Show care for everyone and cars that 2003 run on disposable diapers? What about Gladys Knight 10 giving tips to the Mormon Tabernacle choir? Unrelated I know but just as incomprehensible and just as true Ralph we need you back It’s a shame about Ralph cal physics for pro wrestling the economy done Let me talk retro for you lately? Like gravity and die Way back then in those wild NFL tiebreaker formula it is days of consumerism Barbara Walters and Geraldo Rivera too big and all encompassing used to actually be journalists ' to understand The DOW and but or I and “60 Minutes” drew higher down NASDAQ go up never know why I know about ratings than “Friends” So what happened? Did businesssupply and demand I studied es suddenly become altruistic Adam Smith’s invisible hand and honest or did we just stop and I refinanced my house three times signing way too trying to figure it out? One word — Enron many unread thick documents We have no idea how the each occasion I’m sure I will be haunted by these docueconomy works and for the most part we don’t care ments when Zion’s Bank California didn’t like the way invokes its the economy was going so clause'Not so long ago and not at they fired the governor and "T elected an action hero The all far away there was a thing Bill businesses suddenly become altru-Istl-c called “consumerism” It was gave president everybody and boncst onto! we Just stop try led by a now marginal presi- - " ' $200 so they would all buy a dential candidate named Ralph DVD player and things would ' ing to Ilgam Itout? One wort— toron’ be OK He also figured Nader Consumerism was so but nobody really knows what cool that Nader once appeared nobody would do the math i: ment companies Nobody knows for sure why MormonvS they mean What about hous-in- g on Saturday Night Live Many : and figure out that $87 billion mountains and large bodies of remodeling? What about a young impressionable people V in Iraqi home improvement ' make to water salt combine " r not unlike myself wanted to be would come to $340 for index? What about making W such a strange brew like Ralph in much die same everything man woman and goods so durable that youdid--1 kids want to child in die US 7' V: Now even NPR blandly way n’t really need to buy more die starts the drones whoits is be like Mike LaBron or housing Locally Utah doing durable goods? What about confidence consumer and to the ever the current hot shoe economy part keep ' durable goods numbers as ifsavings? What about reduced endorsement guy is How :V wackier than a pifiata Utah is ' national debt? What about k the league in they really mean something much have things changed? ' currently leading three-da- y -terms weekends health ' These the have Nader into several joined poligoing Ralph important categories likes of Dolby noise reduction — bankruptcy home foreclo-tics is sort of like Albert Einstein abandoning theoreti- sures and weird food supple- - What’s Dennis Hinkamp is a freelance humor columnist Kving in Logan He to among a number of free-lance writers whose columns appear in The Herald Journal as Coctie part of an effort to expose read- era to a variety of community voices He is not an employee of the newspaper Feedback at dhinkampOmsncom Friday : ' 1 - v'C-'V- ' - Herald in NO EXCUSE FOR ABUSE s f ’ ' Calil-800-897-U- - 21st-centu- : ry For Free Confidential help with v domes tic violence ' - : - - Friday Monday : a uckmfc etperiuce the thrill aad chilli of the NEW ' -- ud ttorics (Sitanbjr Wagou rides am-- 00 pm--- ft Gill 911 inan emergency Look yowseK ia ova eight acres at CORN-fuioCimei 830 oafy) Hogs-Wort- (Simcly) or oa Hiaatd Hollow Kid Maze R Campfire Vittles -- Piunpkia patch (SOtpapkiai) OpcaMooday through Saturday util November kt T1C1CETS FOR HAUNTED HOLLOW 08 THE CORN MAZE ARE: 85 each for adult $4 each for ftpdcati aad aeniorx 83forchiMiai3-lLudki(b2aaduide-r Friday October 17th 7:30 130 North 100 East ' pm SI OFF WHEN YOU BUY TICKETS FOR BOTH! For Sours of operation call Located oa Highway 8M1 Logan Utah Book Signing & Reception GET gctisFltEEI 435752-908- 9 Sponsored by US U Department of English Utah Writing Project and Chapter Two Books or visit awheorg iaWelbvilkjwt outside of Logaa AMERICAN WEST HERITAGE CENTER Experience it! Ib r rAtf-W- ’ fYn ' The 9 Page |