Show UJ JJ 1 I i II i i K A Ause I B us hl x 1 i League I IJ f s sK J Ber I 11 VI II II 11 K By 1 i t r EDNA FERBER x r rY I ti I Y t A X I IC 3 I I r 3 f X I a I A As 0 Frederick A. A Stokes Co I a s a rj AkA 4 p pf pI I I f l This is not a baseball story The grand stand does not rise as one man t. t and arid shout itself hoarse with joy There isn't a three-bagger three in the entire three r thousand words and nobody is carried home on the shoulders of the crowd r 4 For that sort of thin thing g you need not squander fifteen cents on your favorite fa fa- v magazine The modest sum of o I i one cent will make you the possessor possessorS S N of Pink Un There you will find the seasons season's games handled in masterly fashion by a six seller artist an an t. t expert mathematician and an original- original Y slang humorist No mere short story dub dub may hope to compete with these f In the old days before the gentry of the ring had learned the the wisdom of investing their winnings In m solids instead in in- L stead stead of liquids this used to be a aY at t f favorite conundrum When is a prize prizefighter vc r Y t fighter fight r not a prize fighter i fo Chorus Chorus Clorus When he is tending barI bar f I Irise rise to ask you Brother Fan when Is a ball player not a ball player Above bove the storm of facetious replies I 4 shout hout the answer When hes he's a shoe sho clerk f rf i j Any nr man man who can Scan look handsome In ina ino o a Ci dirty ty baseball suit Is an Adonis H There is something about the baggy pants and the shaped Micawber-shaped her shaped collar and the skull skull fitting fitting cap and the foot or or r so of tan or blue or pink undershirt undershirt undershirt under under- shirt shirtsleeve sleeve sticking out at the arms that hat just naturally kills a mans man's best i. i points Then too a baseball suit res requires re- re s f quires so much in the matter of leg 1 j Therefore r-Therefore when I say that Rudie w was s a dream even in his baseball uniform with a dirty brown streak right up the side of his pants 0 where he had slid for base you may kI know w. w that the tha girls camped on the z grounds during the season rIu During the s summer mm r months our ballpark ball t 4 park is is s to us what wh t t the e Grand Prix is isto isto to to P Parts Paris or Ascot is t to L London What I care care rewe we we that Evers gets ten thousand f fI a a a Year c or r J. J it t month I w or that t I 1 x i 1 Chic Chicago's g s 's South uth side ball ball ball park seats seats' e ts thirty thirty five five thousand or Is It million J Of Of or what Interest are such meager items compared with the knowledge that b Pug g who plays short goes with Undine Meyers the giri girl up there therein Inthe in the eighth row TOW with the pink dress t and nd the red roses on her hat When Pug snatches snatch s a high one out of the firmament we yell with delight and I even ven as we ye yell l we turn sideways to look up and see h how w Undine is taking it it Undines Undine's fixed shining eyes are on r J f fL fi L i h ll fv LG r I P I V p 1 i Y Youre a ure Going to the Ball all Game c With Me C r r b Pug and b he knows It stoops to f 1 brush the dust off orr his dirt dirt begrimed begrimed r i ff baseball pants takes an attitude of ofa a careless graco grata and misses the next A play l I Our grand stand stAnd seats almost two I the boxes But counting thousand 1 O n iry y the snobs and the girls girls' with new bats hats sit in the boxes Box seats are rt x comfortable it is true and they cost only an additional ten cents out but we P r have come to consider them undemocratic t J 4 cratic and unworthy of true fans Mrs Freddy Van Dy Dyne e who spends her 4 4 in Egypt and her herr summers at atthe winters th the the ball comes out t to the game every afternoon in h her r automobile but buthe f JI very every I she he occupies a box seat so why l' l in the r we She ches up I d grand st stared stand d with the r rest st of the Uie enthusiasts en enthusiasts en- en n- n and when Kelly puts one over she Sho stands up and clinches her fists and waves her arms and shouts with the best of em She has even been known to cry Good ey eye Good eye when things were at fever heat The only really blase individual in the ball park is Willie WiIlie Grimes who peddles peddles ped pede dIes ice cream cones For that matter I 1 I once saw aw Willie Willi turn a l languid head to pipe in his thin voice voice voice- Give em em a adark adark adark dark one one- Dut Dutch h Give em a. a a dark one Well that will do for the first dash of local color Now for the story Ivy Keller came home June 19 from Miss select school for young ladies By June 21 she was was ivas bored limp You could hardly see hardly see the plaits of he her white tailored shirt waist for fraternity pins and secret society emblems and her bedroom was ablaze with college banners and pennants such an extent that the maid gave notice every Thursday which Thursday