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Show ee October 1995 Wasatch Canyon Reporter VITAL Volume. 1, Big Issue 16 _ October 1995 . LETTERS TO THE EDITOR DEVOTED READERS : CREIGHTON’S CHRONICLES _ Publisher John Bresee Editor David Charles Baker Production Manager Balog Staff Mystic Ronny “Pow-Mow” Pinner CREIGHTON Real Estate Editor AlexAnder “Alex” Miller US _ Advertising Sales Manager Taylor King — BIG Kurt J. Nilsson Contributing Photographers Chris “BigHair’ Murray Craig Dillon RON MIKE WCR Legal Squad AT UTAH | | RESORTS 7 AGLE swnS) BRIEFS RON’s ALPINE ASTROLOGY ele PENNER 11 ALSTON MARTA | S HEILBRUN 15 BULLWHEEL Brady ‘Slip and Fall Guy” Toensing Eddy “Dog Bite” Carrrolll, Ill, ESQ _ Adam “WeddingBlues” Chase Animal Trainer Carolyn “Julie” Uhle Golf Pro e SKI SWAPS Cover Boy Kelly “WhiteBuffalo” Hancock Physical Analogs David “TwoShirts” Peck Travel Agent | Home BREW : | oO 6 STAFF Contributors _ pee WASATCH Marta “Mrs.Mystic” Heilbrun | TRAVAILS TESTING RUSSELL Big Ron's Fan Club President/ Staff Writer | SKI TEAM DRUG Melanie Kay Edgely © ; Bell Cow Creighton “Hey-Suse” Hart 4 HART DAVID PECK Advertising Sales lee Cohen READING “ COVER PHOTO BY: Chay Dillon Sara “Crash” Lindeman > SUBJECT: We think <t 4 Ever Dillon.» Geoffrey “@#$%”" Arend The FurBall Maxie — LOCATION: Craig's summer dash subscription*; to: WCR SUBS, PO BOX 8118, ALTAUT 84092-8118. Despite what you may hear or read, we really do send out the papers, eventually. New, special offer: BUY 10 SUBSCRIPTIONS for $200 prepaid, GET 1 FREE*. Order them for all your friends. *Do this and get a free psychiatric interview from “Dr.” Baker. . Back issues $2 each. Bulk discounts available. Letters to the “Editor” should go to the same address. We publish every one we get if it has your name and address and youse don’t call anyone a “@$%#&! or discuss bathroom activities. We'll withhold your identity if you ask, but we gotta give it to anyone you libel. The Wasatch Canyon Reporter is a community newspaper published once a month until November when we got back to twice a month. The next issue comes out sometime in November. The WCR is the medium altitude alternative published by another bunch of people witha computer and a laser printer. This paper is staffed exclusively with volunteers & we'll take anyone - we even. let Creighton write. 12,000 issues are mailed or hand-delivered to a wide variety of people and places in and around our canyons, the lower 48, and the world (one issue goes to Hong Kong). We can’t afford that subscription verification service yet, so trust us. All material © 1995 and all that. Printed on partially-recycled paper. e TO SUBSCRIBE: $20 for about a year, $38 for two or so $1000 for a lifetime No swiping our brilliance without written permission of someone who works here. The opinions expressed in this august publication are those of the write. A surprising number of people lack a good, solid sense of humor. Try to find yours if you read something you hate. Until you see a “Fact Checker’ listed above, accuracy is not guaranteed. Caveat Emptor. You get what you pay for. If you don’t agree with something, write_a letter. Or better yet, type an article and send it to us on an IBM-compatible disk with printout. We welcome art, photos, 35,000 word manafestos and gifts of food. We might run it if it doesn’t stink - but most stuff stinks. None of that Apple stuff, please - we use Word, WordPerfect, Photoshop & QuarkXpress for Windows. Submissions will not be returned. If you enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope we'll use it to pay a bill or somthing. When. making a right turn onto a multi-lane road, remember to turn into the right lane. DO NOT make a right turn into left lane. It's dumb, rude, AND DANGEROUS! Against animal testing Thanks. : Wasatch Canyon Reporter : America On Line E-Mail to “WasatchCR” Ht really happened. Video available: ges ~~ Stop by ae ae Ma. bvsducan to $ 3,333. “ = Wee Fo show you if photograph. Shirt pictured available for $ 5,555. . PO Box 8118 | Alta UT 84092-8118 | _~ Voice 801-486-1388 | Facsimile 485-2735 CompuServe E-Mail to “76761,205" |