Show I I Kath Katheen een Norr s Says Mother Should Exit Gracefully hell Dell Syndicate Features Feature k I l kr I i iY i Y 1 1 t N l f t tA AWN A year ago George began going with a woman I will call Louise She is 31 a widow and not pretty By KATHLEEN NORRIS ARY CARTER is a widow MARY and her son George 28 is all she has A daughter died at 12 15 years ago and her husband died when George was only eight She has lias lived for him When he went into the navy she suffered as did all mothers of sons in the services When he came back safe and sound she settled down to a life of complete happiness with her boy But a year ago says her letter letter letter let let- ter George began going with a woman I will call Louise She Is 31 not pretty a widow with boys bos of 7 and 5 She belongs to a n large and ordinary family and when I say ordinary I dont don't want you to think me a snob They are good people but not refined Louises Louise's sisters work in the box factory her mother keeps boarders an uncle is a post- post master There is no real fault to tobe tobe tobe be found with them but George has been bee brought up among different people and It breaks my heart to think of him getting absorbed by them I own my own lovely little Spanish Spanish Span Span- ish cottage outside of Glendale the letter goes on Everything In this house is done with Georges George's comfort comfort comfort com com- fort in mind But when he Is married married married mar mar- ried they plan to live with her mother paying her board and having hay hav haying ing their meals of course with the rest of the boarders I cannot see how this arrangement possibly can succeed My feeling is so strong against it that I have begged George to postpone his marriage until they can find a suitable apartment but for the first time in his life lite he seems entirely Indifferent to my wishes Has Hostile Attitude Naturally this does not make me feel very friendly toward Louise Louls She could easily persuade him to wait walt I have not met her family but she has dined with me several times and I do not dislike the girl However I feel teel she Is an utterly unsuitable wife for George To start marriage in a crowded boarding boardinghouse boardinghouse boardinghouse house with her two small children as a responsibility is to doom the marriage from the first Apart from my own heartbreaking loneliness I will have the tho agony of seeing that he is miserable I III could threaten him with disinheritance disinheritance disinheritance but that is a theatrical attitude that I hate to make He Ismy is ismy ismy my all all in in He knows It and I Iam Iam Iam am convinced that he is taking advantage advantage advantage ad ad- vantage of it Please advise me about putting all this to the girl or telling George that his hasty marriage will put n barrier between us that may take years to break down I am desperate with disappointment and anxiety over this and beg that you will forgive forgive forgive for for- give what may sound selfish and monopolistic It is only Georges George's welfare and what it may mean to toa toa toa a brilliant future that causes me such bitter grief Louise simply Isn't the woman for him she him she is ambitionless ambitionless am- am slipshod lucky happy and will drag him down to her own going easy level Please help me So much for Mary Carters Carter's letter She wont won't like the answer but I print It because it applies to so many other mothers mother of adored and only sons It is time for Mary to step k 4 i l I 1 v My feeling is so 80 strong A HARD TASK When a Woman loses her husband she size seeks another outlet for her affection and ordinarily if she size has any children she will witt shower them with her love Mary diary Carter is a widow with only one son for whom she has a profound love But now the inevitable has happened George met a girl whom he intends to marry malTY His mother disapproves disapproves disapproves proves vehemently Jealous a and n d tenacious mothers should reflect back backon on their own making love-making days suggests Miss Norris They must realize that they cannot possess their children children chil- chil dren forever A time arrives in every mothers mother's life when she assumes as as- a secondary role in her childrens children's lives Another er woman and in some cases another man takes her place down and try to get it through her head that George belongs to another woman now Whatever she gets from him in affection attention and companionship will be just so much velvet She has no more right to tell him with whom he should fall tall in love than her husbands husband's mother had 30 years ago to control the heart affairs of Georges George's fa fa- ther I If these jealous tenacious mothers moth moth- ers only would look back one generation generation generation gen gen- to their own making love-making days they would get a revelation that actually would shock them I Iam Iam am sure that if I asked Mary Carter Carter Carter Car Car- her mother mother law in law ter about own she would answer prettily for she Is evidently a cultured charming prosperous woman Why she was just a dearl dear She didn't want Bob to marry so young but she really came to like me Bob and I us used d to go see her whenever we could We couldn't go often but he did see his mother pretty faithfully Now ask yourself Mary if this much would satisfy you Because that's what youre you're going to get Louise and George will come to se seyou see you whenever they feel they can and it wont won't be often When they do come it will be for a short superficial superficial super super- sort of visit with engagements pressing them They'll want you to see the baby and to come to Easter dinner but you'll feel feel and and with reason rea rea- son that son that you dont don't belong any more morein morein morein in their actual lives than you did didin didin didin in that of Mohandus Gandhi From now on it willbe will Georgie Mother never sees you and I know Mom but Im I'm coming out next week week sure sure thing I If it is any comfort to you to know that you are experiencing only what other mothers mothers all all except those poor enough to be of some real use to their children children go go through you have that consolation But you asked for advice so here are arc two pieces for you First go call on Louises Louise's family mily and be friendly and simple Second move out of that ideal Spanish bungalow and let the young couple move in Wake up Mary and find your own loved and loving part in the story |