Show OUR CHILDREN by ANLLO PATRI THE LONG AND SHORT T TAKES a nice sense of dis crimi I 1 IT nation to know when to encourage a child to independent action and when to restrain him the aim of all our teaching Is to make the children self helpful the areat problem Is to know when it Is safe to send them out on their own one Is never sure it Is certain that we cannot bring up a child to the post adolescent stage as a dependent child and on his birth day anniversary turn him loose with the idea that he can take care of him self belt self direction Is not an overnight matter it Is a slow growth fed by ex perien ces some of these experiences must come in infancy the others fol lowing along in their appointed places the infant Is dependent upon us for his very life but it if we continue to keep him so he will be he must continue to be an infant we cannot ignore the various stages of growth and expect them to mature without use the budding powers wither and die good training involves understanding of the various phases of child growth so that they may be developed in turn and at the hlach tide of their powers self help beins when the baby can hold his own bottle or help to hold M it and it continues as long as there Is in his body even down to ae the span in between Is one of steady progress adjustment mas tery how flow soon a child inn can be freed of home r s iper viston depend upon the sart of child he Is the kind of mriln ing he has the sort of environment he meets in his dally exper experiences lences As soon as yo see that a child can corn com a job without your supervision praise him and tell him bo u lie ile win will master physical tasks first make a lot of his success know that the sp spiritual I 1 r igual victories come later and their roots are in these first tasks there comes a difficult time when children apel grown up to them selves they are able to g anywhere face any situation carry any to us who know them who have followed every stage of their growth they are not able to go alone they are long on one side and short on another it won t do to make them infants it v on t do to make them ad aeilts ailts we have to piece out their short sides and help them along until both sides balance there Is no easy way one steps along gingerly living a day at a time moving a snails pace by and arid by the miracle works and the child Is a man a woman in his own right rihl one just gropes and prays and comforts and counsels until then WHAT OF IT tecil of our complaining about M MUCH the children Is of no account many of our sharp criticisms are un necessary we have the picture of our ideal of a child in mind and when the actual child differs from the dream we are troubled tru tr bled or annoyed anno ed and at tempt to make the child inform to our notion mot of the friction in families Is caused by this tills mistaken at if a child Is born with a pug nose and the family likes straight ones bet tei if he has freckles and mother prides herself on her clear skin if he has big hands and feet and father has I 1 dainty ones if he Is reticent and the family loquacious whit what of it whit can he do about it or you for that matter the child was born with ch tic physical features with certain strong traits and tendencies are you going to make his life miserable because you fancied a different set for him or are you going to accept him good humo and do your best to help him grow to his own advantage N dext ext dime ime you feel tempted to s iff er because your child has some annoying characteristic one that Is not truly fundamental to his mental and phyll cal health just ask yourself what of it leep asking until the answer comes to you just nothing at all this child Is going to make hia his way in the world in spite of his red hair or his awkwardness or his what counts Is his 1111 mind if that Is strong it Is beautiful and mental beauty ulu the body with a radiance that wipes out all crudities if a child Is made to feel unfit his mind suffers I 1 am against mental sut suf fering for children adults too for that matter I 1 believe that it Is our duty to save children from mental distress whenever we can we ought to be on the alert to prevent it tha means we should not make remarks about a child s personal characteristics in a way that wounds hi spirit if a child Is awkward study how to help him grow in grace remembering all young things are clumsy at the start starl it if hair Is straight when curls would be lovelier if it Is a difficult color dress it to advantage no healthy child ever had ugly hair it if he has a blemish or a defect that yon you can 11 help elp help it IL if it can t be helped what of it I T dont believe children grow their own feelings of inferiority I 1 believe they are made tor for them by mistaken adults if a child Is taken as he Is with good humored affection he isn t going to look for something to worry himself about he will say as you say what of it a bell syndicate vim seim |