which was upstairs upstairs upstairs up up- stairs cleaning day For two weeks after her return Ivy spent most of her time writing letters and waiting for them and reading the classics on the front porch dressed in a middy blouse and a blue skirt with her hair done in a curly Greek effect like the girls on the covers of of the Ladies' Ladies Magazine She posed against the canvas bosom of the porch chair with one foot under her the other oth oth- other th er swinging free showing a tempting thing In beaded slipper silk stocking and und what the story writers call slim ankle On the second Saturday after her return her father came home for dinner dinner din din- ner at noon found her deep in volume tw two o of Les Whew This Is a scorcher he exclaImed exclaimed exclaimed ex ex- claimed and dropped down on a wicker wick wick- er r chair next to Ivy Ivy looked at her father with languid interest and smiled a daughterly smile Ivy's father father father fa fa- ther was an insurance man alderman of his ward president of the Civic Improvement club member of five lodges and an un habitual delegate It generally was vas he who introduced distinguished distinguished dis dis- guests who spoke at the opera opera house on Decoration day He Hec c called Mrs Keller Mother and he wasn't above noticing the fit of a gown on a pretty feminine figure He thought Ivy was an expurgated edition of Lillian ian Russell Madame De and arid Mrs Arent you feeling well Ivy he asked Looking a little pale Its It's the heat I suppose Gosh Something smells good Run in and tell mother Im I'm here Ivy kept one slender finger between th the leaves of her book Im perfectly well she r replied plied That must be beefsteak beefsteak beefsteak beef beef- steak and onions Ugh And she shuddered and went indoors Dad Dad Keller looked after her h r thoughtfully thought thought- fully Then he went in in washed his hands and sat d down wn at table with Ivy and her mother Just a f e n no onIOns Her father put down his knife and fork cleared his throat throat- and i thus i You Yo get on your hat and meet me meat meat I at the 2 45 interurban Youre You're going to the ball game with me me Ball game game repeated Ivy I 11 But But Id I'd Id I'd- Yes you you do do o Interrupted her father fa far ther Y Youve been moping around here looking a cross between Saint Cecilia and Little Eva long enough I d dont don't nt care you If if if you dont don't know a spitball spitball spitball spit- spit ball from a when you see it You'll be De out in the air all afternoon and therell there'll be some some- excitement All th the girls go You'll Jike like it They're playing n Ivy went looking the sacrificial lamb Iamb Five minutes after the game was ca called e she pointed one tapering white finger in the direction of the pit pitchers pitcher's hers her's mound that she asked Pitcher explained Papa Keller laconically Then patiently He throws the ball ball I Oh said Ivy What did you say his name was I didn't say But its it's Rudie The boys call him Dutch Kind of or a pet Dutch is Rudie murmured Ivy dreamily What a strong name Want some peanuts peanuts' inquired her father Does one eat peanuts at a ball game gam-e 1 It aint hardly legal if you dont Pa Keller assured her Two vo sacks said Ivy Papa why do they call it a diamond and what are those hose brown bags at the corners and what does it count if you hit the ball and why do they rub their 1 hands lands In the dust and then then spit er spit on them and what salary does a pitcher get and why does the red red haired haired man on the other side dance around like that between the second and third brown bag and doesn't a pitcher do anything do-anything but pitcha d wh whY wh- wh Youre You're Y ure on said papa After that Ivy didn't miss a game during all alf aIr the time tim that the team played in th the home town She went without a new hat and didn't care whether Jear Valjean got away with the goods n rt not and forgot whether you J third hand high or low Jow In inI I bridge dge bhe blie t hl even ven became chu chummy r with Undine Meyers who wasn't her kind of ofa n a girl at at all Undine was wall thin In in- ina a voluptuous kind of way if it such sucha a paradox can be and she had red lips lipS' and a roving eye eje and she sheran ran aro around nd downtown without a hat more than was strictly necessary ary But Undine Undine Undine Un Un- dine and Ivy had two subjects in com com- common mon Th They y were baseball and loveIt love ove Ris It is queer how the limelight will make heroes heroes of t us all Now Pug P g who was red red- haired and had shoulders like an an ox and arms that hung down to his knees liI like e those of an n orang orang l V IT beeves at t the Chic Chicago go stockyards stock stockyards stockyards yards in winter In the summer summer he slaughtered hearts He wore wore mustard i colored shirts that matched his hair and his baseball stockings generally had a rip in them somewhere but I when he was on