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Show jTfST FOR FUN Abstracting the Abstract. Ho was a huge man of tho navy species, and as he stood In the witness wit-ness box counsel eyed him dubiously. dubious-ly. He know he would bo a hard nut to crack a very hard nut, Indeed. In-deed. "What wo want to get at," he began, be-gan, "is who was tho aggressor?" "Eh?" said the witness, puzzled. "Lot me illustrate my meaning," said counsol. "Supposing that I should meet you on the street and strike you on tho faco, I would be tho aggreseor." "You'd be a fool," said tho witness, wit-ness, with growing emphasis. '"No no!" said counsel, with heightening color. "I was spcaklug only In abstract. Suppose wc met, and, without provocation, 1 struck you, I should bo committing an act of aggression." The navvy hunched his huge shouldcis. "You'd bo committing suicide, mister," he remarked grimly. 'You may sit down!" snapped counsel. London Answers. Crucial. Gunner At last the tipping evil 1b getting somewhere within bounds. I heartily Indorse the bravo dinors who only tip 10 p. t. of the bill. Guyer Have you tho courage of your convictions? Guyer Well, go ' in that swell lunch room on the corner, order a 20c lunch and then tip the pretty witross with 2 cents. Chicago Nows. Shocked: Mrs. Bacon I sco It is said that certain species of fish generate measureablc quantities of electricity electric-ity In their bodies. Mr. Bacon Yes. I believe that is bo. Mrs. Bacon Wore you over shocked by a fish you caught, dear? Mr. Bacon No, but I've been shocked by somo of tho fish stories I've heard. Yonkers Statesman. A Belated Story. "This is a good anecdote about George Washington," remarked the editor, "but it seems strange that it has never boon in print hofore." "Not at all," explained the occa-bional occa-bional contributor, "I only thought of it a few days ago." Kansas City Journal. A Wrong Impression. Fair Critic Oh, Mr. Smear, those ostriches over there are simply porfect. You should never paint anything else but "birds. Artist (sadly) Those aro not ostriches, os-triches, madam. Thoy are angels! Loudon Opinion, A Close Shave. "One of these men, a Calabrnin, named Motta, went to his partner's shop and tried to shoot him while ho was engaged In shaving a suc-tomor. suc-tomor. The bullet shaved the faco of a boy who was waiting." Egyptian Egypt-ian Gazette. ' And very likely tho lad had only dropped in for a hair cut. Punch. |