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Show II Dorothy Dix Talks DOES LOVE COME AFTER MARRIAGE? jj By DOROTHY DIX, the World's Highest Paid Woman Writer. j; A correspondent asks this question. -1)009 ihc marriage of convenience q often turn into a love match? In other t words, is the man or woman who mar- ned without love apt to fall in love 0 v. i : Ij his wife or her husband?" To this question I should answer both yes and no. The marriage nf , , om'-ni'-nce seems to work very well 1 in Europe, where the Rood of the family fam-ily la more considered than that of the individual, and where sentiment appears to cut a smaller figure in people's peo-ple's lives than material prosperity does. However, in this land of the . free and the home of the sentimentalist, sentimental-ist, where we are all individualists and intent on our individual happiness, the marriage of convenience nearly always al-ways turns out to be one of the In? J convenient marriages that ends in the divorce court nw On the face of it it is obvious that marriage can be no promoter of ro-mance, ro-mance, because romance depends largely upon illusion, and matrimony is a state of disillusion. When two people who have been 1 ( horn and reared in a different rnviron-W rnviron-W C ment. with different tastes, habits and a points of view, undertake io live to-f to-f r gether, their opposite- opinions and dp JIIjL aires are bound to clash One or the ' HJ other is bound to give up the little ways that are so dear to us all. and lbs on'v 'ovc ena--es us to De willing to do this, and keeps us from hating the person for whom we are martyrized Also in the fierce light that beats 1 u' upon 'In'' tannl. circle, men and WO- men see each other with all the cam-ouflace cam-ouflace off. It is only in poetry that beauty unadornpd is the rant adorned, Krul ant " ' "" rnrourapr "f sentlmenl ( wJJ j 111 a m',n'; hre;ist !"r h' to see all ikku i ' wlfH si' k ' "'' anc nerve -wracked, iJ'Jf. with ii'-r h.Mr up m crimpere and her complexion washed off. and a floppy wrapper instead of pink chiffon m-SM m-SM veloping her f iu r- P?1 " NhiiIht is i in rf anv thins In allure a woman's funcv when she beholds her husband with a throp days stubble of beard on his face, swearing a blup streak because dinner is five minutes late, or grouchv because something has u gone wrong at the office nBj No. Matrimony is not the orad' of l iL lov.- 1 1 i- ill,- in t;. furnace in which blove is tried out and in which all ai TR fi-cnon lh:ii i- n'i p:r -,,(J i - burn.-, I J up rniu .1-1;--. Tins being the case it is a hazardous experiment for peo-luj, peo-luj, Iff pl i'H'-iiipi the holy estate on the iL . . off chance thai they will fall m love J Urtf after marriaSp wi,u the individual who M Wli riif noi inspin love in i heir breasts YfJW before marriage. in sucn rases, mey are rar more apt 1 XOW to learn m hate the one (o whom thej fg f are hound than they are to love him m Still, the day of miracles is never past Sometimes Cupid docs visit the loveless household, but when be does knock at the door it is almost invar iably (he woman and not the man on bwhom he calls Sometimes a woman who has mar-rled mar-rled a man merely because he w;is a h I " - : f ...! he is a good yH many t ha i he is tender -yinpairci ir. generous and kind, and he surrounds her with a chlvalrj that is so beautiful iJM and wonderful that h wins her heart, tenfe' srral majority of women are MCWi ' ah.solut 1 v dependent upon their bus- liBt bands for evfi.vihinK in life The wife depends upon her husband for her physical phy-sical comforts and she has luxuries or hardships according to whether he la prosperous or not, or stingy or not. She depends on her husband lor whatever f pleasure, she has She depends on him for the atmosphere of her home and she lives in crouching terror of , 0 Iji his temper and moods, 01 I: shi Is cherished and flattered like a little irr vvomen realize more acutely lhan men dn what the altitude of a husband towards his wife means (o the wife w how completely her happiness is in his jjfcv. hands, and when one sols a husband dB&l w'nn rorvi'irr ," '" in every wa . and rWl Vh fr"ar''' un'l protects her and whose affection clothes her as with a fJttt ra(l,arJt garment, she is prettv sure to t r ifall in love with him She can't help herself She does it throuch sheer gratitude and the romance of her luck jin getting such a prize. Practically any woman will fall in love with a man who is good io her, 'and a good husband, but this rule does ' not apply to men and good wives. A man never falls in love with a woman 'because she is good or good to him. and this is because women love men ! for their virtues, and men love wo men lor iln-ir graces Which Is a par 1 adox, considering that women are supposed sup-posed to be the frivilous sex. A woman who Is nm in love with a man when she marries him may fall in love with the man after marriage if he is lovable, because she is always j studying him. but a man retains the impression all of his life that he had of the woman he married because he -never takes the trouble to study her. I If a man marries a girl w ho w eighs ninety pounds he will still call her 'Kitten'' or "Baby" or "Little Girl" even after she gels to have the figure of a feather bed and weighs a ton. If he married a woman with whom he ; was fascinated, hi1 is apt to still stay fascinated even after her wand is I broken and her magic spilled. And likewise, if he married a woman who had no charm for him. excepl that of money or convenience, not once in a million limes will he see her in any (other light than that of a household I necessity. Besides which all ht the circumstances circumstan-ces of a woman's life draws her to- wards her husband while the conditions condi-tions of a man s life sepal itea him from his wife And thai is why it is I that a woman often falls in love with hoj- husband, but a husband rarely falls in love with his wife i |