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Show I I OUR MTJ)GET 01? FUN. i SOME OOOD JOKES, OnlQINAL AND SELECTED. A Vsrtely of Jaket OlbM nnt Ir.l. (irltlDt ml nelectel riaum oJ J,l.m fro Hit tile ot llauiot Will ttflnxt. , lino til Irmf II.II'M. Jim was broke However, be managed man-aged to reach Vaneouicr, nnd, walking walk-ing Into the headqusrters office ot the Canadian Pacific, said to the manager In charge "I am Jim Wardner and I nm an old friend of Tom Hliaughneasy, the general superintendent Will you ' wire him nnd tell hi in that I am here, i broke, nnd want transportation to Montreal" j Hack came the reply "Don't let j Jim walk " He got the transportation, nnd arriving at Montreal called nt . once to thank hi friend "Well, well. Jim, It thl renll) you?" Then, with n twinkle of the c)c "How under the i heaven did you get here to soon It : ou wero brnkoT" "Why, thank to your telegram, 'Don't let Jim walk ' Of course, I wa at once furnished transportation, and here I nm " "Confound those operators! It It ttrango they cannot get m metnagei through correctly'" "Didn't you telegraph 'Don't let Jim Walk?'" Interrupted Wardner. "Certainly not! My answer was: 'Don't! l-t Jim wlkl"-San Pran- ' eltco Wave. ) . ; A lllrfrrrner, I Nurse "Now, Mist i:me, you mutt bo very kind to our sister's llttlo baby M and lovo her very much" nj KirJe (much hurt) "No, I won'L It's 9 too bad, father calls baby hit blcued H grandchild, and only calls me his little M lCrtlc. Why, I'm five times the size ot that mllo!" Judy. M Dew. HIM I In Ihe Ileal. "That naval olllcer thinks he knows W It all, doesn't he?" said tho German R emperor. 9 "III conduct certainly warrant the n suspicion, your mnjetty." J "He's getting haughty nnd Imagines H that ho can havo his own wny when- H over and wherever ho plcates." "It certolnly looks that way." "Well, I don't want to hurt his fed-Ing fed-Ing personally, but we'd better do something to hold down hi otcrbenr-Ing otcrbenr-Ing pride. I guest I'll put him In charge of one of our warship nnd lend him to Manila." Washington Etcnlng Star. ! I'lpltln Willi 31.11,1 ami ( lil.el. l'wcddy Is that our cat. Mitt Qwacle? Hho Yet; wo call blm Iloomerang. Isn't that n funny namo for him? l'wcddy Ye. I law! haw! Kr aw why do jou call him that. Mist Owaclo? Chicago Tribune l .11 Mm Away from lu "At regards thlt matter ot army-beef," army-beef," remarked tbo man with tha I houlder ttrapt, "I consider It a dead I ttsuo." "Hut It Isn't embalmed!" fiercely Interrupted the man from the ttock jardt. Chicago Tribune, ruffiwnrn.il. "When my typewriter girl went fi away what do you think?" Well i what?" "She left a nolo for tho new girl telling her I wat mighty thaky ; on the use of 'shall and 'will'" Chi- ;j cigo Itccord, 'S ; Aft, mi. th. J "You married me for my money." ' "What of It? You married mo for J my beauty." , " "Well, both securities have deprt- ,'m dated." Life, 'J A 1'ropU.t lu III. Own Country. 1 Slyvla "I wonder whether he'll bt fl a toldler or a sailor?" pjrg Mamma "Wouldn't jou like him to ID be an artist, like papa?" E Sylvia "Oh. ono In tho family's i ll qulto enough!" Tlt-lllU. ' M iJS |