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Show HI O.en Ifettep. M' H In view of the fact that mystery is the key to public H, ! interest as well as the life blood of religion; and H keeping in mind the pernicious effects of leaving the H dear public in doubt as to the authorship of the H I various Ogden letters which appear in Salt Lake H U weeklies, permit me here to disclose my identity so Hj 3 that he who runs may read. Of course I am a news- H J ' paper man. I may be the Ogden end of the Tribune the city council will probably think I am. Or, the keen-scented correspondent of the Herald nosing . for news in unfrequented places and hero of many HL scoops. Again, keep your eye peeled on the News B ( man here. H There are various reasons why I might be he, or H ' he like to be me (what's the matter with those pro- H I nouns, anyway) least of which is that he can smell a H piece of news as far as Charley Penrose can detect a H i, gentile. Or why not find me on the Standard staff. B -I There's Francis overworked and .poorly paid i grinding out defences of the tariff while his soul longs for the Elysian fields of Socialism. Or Carroll. Now stop a minute. I may be Carroll the heavy- B . weight city editor whose clothes bear daily evidence H that he sleeps in them, but who could not be pried H s, loose from Bill with a jimmy. If not Carroll, I may B , be Bill don't throw the paper away, dear reader, I B ' i am not going to elaborate. However, if you have to, B J ' hold your nose while taking a dose of Bill. How B f would some of the graduates of the Bill school suit B h you. There is Pulver, Hanson, Chambers and the Lt rest. If I am Pulver who can blame me; besides B ('' whose business is it but no, Charley would come M A oftener than once a week. There's Hanson, fat and B ' lazy. He might do a stunt if he would stop the B T manufacture of political gold bricks long enough to . B 1 give his imagination a whirl and if you don't be- B a lieve it's him, ask Bill. If I handle the council, B t especially Hendershot, without gloves, I may be H Chambers. Or, I may be Fred Shiells, a little an- B cicnt, but still keen as a razor and on the inside of HH everything. If Rev. Maison says I am not Shiells, EH copper the bet. Don't overlook Littlefield, for thirty H v years an editor, nor Thomas, who manager to run a B . newspaper without visible means of support. It B wouldn't hurt me to be either one, as in that way lies B t experience and good judgment. Last, but not least H l our Dr. Condon? Watch me and see if I drop B into rhyme; if I write like the singing of birds and H the laughing of girls; if I use a rapier with the force H i of a bludgeon; if I handle the king's English like H Dana or Watterson I may be Condon, And still, as H j Roberts said in the House of Representatives, there H are others. Now that I have told you who I am, H ' don't quit me cold,, but subscribe for "Goodwin's H Weekly," and I'll see you every week. H ii By way of introduction, let me say that we are H doing business at the old stand the Junction city H the railroad center of the west and the future H . metropolis of the intermountain country. We have H our crosses and our crowns, our opportunities and B I our disadvantages. We have Bill. Amen. We have H jf the fuzziest bunch of city councilmen that ever prac- H'l ticed nepotism or overrode a mayor's veto. But Bj 1 withal, a lot of good fellows. A little unused to the BJ.jf harness, maybe. But fuzzy. We have more hobos, jHlf more creeds, more taxes, more politics and more V I good nature than any other town on the map. To H I: say nothing of the army of workingmen, the house- H 1 owners, the clever sons and beautiful daughters, the B f splendid corps of legal and professional talent, than B'J whom the .earth has-none finer. All these we have. Hjf Yet a few things and we would be supremely con- c tent. We want the streets paved and sprinkled. 1 We want the parks improved and kept up so the Hff? stranger within our gates will not suspect these un- HK sightly patches of green to be hog pastures. We HB , want the library finished, taxes lowered, and we want Hk the waterworks. And why shouldn't we have them? Uk But more of this anon. Make the Weekly a perma- BflHfc nent institution in the home circle and I will tell you JH8BQF all about it. |
