful hints. By KATHLEEN NORRIS IN PORTLAND, ORE., a few weeks ago, some high school girls formulated six rules for their mothers. This turning of the tables was regarded as highly amusing and endearingly endearing-ly saucy at first, but in the end the mothers had to confess that the hints for their behavior be-havior were helpful and probably prob-ably will lead to a better understanding un-derstanding between these particular par-ticular mothers and girls. Any such understanding tightens home ties, equalizes the levels of the two generations and has a good effect for all time. So my congratulations congratu-lations to the girls of Portland's Lincoln high school. These, briefly, are the rules for mothers: They must give up their gushy manners when meeting the girls' new friends. They must take telephone messages more respectfully respect-fully and never eavesdrop. They must avoid partiality toward other members of the family, especially younger brothers. They must refrain from excessive demonstrations of affection af-fection in public and from praise that is Intended only to build up a ompetitive spirit And lastly, they must not attempt to use current -slang. All these seem to mc to be good suggestions. Nothing Is more embarrassing em-barrassing to a girl, who takes her friendships seriously, than to have her mother all coyness, effusion and playful hints. This is one way to destroy the daughter's Initiative in making new friends and create in her a shyness and awkwardness, awkward-ness, she didn't start with. The rule for the telephone mes- cages and the eavesdropping ought to hold good for everyone, young nd old. Praising one girl in the hope of improving another Is an annoying custom, if only because the listener sees through it and is bored by It to the depth of her being. "Jean has such lovely manners," says Mother slyly. "Dear me, only 15 five months older than you are, darling, and such composure and such lovely manners!" Mother Irks Daughter Phyllis, listening, can hardly keep from shouting, "Oh, shut up!" Mother's praise of her schoolmate isn't going to improve her manners; the careful example Mother sets her will not have much effect But let Phyllis' aunt from New York or some movie queen assume that nice-ness nice-ness of action and speech, that consideration con-sideration and gentleness which we call nice manners and Phyllis is suddenly a transformed girl, while Mother complacently observes that at last her admonitions are having some effect As for public demonstrations of affection, "and showing baby pictures," pic-tures," these are among the Uiou-sand Uiou-sand things that embarrass girls because be-cause they make them conspicuous. To direct attention to the young is to destroy their own desperate efforts ef-forts to be like the herd, to be just one of the group. But don't be deceived by this par-ticvlar par-ticvlar rule. Girls love real affec- UNDERSTANDING Ordinarily parents regard the opinions of tlieir teen-aged teen-aged children impassively. They listen vMh mock seriousness ser-iousness while the youngsters young-sters attempt to explain their viewpoints and oftentimes often-times dismiss their ideas as childish, immature prattle. Successful, understand ing parents learn by listening. A -group of high school girls, who had been on the receiving end of helpful advice, ad-vice, turned the tables and offered their mothers some I valuable hints regarding their beJiaviour. tion from their own people and love to know that they were adored as babies. Only they don't want the playful, the exaggerated, the affected displays of teasing devotion that some mothers seem to feel Is the way to treat them in public. Of all qualities, young sons and daughters most appreciate sincerity sincer-ity real political talk from Dad, real sensible cooperation from Mother. Some fathers never speak to their growing children except teasingly and youth suffers cruelly cruel-ly under teasing while some mothers reserve baby talk until they meet their daughter and group of her friends. Even worse, and completely inexcusable, in-excusable, is the delusion of Mother and Dad that they can chatter in that strange and changeable language, lan-guage, current school slang. Nothing is more evasive, more subtle, more delicately graded than this argot and to hear it used or applied incorrectly in-correctly causes the most acute anguish an-guish to the young souL Anybody's mother is stamped at once as an absolute idiot as she light-heartedly i babbles a tongue with which she is entirely unfamiliar. Favoritism Is Unwise As for the remaining rule, it is sad to find it among these seriocomic serio-comic ones, for it is far more basic and far less easily corrected. To feel that there is favoritism at home Is to have your young philosophy upset in a way from which it never may recover. Too many mothers adore and spoil the boy, shelter him from his father's criticism and save him from the results of his own mistakes, while maintaining all the while an extremely severe attitude toward the girls. This has a doubly bad effect it weakens the boy and it causes his sisters to like him less than they otherwise would. Also, It causes the girls to dislike and resent re-sent their mother. It is only fair to remind these mothers who worship their sons that their real satisfaction, in later year3, will come from the daughters. The daughters will bring life into the house; the son will go elsewhere to find his girL Mother always will be welcome in the daughters' homes but not in that of the son, except in rare cases. Justice and affection for the girls now, and even a little extra spoiling, is a good investment. Boys Set Example LAKIN, KAS. La kin boys think that Lakin girls are the prettiest in the Southwest The boys got tired of seeing the girls come to school in blue jeans. In the local high school they organized a "blue nose club" among 1 the boys with 100 per cent mem-I mem-I bership to outlaw sloppy attir-?. ; Then they want to school in their ! Sunday best. j The girls looked vorso thar I ever. They took the h.ni. Th ton will go elsewher . i . |
