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Show JUST FOR FUN DPdn't Like the Siit. "Sir," said the young man as ho entered en-tered the library for tho purposo of interviewing tho father of the only girl, 'T am in love with your daughter. Have you any objections to my suit?" The old man looked the y. m. over from head to foot. "I sure have," he replied. "Why, I wouldn't wear a misfit suit like that to a dog fight. Why don't you try some other tailor?" Chicago News. How It Was Managed. Beers How did you manage to make Toner' quit using his phonograph? phono-graph? Townsend By expressing our admiration ad-miration for it Just as soon as the machine was heard all the men. women wom-en and children of the neighborhood made a bee-line for Toner's house, made themselves at home and vociferously vocifer-ously applauded every selection. Why, Toner wouldn't start that machine ma-chine now for $100. Chicago News. Another Fault Found. Mr. Rcccntmarrie This cake is good dear, but there seem to be a good many egg shells in It. Mrs. Kecentmarrie I'm sorry, John, but I used only three shells, the number tho recipe calls for. Mr. Recentmarrie Tho number the recipe calls for? Mrs. Recentmarrie Yes, John, tho recipe says to use the "whites of three eggs." Exchange. Letting Off. "Do you see that fellow over there yelling 'Kill the umpire!' 'Cut his heart out! and 'The bloody robber?'" i ' Of course 1 see him and hear him, I too." "Well, he's one of the worst henpecked hen-pecked men In town. He comes out here every afternoon to let off steam." Birmingham Age-Herald. A Smart Boy. After explaining the meaulng of the fateful words, "Sic semper lyrannis," uttered by John Wilkes Booth, a tr-acher in 'an Arizona town asked If anv pupil could repeat them. ''I can." attested a youthful desert product, with positive assurance. "Six ccntlpodes and a tarantula!" Judge. Two Kinds of Fame. "Yes," admitted the author of a successful suc-cessful book, "I woke up one morning and found myself famous." "It was different with me," remarked re-marked the politician who had made an Ill-advised speech. "One morning I found myself famous then I woke up." Chicago News. Didn't Propose to Hurry. His Wife I just can't bear to see you smoking, John. The doctor says I It is slow poison. Her Husband Well, I'm not going to Like quick poison just to pleaso you and tho doctor. Chicago News. |