| Show Friday February 18 1949 THE WEEKLY CARBONICLE Page Four left hand This has a great psychological effect on the manner in which they die You will find the eloped shmoos under the nearest turnip leaves this being a natural habitat for shmoos Immediately separate the boy shmoos from the girl shmoos and vaccinate for turnipphobia the dreaded disease that turns the egg yolk of shmoos purple This disease is obtained from shmoos that touch the turnip leaves with their right ear My recommendation is: While the shmoos are still small gently snip off their right cars thus immuning them against turnipphobia If you will follow these fey instructions of Doctor Dumb you will become a very successful shmoo rancher Be sure to use the WHO’S WHO By Lyle Conover ARLEN CLAVEL Arlcn was born in Hiawatha March 19 1930 lie went to school in Hiawatha for his first nine years Then in the tenth he came down to the Price Junior High Graduating from the tenth he spent six months learning the ins and outs of polio Finally over here in the senior high we find him the president of the senior class and in the Senate Club Arlcn likes basketball baseball and Valcne Reese KENNETH McKEE Kenny was bom in Lethbridge Canada April 19 1932 He moved to Price in the fourth grade and has attended the Harding Price Junior High and now Carbon where he was elected of the Junior class LEWIS MYERS Louie is really a Price boy He was born in Price ahd attended all the Price schools from the Central right up to old Carbon high Last year he was the president of Price Junior High He plays football and basketball and goes with Merlcne Jeanselme vice-presid- Letter to Students Core of Shmoos By Grant Fausett In raising shmoos we must always remember that this is a very rapidly multiplying animal but under rigid regulations one is able to control the number Doctor I M Dumb noted authority on the proper care of shmoos says “The boy shmoos should always be kept in the presence of man They arc very bashful and have an inferiority complex when in the presence of any female The girl shmoos can be kept any place where it has a moderately warm temperature Be sure to keep them in tight cages so they cannot escape for the girl shmoos have a mania for chasing boy shmoos making them very excited and unruly" A liny shmoo is man's best friend and a girl shmoo is woman's best friend if properly treated Shmoos will lay from six to ten eggs and give from four to six gallons of milk a day if you gent- ly stroke their backs and rinse them with water 675 F twice a day Make sure each shmoo has a private stall well draped with red velvet because they are very fond of this color It keeps them in a good frame of mind Should a pair of shmoos elope immediately destroy the remaining shmoos with a gentle touch of the index finger of the left hand This letter was written by a student in the Business English class We thought it was done so well and so descriptive of our own situation that we arc passing it on to you YE STAFF Dear Students: SCHOOL By Nick Nikas Little Dan Cupid had himself a mad time at Sweetheart ball last The little fella was Monday like crazy all over arrows shooting the place Some hearts he just touched with his love darts othFINALE ers he hit pretty hard Take it If you sharecroppers rememfrom a guy who knows ol’ Danul ’em ber of quite some time ago I made pretty hard really hit some statement that going steady the I still think so shmoes was for Florence Poulos shows evidence of the love night well spent with but sometimes being a shmoe is that sparkler she’s sporting around not as bad as it seems on the third finger of her left Thirty hand The lad that put it there comes from Grand Junction Colo Tracy: "Since I met you I can’t His name is Paul Vansant eat I can't sleep I can’t drink" Tillie: (sympathetically) "Why Some of you cats can probably not?" remember Douglas Johnson Tracy: “I'm broke" of the yearbook last year Well Cupid got him too He gave his girl Thelma Barnett a diaj Why Not Join mond just before they came to the Sweetheart Ball Ah these Senators! Your Friends co-edi- tor ent NO About the Campus Notice: Lee Gordon finally got Robert TOMORROW! Bryncr's ring That was the headline of our paper but you showed up to HONORABLE MENTION: Because you have a subscription to our publication and were not informed Hundreds of students have subscribed to our paper and find it enjoyable reading This year it has grown from a three column paper to a four column one Under the supervision of Mr Washburn it has many additional feature stories and editorials Our paper will let you in on the latest gossip triumph or defeat in sport news feature stories editorials and our school progress— also the latest jokes! Learn about your friends and your school through your school paper If you will come to our publication office any time during the next week you may have a free copy of the latest issue along with the subscription you purchase The sooner you subscribe the more quickly you will understand what is going on Very Sincerely Yours IiA VAE De ANGELES school scrubbed and waxed floor Approximately 8000 square feet of floor space is nothing to sneeze at (although with some of the colds being heard about around here it's more sanitary to sneeze at the floor than in someone's face) Orchids to you Neph Higgins and Babcock! Why? DIDN’T The doors swing in and the doors swing out the students come in and the students (?) go out but do they ever notice the fine Job being done by Carbon’s ever - slavin' janitors? faithful floors The especially deserve attention They are kept surprisingly clean for this kind of weather and lately have been weekly if not oftener sporting a shinily at the Strand Nile Club Where MERRY-MAKIN- G IS THE NOT THE EXCEPTION Bessie Mike Advocate I UTAH’S BEST System WE HAVE THE BEST IN Fresh Fruits AND WEEKLY Vegetables i Dedicated to Ben Ward: There once was a fellow named AT THE NEWSPAPER Pat Pat) Lowest Prices Owned and Operated by at When the car that he had Was really fixed bad By a horse on the fender that sat (Author’s note: Couldn't find a rhyme for "Ben" so had to use SKAGGS “Efficient Service" i Who didn't know where he was and Andy Helper OP §1111- - RULE— i JAMES l Price & HARRY SMITH Utah Helper |
