Show Kathleen Norris Says Pamela ame a Wants to Be Popular Bell Dell Syndicate Syndicate Service o 0 0 Z J lID U UA A n ti v i. i f s y t 4 f l lN N 4 p rr j i A Theres There's one girl and one man who are breaking my heart By KATHLEEN NORRIS AMELA wants to be pop pop- PAMELA P ular She works downtown downtown downtown down down- town in office a lawyers lawyer's s she maintains a bachelor- bachelor girl establishment with another another another an an- other girl she is 26 pretty enough smart above the average but not popular My manner isn't shy because i J. take good care it shant shan't be writes Pamela But way deep down In Im I'm shy I know men like my looks but a lot of them are shy too I guess guess except except the married ones The only attention Ive I've ever had is from married men and that doesn't mean much The younger men in our office and I could fallin fallin fall fallin in love with at least three of them will stop at my desk to dictate a leter letter letter let let- ter er ask me if U Ive I've seen this picture or that recommend a good murder story if they see a book on my desk and then pause by some other girls girl's desk for three or four words that drive me perfectly mad with bewilderment be be- wilderment wilderment and and I suppose jealousy I mean they will say to some really less-attractive less woman Fun at that crazy restaurant last night wasn't it or Crazy about the new hairdo or How about Tuesday honey Too Tense Among Men Why dont don't they do that to me But of course I know why I know Im I'm stiff awkward stupid with men I clear my throat t and get red and say things J J. dont don't mean to them My clothes are arc right but they're just a little TOO right Clean neat dowdy correct When I ought to shut up I giggle and chatter chatter chatter chat chat- ter and when I ought to break a silence si silence silence si- si lence I can do nothing but swallow and stammer But girls like me and I know I amuse them and as asI asI asI I say married men always seem to understand me and I can talk to them Now what I cant can't understand the letter goes on is the sort of girl who attracts men and always has lots of attention They seem to make no effort Brainless little fools who cant can't spell are trotting off oft for lunch with the nicest men In Inthe inthe inthe the office murmuring and blushing and having a glorious time Resents Being Overlooked Theres one one one-I I didn't mean to get this far but I may as well admit it it- it theres there's one girl and one man who are breaking my heart The manis man manIs manis Is my Immediate te boss but in a corporation corporation corporation cor cor- as enormous as this that doesn't mean hes he's so very high But hes he's sweet and big and cle clean and smart and I like him terribly I The girl is named Lola she's an uneducated noisy little thing with badly dyed hair in a wild mop but whatever she is or isn't he likes her I and she can actually play fast and loose with the dates he tries to make with her maybe she can go tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow tomor tomor- row night maybe she cant I If he marries her she will wreck his life leave him in a few years and take his child with her and it seems as asif asil asif if il I couldn't bear It t. t Why WILL WILLmen WILLmen WILLmen men fall for girls like that and never see other girls who really have background and education and code and the love of home and family behind them Well that's an old old problem Pamela and until men solve it Reno will continue to be flooded by pretty headed empty little wives who think nothing of breaking vows and ruining ruining ruining ruin ruin- ing childrens children's lives Girls' Girls Uneasiness Affects Men Your predicament Is not a new one either cither You say your manner is not shy but shy or not It is awkward awkward awkward awk awk- ward and uneasy and that infects men instantly with something of the same discomfort Perhaps you think too much of ot the impression you are making on them and too little of the Innate qualities that your manner represents Charm CharmIs Is an elusive thing to describe because because because be be- cause it means very real qualities It means heart soul mind character character character char char- acter training self With enough of these things any woman is equipped to face life and its changes confidently she KNOWS she will find friends win the man she wants make a success of her her- self Cultivate Charm But In your case I wouldn't worry about these casual and temporary conquests Ignore them for the time being and devote yourself to the cultivation of charm Get Interested Interest interest- ed genuinely in l life e and life will get interested in you Charm means personal freshness pleasantness of manner alert understanding understanding understanding un un- un- un and sympathy thy for everyone about you your It means that when you are sitting at your desk idle for a moment between tasks you are smiling half it means that you keep up with your reading on current topics and keep away from tactless controversy and voiced loud-voiced expression of opinion I If you happen happen happen hap hap- pen to be made of crusader stuff that is of course something else again crusaders rarely have charm To attract the man you like to you make no visible effort But whenever whenever whenever when when- ever you get a chance to speak to him have something to say that will immediately draw his attention from the fact that he and that rather rath rath- er standoffish Miss Brown are actually actually actually actu actu- ally talking together Years ago a certain shy little member of my family used to start off to dances after asking me seriously Tell me three things to say to my boy Think of three things to say to yours I If it is only you caught In that downpour yesterday or Is this new time schedule going to mean you have to take an earlier train from Pelham or Did hear the nice news of the Smith baby It will answer the purpose And if il after a monosyllabic reply you have to begin again plunge in courageously My sister and I were in Brooklyn when that storm started my mother lives over there You know In the Library neighbor neighbor- I hood We live in town but Mother I expects us every Saturday Saturday- and so on easily casily and carelessly just as asif asif asif if you were talk talking ng to a woman until until until un un- un- un til he picks up the conversa conversation tion again Act Friendly FrIendly Unembarrassed If the shy woman who feels stiff and tongue-tied tongue with men could only remember that talking to a newly met man Is just like talking to a n anew anew new woman acquaintance her whole manner and attitude would change Girls like Pamela never dread meeting meeting meeting meet meet- ing other women tl they ey know that their approach will b be friendly and unembarrassed Try that same friendly lack of embarrassment upon the man you want to attract Pamela try it on all men And at af atthe atthe the same time deepen your own character Into kindness Interest understanding understanding understanding un un- un- un of those about you and by the infallible magic of charm you will not only get your man nean but everything else you want In the world |