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Show will have the kindness to begin," 1 am quite ready, eir," said Mr. Tod, to wliK-h another exclaimed: "AH right, sir, we desire no better; where is your triangle?" "S'lame on you, ' ' cried Professor Tod, i addn-iMing Mr. Car hart. "Are you the ! rua.-ter ut tins house:" "Why, ot" course I am," said Mr. Carf liart in amazement, und evidently regard- i ing me, represented as I was by Mr. Tod, as an ou t n igeo us ni aniac . ' ' W by , of couro I am." "Well, then," exclaimed Tod, drawing himself up, "then let me tell you, Mr. i Bogey" I "Uo is mad," shouted Mr. Caihart. J "Mr. litirey lives over the way. "e do j not oven -it. and 1 do uot know him at all. Are yo Mr. Cordova, the great amateur perfoi. on the triangle, or who the devil are yo " ' "Triangle againi" one vl. "Sir, I am Professor Tod, of Mudhaiu, r -wliom you have no duubt read (if you tak. The Mud!am Kegister or The Chick en boroug? Paiiaiiium) as a temx?rance lecturer of some little fame, I believe, and I received an invitation from you, or rather, as it appears, from .Mr. Bogey." "Oh! 1 will take the good gentleman over the way," said Mr. Carbart, and he did bo; and Tod slept at Mr. Bogey's that night, vowing that never again would liw be tempted to visit what he ; called "that sink of iniquity," New York, j R, J. he Cordova in Now York Star. could not very well perform music, and i especially the triangle, without notes, an 1 answer which seeined terribly to puzzle : Mr. Bogey; but that gentleman went on ( to say, coiL-iulting his watch, that it was 1 late and was I ready to begin? or would I desire to take something before I began, and he pointed significantly to the pitcher j ou the table. I I, thinking to gain time, if nothing el-ie, said: "Thank you, I would like to have a glass of sherry." A shudder ran through every member ' of the committee. "A what, siri1" in-quired in-quired Mr. Bogey. I "A glass of sherry," I replied inno- j cently, "or claret, or brandy and water, whichever is nearest your baud." Great consternation appeared to arise among the crowd at my very ordinary remark, which, I could perceive, was being repeated re-peated from bench to Ijench. "Brandy, bit, " exclaimed Mr. Bogey. "Are you mocking us?" "Well," said I, "anything; I am not particular. You asked me to take something to drink, and I said wine or brandy, or a drop or two of old Bourbon anything of that kind will do." Whereupon the lunatics began to hiss me, and one gentleman among the crowd called out that the man (meaning me) was a fool. Tho people rose from their seats. The utmost confusion prevailed. The noise became threatening. Mr. Bogey got up and. in a very severe tone and with a terrible frown, addressed me personally, saying: "Your conduct demands explanation, ex-planation, Mr. Tod." "Tod yourself,' Btiid I, now positively angry. "Who is Tod? Herel Crackles! Where are you? What is all this about Tod?" "Can't say," answered Crackles, and, guided by his voice, I saw him at the other end of thi room and heard him declare de-clare that they did not appear to have so much as a "tod" in the whole establishment. establish-ment. "Why, can't you see, De Cordova, Cor-dova, that this is a temperance meeting? We have evidently got into the wrong house. " ' "Certainly," exclaimed Mr. Boey, "you were, or, at least, Professor Hiram Tod, of Mudham, Conn., was to address this meeting hero to-night on the glorious subject of temperance and total abstinence, " 'A tfcuperance meeting!" cried I. "Certainly, sir," replied Mr. Bogey, "Now, who are you, if you please?" "Never mind who I am," I retorted, "I am not Tod." "Not nol" exclaimed a tall, thin and solemn man who had just come into the room and strode straight up to the platform with the air of a man who had a right to that place and took it. "I am," said the man, "Professor Tod, of Mudhaiu, Conn., and what I have gone through this night nobody would scarcely believe." Well, I need not say that neither Crackles nor I waited for any further explanation, but made our way to the street door with tho utmost celerity, where I saw the Carhart mansion in a blaze of light, and, understanding now how matters stood, and that I had been i undergoing torture through my having got into the wrong house, I crossed over : the way, and Crackles and I spent the , remainder of the evening with the intellectual intel-lectual Carharts. It appears that the trials through which 1 Crackles and I had passed were as nothing noth-ing in comparison with the martyrdom which that poor creature had undergone in the refined society of the Carharts, through his having mistaken the bouse by reason of Miss Henrietta's humorous joke. Because nobody in that company knew him. everybody had assumed the privilege of staring at him. The servants, serv-ants, when they ushered him into the drawing room, sneered at him because he was not well dressed and hadno white kid gloves on. Never having been in Now York before, be-fore, and living as he did in the no doubt classic shades of Mudham, in Connecticut, Connecti-cut, he regarded much of what he saw, with reluctance, as proof of the eccentrio manners of a strange people, whose de-! de-! generacy he deplored. He blushed when I he beheld young ladies who wore very ; low dresses and did not blush. His color deepened when he saw elderly ladies, whose cheeks, which were pale by nature, had been deeply colored by art; and he trembled for his reason as he saw languid