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Show sou April Page the lAuGhiNg K1444{x, Workplace Bullies: ChangeloUrftehavior or (Coming So011) Balk lieelaw '‘t H-4441,4, she does her, Justina responded, "Because they are my friends." Gala is clearly singled out. When working under these conditions, I know from personal experience, an employee is more likely to mess up because they feel like they are walking on eggshells because they are. It then because a vicious cycle. The more the employee is bullied, the more h/she messes up and so-on-and-so-forth. American business philosopher, Jim Rohn, has said, "The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly." Why are some leaders rude, why do they bully, why are they arrogant, and even foolish, stupid or reckless? Psychotherapist, Nathaniel Branden, known widely for his work on self-esteem, says, "There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity." Authors and husband and wife team, Drs. Gary and Ruth Namie, who I met years ago when they gave a talk at Oregon Health Sciences University in Portland, Oregon, state in their book, The Bully at Work, "In a matter of a few months, it is possible that a vibrant, healthy, competent employee can be driven to ruin—economic, physical, and emotional. And this is all due to the unilateral decisions made by an incompetent, insecure, vicious individual backed by the power of an employer who did not want to get involved in a "personal conflict" between two people." Gala is clearly experiencing repercussions from being bullied by Justina. "I just don't want to have health problems because it is too much stress," she says. "I want to quit every day, but I can't." Another email states, "I couldn't sleep all night, I was very My friend Gala*, who recently became a U.S. citizen and is originally from Ukraine, works at a junior college. She is beautiful, truly stunning, smiles incessantly, dresses like she would in her culture, is smart (holds two masters degrees from her country), still speaks with a slight Ukrainian accent, and is very well-liked. She called me recently to share with me how her boss is treating her. "I can't take it anymore," she cried. "I want to leave this hell ASAP, but I can't." Gala can't leave this job --not until she finds another one anyway-- because this is her sole source of income. "I am already ready to be unemployed...I don't want to take this anymore," she sobbed despondently. I first met Gala when I hired her as my assistant to an English-as-a-SecondLanguage (ESL) class I was teaching at this same junior college years ago. She was perfect for the position. She did an amazing job, the students loved her and I was so grateful in how she aided me and my class. And even though Gala was still fortifying her English language skills I truly believe her work teaching others to speak English helped strengthen her own. But that was then and this is now. It's difficult for me to hear that anyone is treating Gala rudely. She recently wrote me about her boss Justina*. "She doesn't treat the other employees like she treats me." Gala isn't recognized, but is instead humiliated in front of co-workers, students and staff. She has to document everything she's working on. She is denied requests for leave. She's rudely interrupted by Justina when working with a student and reprimanded whether Gala is speaking to a student in person or on the phone. Justina's tone is rude and condescending. Gala is micromanaged. Justina treats none of her other employees with any of this behavior. As a matter of fact, when Gala asked Justina why she doesn't treat her co-workers like CO - TO PLAY: COMPUTE THE GRID SO THAT EVERY ROW, EVERY COLUMN AND EVERY 3X3 BO X CONTAINS THE DIGITS I TO 9 7 2 Il r, 3 N 8 3 9 1 2 4 7 3 7 It 1 3 7 6 1 5 6 9 8 3 b£LS86ZI9 81 91, Z£S6 L ZS691L1,8£ L 8 S 64Z£91 Answers for this week 69PI18LSZ £ZILS96b8 16Z£9 68LS 9L£86SIZb St8ZLI9£6 FORCED LANDING One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said, "You had a great checkup. Is there anything that you'd like to talk about or ask me?" "Well," he said, "I was thinking about getting a vasectomy." "That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your family?" "Yeah, and they're in favor 15 to 2." LUCKY NUMBER 5 A 55-year-old man who was born on May 5, has been married 5 years, has 5 children, makes $55,555.55 a year, and who's lucky number is 5, receives a phone call from a friend. The friend informs the man that a horse named Lucky 5 will be running in the fifth race at the local track that evening. Excitedly, the man withdraws $5,555.00 cash from his bank account, goes to the races and bets on Lucky 5 to win. Sure enough, the horse comes in fifth. .41111111( ■ A flight instructor was sent out to help a trainee who had radioed that he was about to make a forced landing a few miles from the base. The instructor spotted the plane standing in a field small enough to present a real challenge to his professional reputation. With determination, full flaps and engine just above the stall, he maneuvered into the field. Climbing out, he shouted angrily to the trainee, "Just how did you manage to get into such a small field?" "I landed in the big field over there," the trainee explained, "but in order to leave room for you, I had the farmer tow me here." It Makes Sense...By Veda Hale Sometimes an accepted fact of life can come at us from a different direction and bring a nice "Ahha" moment. For instance, from a different