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Show 5 March 1996 BY Crass: Wasatch Canyon Reporter Volume Il, Issue 7 Publisher | | 1 March 1996 John Bresee Editor David Charles Baker Production Director Balog Staff Mystic Ron “CPA’ Pinner Web Crawler zoned Real Estate Editor AlexAnder “Alex” Miller SnowMan = Craig “BirdMan” Gordon Contributors David “Pardn’r’ Peck ~. Kristen Ulmer . shawn Emery Lee Bellevance Marta Heilbrun East Coast Bureau § AnDrew Partridge | James R. Bresee, Jnr Contributing J. Daniel Hall Photographers Lee Cohen Jack Popowich Chris “BigHair” Murray Mark Anderson | | Brian Mellenbach WCR Legal Squad = Brady “Tort” Toensing, Paralegal Eddy “Slapp” Carrrolll, Ill, ESQ Advertising Sales Tad Turgeon Guard Dog “Boy’ Dog Groomer THe Snow PAce SUBSCRIPTION FORM THIS PAGE Ma03 cm Os bn) ae 1 e5 a ty a 47a PARK City Jumpine 1: Town Series PARK City JUMPING Z: GELANDE MN Ade Aaa 43 Our First Poem: AVALANCHE Te SNe SRA es gO Come ay vere Y TT Carolyn Baker Distribution Copy Editor John, David & Balog Yeah, right.. Intern Now accepting applications... Warning: All the employees of the Wasatch Canyon Reporter are incredible athletes in top physical condition and are highly trained in the activities described and depicted in the pages of this newspaper. Unless you train like a bantam weight, you risk catostrophic injury or death. Stay on the couch. FANCY YOURSELF A GREAT WRITER OR SHUTTERBUG? The WCR welcomes all writers and photographers. We do not, unfortunately, pay much. Well, anything, really. Read information below if interested. If still interested after that, call. Letters to the “Editor” should go to the address below. We publish every one we get if it has your name and address and you don’t call anyone a *@$%#&!” We'll withhold your identity if you ask, but we gotta give it to anyone you libel. The Wasatch Canyon Reporter is a community newspaper published once or sometimes twice a month all year. The next issue comes out in a few weeks. The WCR is the medium altitude alternative published by another bunch of people with a computer anda laser printer. This paper is staffed exclusively with volunteers. 12,000 issues jare mailed or hand-delivered to a wide variety of people and places in and around our canyons, the lower 48, and the world (one issue goes to Hong Kong). We can’t afford that subscription verification service yet, so trust us. Ali material © 1996 and all that. Printed on partially-recycled paper. In the unlikely event there are old papers left when we deliver the new ones, we recycle those. No swiping our brilliance without written permission of one of the top three names on the list above. The opinions expressed in this august publication are those of the writer. A surprising number of people lack a good, solid sense of humor. Try to find yours if you read something you hate. Until you see a “Fact Checker’ listed above, accuracy is not guaranteed. Caveat Emptor. You get what you pay for. If you don’t agree with something, write a letter. Or better yet, type an article and send it to us on an IBM-compatible disk with printout. We welcome art, photos, 35,000 word manifestos and gifts of food. We might run it if it doesn’t stink - but most stuff stinks. Be sure and include a photo release if your sending a photo. None of that Apple stuff, please - we use. Word, WordPerfect, Photoshop. & QuarkXpress for Windows. Submissions will not be returned so do not send us your only copy of anything. If you enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope we'll use it to pay a bill or something. Buy some ads please! TO SUBSCRIBE: $20 for about a year, $38 for two or so $1000 for a lifetime subscription*; to: WCR SUBS, PO BOX 8118, ALTA UT 84092-8118. Special offer: BUY 10 SUBSCRIPTIONS for $200 prepaid, GET 1 FREE*. Order them for all your friends. *Do this and get a free psychiatric interview from “Dr.” Baker. Back issues $2 each. Bulk discounts available. Wasatch Canyon Reporter PO Box 8118 Alta UT 84092-8118 Voice 801-486-1388 Facsimile 485-2735 CompuServe E-Mail to “76761 ,205” America Online E-Mail to “WasatchCR” j j ¥ Me See, se http: Our meager website: WWW,WCr. com BULLWHEEL qyi 3 yi v) 6 Vf 3 8 9 |