young men dressed to distraction, with their hair parted in the middle, lisp tho most stupid and inane nonsense to young women, who not only seemed satisfied to endure it, but even appeared rather to like it. And this poor heathen, who had lived all his life in Mudham, wished himself back there with all his heart, as he remembered re-membered how plainly and simply temperance tem-perance meetings were conducted in his native viUaga, with cups of tea, a hymn or two and an address by Professor Tod. And he wondered what on earth all these musical preparations had to do with an earnest and soul stirring appeal not to drink wine or whisky. So there he sat in a corner, while Miss Henrietta performed per-formed a fantasia on the piano, and he wondered what all that merciless banging of the keys was about and why the young lady exerted herself to that terrible extent, ex-tent, and when the tune was to bo begun, till his brain was bewildered. So wheD Miss Henrietta had finished and everybody every-body had applauded the piano performance, perform-ance, he thought that now the cry to which ho was so well accustomed at Mudham Mud-ham would immediately resound, and that the people would with one voice demand, de-mand, "Tod! Todl" And still wondering wonder-ing where he was to stand and speak, he began clearing his throat and settling his cravat, as some public speakers have the habit of doing. Instead of calling for Tod, they, on the contrary, fell into groups with their backs turned to Tod, and disposed them-I them-I selves to listen to a quartet, which Tod thought was by long odds the greatest I private riot he had ever listened to. And amid tho din of the music Tod heard Miss Henrietta say: "Oh, why is not Mr. Cordova here? The music only-wants only-wants his triangle to be perfect." "Perfect?" said Tod to himself . "How ; can all this nonsense advance tiie sacred ! cause of temperance?" But imagine the , feelings of Professor Tod when that piece ; of music had been finished. Fancy, if ! you can, the horror of that good man , when servants entered the room in a ; sort of procession, bearing ice cream, I cake baskets, etc., laden with delicacies, while another bore a waiter upon which were decanters containing wines and all such sinful beverages. Thunderstricken by a sight so melancholy, melan-choly, the professor bore it all in silence until the servants stopped before him him! the great apostle of total abstinence I with the water of liquid damnation. ' and a lady inquiring of him, in a soft, insidious voice, if he preferred claret, champagne or liquor. Had he, then, 1 been invited to New York only to be ridiculed and insulted? Ho rose, and, thrusting his hands into his waistcoat his favorite attitude in his public addresses ad-dresses he shouted rather than said: "Look not upon the cup when it is red." "Dear me!" said the lady, while everybody every-body began to gather round the prof essor, "you need not have red wine f you don't like it. Try Chablis or champagne." "A vaunt." said Tod, "I touch not the accursed thing. Ladies, whv was I brought hither to perform my little part in the great movement now going forward, for-ward, if I were not wonted." "Oh!" cried a lady, "this must be Mr. Cordova all the while, and nobody has asked him to play." L'pon wluch one gentleman looked up into Tod's face and propounded this timely and sensible inquiry: in-quiry: "Haven't you brought your triangle, sir?" "Oh! insult me, ladies. Shame on youl Is it a Christian act to bring me from my happy Mudham home, to find myself useless and contemned?" "My goodness, my dear sir, said aaothar, "we aji want to tiear yoa if you AX EXCHANGE. Everybody in New York who is anybody any-body knows the wealthy, generous, h-s-pilabli! and clever Mr. OIed Carhart and his charming family. They had lived many years in Lexington avenue, and I am glad to know that they arT living there to this day. The Carliart maiiMuu is as well known, as handsome in an: hi- ! tecture and as grandly furnished as is the Urt house iu Fifth avenue. Mrs. Carhart j is known throughout the city for her i liiieral hospitality and her unstinted char- Uy. They have had but one child, a , daughter, a most accomplished girl, a cultivated nni-i'-ian, and a young lady of unexceptionable manners and le;iriiig. If Mi8 Hem -ietia had a fault (it fault it ran be called), it was a fotiduens fur harm lea. mischief. The Carharts frequent I v give very delightful de-lightful parlies, chiefly 'of the uitiM.-al sort, Miss Carhart being, as I have satd, a competent musician. And it had happened hap-pened that Mrs. Carhart had issued cards on Monday last for a musical soiree on the following Thursday. And among tho invitations were one for my friend, Charles Crackles, ami one for me. Crackles had been rather nioro intimate with the family than I was, and it is possible that my being favored with occasional invitations invita-tions from the Carharts was by reason of my being a very perfect performer on the 1 triangle, and therefore, in some sort, a desirable addition to the ordinary musical entertaiment. ! The Carharts, notwithstanding that , they did not much care to be very inti- i mate with the Bogey family, would not ! slight their neighltor, and when the cards were sent out for the Thursday a card of invitation was sent to Mr. Bogey. And thus it was that I come to narrate the mischievous work of our valwd friend, Miss Henrietta, who thought it would be , a matter of some amusement if