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Show if rhAPhillipr W I. J WNU Sn- THOSE WEEK-END JAIL TERMS "Under a new law the courts m NLXrk state may let serve jail terms on a Partj '",e basis. II the conv.cted man has a job and must serve thirty tog judge may let him serve it weekend week-end or on other specified days. News item.) "When I read items like this in the papers these days I never know j, tn. frm for certain wheth-44fiyj-f ;. r er I am reading rrVLE yf 1 the fanny papers . OSCTKi I j or a report of an ''2-JrJF 1 actual fact," de-eft de-eft I clared Elmer fe VLM Twitchell today. !- 'PTjail "Maybe sentenc- 1 riMftU)K ing men to the hoosegow for breaking the laws and then arranging it so the sentence won't interfere with their lives very much is a swell idea, but it still leaves me dizzy. "I always thought the idea of a jail sentence was to teach a lawbreaker law-breaker a lesson and make him feel crime didn't pay, but if a fellow who cracks a safe, sticks up a bank cashier cash-ier or ambushes a peaceful pedestrian pedes-trian knows that, even if convicted, the jail term won't be much of a hardship, I give up. "The whole theory of punishment used to be that it would at least cause some inconvenience. The authorities used to hold that a term in stir was bound to take an offender of-fender away from his regular pastimes and industries. Nobody seemed to feel that these terms should be arranged so the prisoner would hardly notice "em.- "It is going to seem funny to me, at least, when I read of a judge saying: 'I find you guilty as charged and sentence you to 60 days in jail. Would you like to serve it all in one lump?' "Naturally the prisoner is going to reply: 'Well, I tell you, yerronor, I have a job when I work at it, and it would be a favor to me if I could get back to it and go to jail only after my working hours.' " 'Just how would you like this jail term arranged?' the judge is going to ask. " T do not work Tuesdays or Fridays, Fri-days, judge. Tuesdays I go to the V JS55 JUST WHAT DAYS WILL yS 8E MOST CONVENIENT? ball game, but I would be willing to go to jail Fridays. It rains on a lot of Fridays, anyhow.' " 'Well,' the judge will say, 'under 'un-der this new law I guess Fridays in jail for you will be all right. Would you be able to fix it so you could report at the jail Thursday nights?' " 'Not very well,' the prisoner will reply. 'My work is rather tiring and I would rather go to jail early Friday morning, say around ten o'clock.' " 'Couldn't you make it eight o'clock?' the judge will plead. " 'Not without great inconvenience,' inconven-ience,' the prisoner will reply. " 'Very well, I will compromise and make it nine o'clock,' the judge will reply. "It is all very interesting if some-. some-. what disturbing," concluded Mr. Twitchell. "I hope the rest of the country don't copy the idea." a m MEMORY I remember once, so long ago, A sweet springtime in the rain When a boy took me out riding Whom I never met again. We drove into the country. Where the fields with grass were green, And saw a weathered apple tree The first one we'd ever seen. It's boughs were bridal robed in white. There in the rain it stood. The boy stopped near and wondered If a few stolen blossoms would Destroy its grace and beauty If it still would be the same. 1 can smell the rain-washed petals, But I cannot recall his name! Sue Saltus. Add similes: Hc was running faster than if he had received an offer of help from EiiRI;lci. Dewey may be the bright star m the G. O. P. heavens, but look closer and you will sec (lie Will-kie Will-kie Way. . A soup proof iH-ektic has been perfected. Somebody Is always worrying about what happens to uic soup. IHALOGUKS Q.-How are things nl homc? A -Well, we're not getting 0n so "e l since my wife's mother came to live with us. Q.-The old ruth column, oh? Ex-Kaiser (greeting the German troops In Ho,lad-Whll, detah, |