culture's way of seeing it. Take the fact that all humans are energized with goodness. Well, I suppose there are those who would not accept that all humans are basically good. Certainly we all know some or read about some who we conclude couldn't have a shred of goodness them. But they probably do someplace or did have sometime in their life. How about this way of saying it: They have a "windhorse" they forget. The Tibetans use that visual image. Sakyong Mipham is one leader who talks about it. We in southern Utah can identify with horses, maybe not with a Tibetan holy man, only because we know little about him. If we did, we'd likely think of much he says "Oh, I like that! Sounds like what my culture really teaches, too." Windhorses. "Wind" that lifts us and is universal and "horse" the goodness to ride and direct and actually make use of. They represent our loyal helpers, our extension of self, even after all these years when the machine has pretty well replaced them, we still lift our eyes in appreciation of them. So, the windhorse, as a symbol of the good intentions in every soul, seems to make sense as a symbol to embrace and let help us release the desire to do good. Not just to have the desire but to do something with the desire, as the horse represents movement with purpose. We all come to our own wisdom symbols. But today, I think I'll paint a "windhorse". It makes sense to find your own. Send suggestions to Veda Hale Box 956 Panguitch, Utah or email vedahale@ yahoo.com BEHEF1T DIMMER for Ralph & Colleen Goff Mark your calendar and join us for an evening of C61,4b0/ FLUSiC md Poetry Joining us all the way from northern Utah will be Doug Keller, Jerry- Brooks "Brooksie and local artist Kenny Hail Friday, April 239 2010 County- Fair Building, Panguitch„ Utah Don't miss the Cowboy Dinner Meat, beans, salad, rolls, cake and drink $5.00 a plate minimum donation Dinner 5:30pm to 7:00pm. Entertainment 6:30pm to 8:00pm Come support this local family! Garfield County residents ages 16-55 are needed to participate in 2 7 8 MEDICAL ADVICE 6 3 4 stressed. I felt terrible, I couldn't go to work." When Gala asked Justina in one of their meetings with human resources and her union representative --after Justina told everyone present for over three hours about all the things Gala did wrong-- to name one thing she did right, Justina fell silent. Anyone else read any red flags here? Come on. EVERYONE has at least one thing they're doing right. Gala told them, "I am only asking to be treated fairly and professionally." I wonder, truly, is this too much to ask? That would be a huge NO. Pennsylvania lawyer, Susan Lessack, states, "Workplace bullying is harassment that's not necessarily based on an employee's protected characteristic, such as gender or race. Bullying can adversely affect physical and emotional health. But, unlike harassment based on a protected class, bullying may not be illegal." That was two years ago. News flash: If you're a bully, change your ways especially since many states are at work to make bullying in the workplace illegal. Did you hear that? Bullying will someday be against the law! And if you are a victim of bullying in the workplace, here's what you can do if human sources and your union representative are not helping: See if you have enough evidence that falls under harassment or discrimination. Then contact either your state ACLU or a lawyer. You can also visit your doctor and see if h/she will document the effects on your health. You may then be eligible to take a three month paid leave of absence under the Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993. In the meantime, kill your boss with kindness. *Names have been changed. © 2010 EverylCounts, LLC. All rights reserved. Cynthia Kimball Humphreys is a professional speaker and trainer through her company EverylCounts, LLC (www. every 1 counts .net). She writes a column for weeklies in southern Utah and is a southern Utah correspondent for the Deseret News. Her column, "GR8NESS," appears on deseretnews. com. She can be reached at kimball@every 1 counts. net. pOiNt!: FOCUS GROUPS Participants will receive $50 for their time. Southwest Behavioral Health Center is sponsoring a series of focus groups with Garfield County residents to learn more about prescription drug misuse and abuse in our community. Focus groups are small groups of 8-10 people that share their opinion on a topic at a one-time meeting that lasts approximately two hours. You can participate regardless of whether you have had a prescription for pain medication. You must be 16-55 years of age to participate, and minors will need parental permission. The feedback from the focus groups will be used to create strategies to address these issues in our community. Your participation will be kept confidential and your responses will not be linked to you in any way. In addition to receiving $50 gift card for your time, refreshments will be provided. Several dates and times are available; please call to reserve your spot. (435) 634-5604 CLEAN DIESEL TRUCKING INITIATIVE Announced by Gov. Herbert, nearly $600,000 in federal and state grants will be spent to help 15 trucking businesses install anti-idling devices in long-haul trucks. These devices are intended to reduce fuel consumption and prevent the release of harmful air emissions. The funding is made possible with a matching grant from the Environmental Protection Agency's Clean Diesel Grant and DEQ's Division of Air Quality. |