she changed the invitations, sending to Mr. Bogey the one intended for Mr. Crackles and tle one for myself (which was done by sending both invitations to the wrong munliers), and also sending one to Pro- j fessor Tod, who had been invited by Mr. Bogey to hold forth on the temperance question on the same evening of the Carhart Car-hart party, so that Crackles and I, when we went to No. 1150. would bo going to the Carhart Boiree, whereas we should be going to the temperance and total abstinence absti-nence meeting. On the other hand, Professor Pro-fessor Tod supposed that by going to the i opposite house, at No. 1155, he would be going to address a large number of disciples dis-ciples on the absorbing subject of temperance, tem-perance, which wob the hobby equally of Mr. Bogey and Professor Tod. Accordingly, and as innocent as two "lambs of the first year," we went together in full dress to the Bogey residence resi-dence instead of to that of the Carharts. As we alighted from the carriage I observed ob-served that carriages were every moment , dashing up to the door in quick succession, succes-sion, whde there was scarcely any light 1 at)out tho premises at No. 1105. Strange) j Still worse, however, and more dis- couraging, was the glance I got (as I , j entered the narrow hall) of the persons j who were hanging about tho staircase , and the parlor doors. Why, somo of the guests had overcoats on, many of them had not been 6haved for ages and not one that I saw had patronized the hairdresser. V cry remarkable this ! But we were there, and we went into the. hall, and scarcely had Crackles and I entered before be-fore we were violently seized by four solemn, and I may add seedy, persons, headed by a man with a white cravat, who informed me that he was Mr. Bogey (I had never before laid eyes on Mr. Bogey) and that this was the committee and that we were rather late. What this meant I could not possibly divine. j Crackles and I were hurried up stairs : into a dingy room with one gas burner in ' it, where we were desired to leave our : coats and hats. Another singular fact! i The parlors below were evidently full of : guests, but there were not any other coats or hats about the darkened room. ! i We, however, laid aside our overcoats and hats, and it seemed very much to j embarrass these worthy persons when ( they saw us in dress coats, embroidered shirt fronts and white silk ties, and beheld be-held us drawing on white kid gloves. I give you my word that some of them wore woolen gloves. One of the committee here inquired of me how were all the folks at Mudham. I could not see any particular fun or wit in that question; but the gentleman, apparently ap-parently meaning it as a joke, I smiled grimly and said: "That is good very good, indeed glad to know you, sir." Whereat the inquiring mind of that niemberof the committee seemed puzzled and even disturbed, and rather to Bhrink i back into himself as a thing subdued. Another member then asked if I was ; ready, to which I replied that I was. In j ! this manner we entered the parlors. I Horror of horrors 1 There were rows of benches and chairs at regidor intervals, i occupied by persons in the lowest condition condi-tion of seediness. The ladies wore bonnets bon-nets and high dresses, and the gentlemen wore overcoats. Most remarkable musical musi-cal soiree this! The rooms were dimly lighted, and tho whole affair wore a most dreary appearance. Solemnly up the center aisle I was marched at tho head of a procession of the committee (Crackles, being alarmed, had remained at the parlor door), up to a little platform at the upjter end of tho . room, on which platform was a table, be- i hind which were several chairs in a semicircular semi-circular form, and on the table stood a pitcher of water and a tumbler. What iu the name of common sense could be tht meaning of this? There was not even a piano in the room. Queer musical party, certainly I Mr. Bogey motioned me to sit down. Always desirous of avoiding danger dan-ger to my triangle, I drew it from my pocket and hud ii on the table. Great ap-plauso ap-plauso followed this innocent action, i placing a triangle on a table, but scarcely had I d"me so when everybody in the assembly roc and took a distant survey sur-vey of the triangle. I then was required to mount the step of the little platform to get into a ciiair, when the whole meeting meet-ing broke out in a fit of the most enthusiastic enthusi-astic applause. 1 tn-mbk-d. Always inn. cent and colliding, I had suffered myself to holed, in white kids and fine clot 1 ling, and with my hair carefully dressed, into the midt of a society of decidedly derangexl persons. I rose to take a handkerchief from my pocket. The crowd again applauded, and I hastily sat down again. I "Our friends are giving you an onthu- siastio welcome, sir," said Mr. Bogtv. "Yes," said I, "thank you." And, de- ! voted as I am to art. the heroic idea ! seized me to save my triangle. I re- 1 ! moved it from the table, fresh applause following that movement, and I imme- ', diately dropped the instrument, upon which I heard a droll little man, leaning , . over to speak to a young lady in speo-I speo-I tacles, whiier to her friend. "He will j use that thing as an illustration; I have i heard of his doing so. It is very interesting." inter-esting." i My listening was, however, interrupted by a question from Mr. Bogey. "Have I you your notes with you? or perhaps you j do not use notes?" I answered that I I 1 |