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Show THE CITIZEN 6 ,will sell, on a closer margin, due to the fact that sell these portions in larger quantities than usual. they will buy and if possible. Being too proud to fight the administration should adopt some other method of bringing quick first aid to the kidnapped. feasable to post a list of the ransoms the Why would it not-b- We have not met the fair price commissioner for Utah, but we assume that he has fewer than a thousand eyes. We suspect, indeed, that he has but two eyes and, therefore, we wonder how he will prevent the stimulated demand from forcing up the price of the cheaper cuts. If lie were able to keep the promise his publicity agent makes for him, it would be by arbitrary decree involving intimidation. There is no ground for saying that the profits would lie illicit, for as the demand increases the dealer will be compelled to United States will pay for the recovery of abducted persons and publish it in all the newspapers of Mexico and also. circularize the varioii bandit camps; Such a list might read somewhat as follows: All Mexican. Bandits Attention.' The following rewards will be paid for the safe return of kidnapped American citizens: $50,000 Young Bachelors d Bachelors 50 25,000 Young Married Men Old Married Men 1,000 : 50,000 Young Girls Old Maids 10 This, of course, is a tentative list merely a suggestion. Some members of Congress might be willing to pay more than ten dollar., for the return of old maids and some of our congresswomen might think fifty dollars a high price to place on old bachelors. That is a mere detail. The object is to meet the wishes of the bandits insofar as it may be possible. A satisfactory trade can be opened up only if the bandits learn to trust us. At present the market is being ruined by speculation. If prices can be fixed the bandits will know just what to expect and will promptly return the. stolen goods.' 1 , pay more for his meat. The fair price commissioner assures us that the retailers undoubtedly will sell cheaper. How does he know that? Theoretically the price of the cheaper cuts should be advancing because of the demand already stimulated by the approach of Week. Whether the condition accords with the theory we do not know, but it appears to us that the entire campaign is based on an economic fallacy. If the profiteers desire to advance prices abnormally they can despite the warnings and the threats of Mr. Palmers envoys extraordinary in the various states and territories. Mr. Palmer made a bad record when he tried to regulate the sugar market and his cheaper cut campaign is apt to make him a target for inextinguishable laughter. ! ; Save-Money-on-M- eat m The President might resort to a bipartisan price-fixin- g board, such as is to be employed in adjusting the wages of railway men. Thp President could select, say, seven members and the bandits seven members and the meetings could be held at the White House. During the meetings secret service men could watch the silverware to see that the bandits got their share. HELP THE POOR BANDITS If our boys in khaki are to be debarred from making a new foray into Mexico, why not try to placate the Mexican bandits who Steal good American citizens and who hold them for ransom or kill them as occasion seems to warrant. Once in a while the ransom money is slow in getting to the bandits and they make no bones about turning a live gringo into a corpse. Presidential idealism will not permit us to sate our desires for ' vengeance, but it ought to save the lives of the abducted Americans I SWANSON I Some one says dough. college-bre- d means a big loaf, but it means THEATRE CIRCUIT I PRESENTING ONLY THE BEST IN MOTION PICTURES 1 STRAND AMERICAN GEM Four Days Starting Tomorrow Opening One Weeks Engagement Allan Dwans Master Production THE LUCK OF THE IRISH A From the Story by Two Bewildering, Colorful Photodrama of Modern Life in Smart Society A MODERN SALOME HAROLD MacGRATH i In FUSS AND FEATHERS SALOME JAMES KIRKWOOD AND ANNA Q. NILSSON Starting Tomorrow ENID BENNETT From OSCAR WILDES Great Dramatic Poem Featuring Days Featuring YOU MUST SEE this amazing, gripping, drama of travel, adventure, love, spell-bindin- g romance and humor. intrigue, A Charming Star in a Charming Story A combination of comedy and melodrama with a touch of With Notable Supporting Cast GORDON BRETLAND at the organ MISS LOLA LEONARD in vocal selections Special Feature IN LOVELANDS GARDEN Ted Henkels Waltz Ballad Comedy, HOPE HAMPTON AND WYNDHAM STANDING SPEED TO SPARE Introducing a fascinating star in a spectacle of amazing magnitude, action and human appeal Written and Directed Christie Comedy by Leonce Perret Orchestra PATHE REVIEW Mutt and Jeff Comedy, CHEMISTS REGULAR PRICES pathos Comedy OFFICER CALL DONT LET PREJUDICE KEEP YOU FROM STATE STREET SALT LAKE IS TOO BIG TO BE A ONE STREET CITY A COP CHESTER OUTING |