Show rhia by KIN HUBBARD A s Q T N r folk used t wa t patiently fer saturdays Satur dayt come t take a bath er de on musk it took years an years t break up th ole musk practice next t th letter that v e long fer ther faint bothin that comes as slow as reforms after many anxious years 0 wait in two thirds 0 th states 0 th union have passed I 1 aws flain th weight 0 a bushel 0 cowpeas at fiftysix fifty six pounds it has been a a tedious process but th won in the end fer per years th prune une hogshead stood uncovered near th grocery door while th tub oysters reclined agin th hitchin rack an th mackerel barrel auz th prize fly catcher 0 th period its it s a wonder those who went t hear jenny lind er henry clay ever lived t tell th tale when you think 0 th ole time grocery folks coed t wait patiently fer saturday t come t take a bath er depended on musk it took years an years t break up th ole musk tice th business men used t take ten minutes t worry down a heavy dinner an indigestion reaped a rich harvest T aday day th humblest banker takes three hours he hes s chinkin while he eats hut but he a s away from th din 0 th addin machines an th odor ci musty bills A tellers fellers personal ap bearance pe arance never used t occur t him till th church bells rung er a circus come t town an it often took th funeral 0 someone near an dear t make a feller put on a prince albert A feller used t think that if he had better clothes at home he auz all set T day th advantages 0 bein dressed up kin hardly be ove over resti estl mated if you re sellin so methin ther s a little reform wave t aday day that is ga catherin therin force from many re gardin th free lunch fork th free lunch fork used t make th whole world kin but were we re up fer yeara years we weve ve all been th same fork in friendly rivalry sometimes th prominent merchant has t wait five minutes on th leading drayman an then th most poplar pop lar bill poster has t wait on th most prominent mer chant who attempts t resign in favor 0 a well known attorney it will take some time t break up this practice but sure some more sanitary means should be devised whereby cold slaw an beans kin be taken int th stoin ach girls use t shake with fear an trem blin as they were led t th altar now they beat you t it folks use t wear thick soggy flannel under wear an dance till daylight in close stuffy halls without comment T day they d be put out 0 th bulldis right now there Is a little under current 0 objection t our present day method 0 handlin soup th teelin 11 grow as time goes on an finally crystallize itself int a general revolt an become allied with our world wide crusade agin useless noises it Is bound t come th feller feiler that eats soup like a walrus is doomed why it auz as late as th eighties before we begun t question th ad vis visibility ability 0 sideburns it took heroic work but t day you won wont t even en counter a set in th felt boot districts trousers used t be lined as late as seventy years after th declaration 0 american independence an many 0 us even aday t day turn purple with rage when we remember how our big toes used t get caught caught in th linin all these reforms took time it Is needless t call at attention fention t th women s clothes 0 t day fer per years women stuck t th same ole waist line IT T day it fluctuates like an adam a apple an art adds variety an ex cit ement an robs th passin show 0 it a ole monotony an sameness protected by adams newspaper S service arvice |