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Show i SOME REAL COLD WEATHER Grocery Drummer Felt the Frfsld Wave Coming and Took Precautionary Pre-cautionary Measure. "ColdT" repeated the grocery drummer drum-mer as ho camo Into tho lobby of tho hotel. "Where 7 When? What?" "But It's zero weather," was protested. pro-tested. "Zero weather? My friends, do you know what they would call this up in Winnipeg? Just a southern rophyr. Tho men would bo out In their shirtsleeves shirt-sleeves playing baseball, and tho women wom-en would bo wondering how soon tho grasshoppers would ho around." "You've been up there, have your tuna nalrart "Spent ono wholewlntor thero." "And how cold was It?" "Only 47 bolow most ot tho tlmi For'a space of four days It reached GO, but that was exceptional. Don't talk about zero weather to mo!" "Many frcozo to death?" "Hundreds. I saw ono man freeze to death whllo simply crossing the street." "And you suffered?" "Not a frost-blto. When I found winter was setting In and no chanco to get away I took my measures. Oh, no, I didn't suffer." "But how did you escape?" "I first bought tho hotel.. Then I had steam heat put In. Then I ordered 300 ton3 of coal and employed threo engineers. engi-neers. Then I had doublo windows put In all tho porches and verandna wrapped up In cotton batting. At every meal we had mustard and tabasco ta-basco Bauco and other heating things. I also kept all tho waiters swearing, and thus wo pulled through with the loss of only ono mhn." "And how was that?" "Oh, ho was an obstinate old cuss, who insisted on sleeping in a room with only flvo radiators going, and ha was found frozen to death in his bed. Zero weather! Humph!" |