the diamond we were almost ashamed t to look at Undine so wholly did her heart shine in her eyes Now we well we'll II have just another dash or two of local color In a small tow town n the chances for hero worship are few If it weren't for the traveling men our girls wouldn't know whether stripes or checks were the thing In gents gent's suit suit- ings When the baseball season opened the girls swarmed on it Those that 1 baseball didn't understand pretended they did When the team was out of town town our form of gr greeting eting was changed from Good morning or Howdy do to V hats hat's the score Every night the results of the games throughout the league were posted up upon upon upon on the blackboard in front of Schlag- Schlag ers er's hardware store and to see the way In which the crowd stood around it and streamed across the street toward toward to to- ward It you'd have thought they were giving away gas stoves and hammock couches Going home In the street car after the game th the girls used to gaze adoringly adoringly ador ador- at the dirty faces of their sweat- sweat begrimed heroes and then they'd rush home have supper change their dresses do their hair and rush downtown downtown down down- town past the Parker hotel to mail their letters The baseball boys boarded over at the Griggs house which is third third class class but they used their tooth toothpicks picks and held the postmortem postmortem post post- mortem of he the days day's game out In front of the Parser Parker hotel which is our leading leading leading lead lead- ing hostelry The post ost office receipts first base i In a a cunning effort to to jle- jle E e- e c ive the man man at bat In that favo favorite a to te attitude of pitchers j just st before Defore they get ready to swing their left leg and hist one over The second time that Rudie called caned Ma fa Keller Kener said Ivy I dont don't like that ball bail player coming here to see you The neighbors neigh neigh- bors ll talk The third time Rudie called caned Pa Keller Keller Kel Kel- ler said that guy doing here again 1 The fourth time Rudie called caned Pa Keller and Ma Keller said in unison This thing has got to stop But it didn't It had had too good gooda a st start rt For the rest of the season Ivy met her knight of the sphere around the i corner Theirs was was a walking courtship They used to roam up asfar as asfar asfar far as the state road and down as far faras faras faras as the river and nd Rudie Rudio would fain fain have talked of love but Ivy talked of baseball Darling Rudie would murmur pressing Ivy's arm closer when did you first begin to care Why I liked the very first game I saw when dad dadI dad dad- I 1 mean when did yo you first begin to care for me Oh When you put three men out In that game with Marshalltown when the teams were tied in the eighth In In- ning Remember Say Rudie dear what was the matter with yo your r arm today You let three men walk and Albias Albia's weakest hitter got a home run out of you you Oh forget baseball for a minute Ivy Ivy Lets Let's talk about something else Lets Let's talk about about us Us Well youre you're baseball arent aren't you retorted Ivy And if you are Y Yr 1 r ii t k W y 4 1 I 1 I j I Ii I See by the p Papers p rs' rs That s Been S Sold ld t to Des Moines Too Bad We Lost HI Him record for our town was broken during dur dur- ing lag the months of June July and August Au Au- I gust Mrs Freddy Van Dyne started the trouble by having the team over to dinner Pug and all After all aU why not No foreign and impecunious impecunious impecunious impe impe- princes princes penetrate as far far Inland as our as-our our town They get only as far faras as i i New York or Newport where they are gobbled up by many moneyed many moneyed matrons I If Mrs Freddy Van Dyne found the tho supply y of available e lions limited why should s she le not try to content herself with a a jackal or so J Ivy was asked p H Until then she had contented h herself rs eIt with gazing at her hero She had become such a a hardened hardened hardened hard ened baseball fan that she followed the game with a score card accurately jotting jotting Jotting Jot jot- ting down every play and keeping her watch open on her knee knea She sat next to Rudie at dinner Before Before Before Be Be- fore she h had d nibbled her second salted almond Ivy Keller and Rudie weiler understood each other Rudie illustrated certain plays by drawing lines on the tablecloth with his knife and Ivy gazed wide-eyed wide and allowed her soup to grov gro cold The first night ih th Rudie called Pa Keller thought It a great joke he sat out on the porch with Rudie and Ivy and talked baseball and got up to show Rudie Rudle ho how he could h have ve got the goat of that Keokuk catcher if f only ho he had tried one of of bi his famous open- open faced th t ws iwa Rudie looked politely interested and laughed in all the right places But Ivy didn't need to pretend pre pre- pre pre- tend Rudie RudiA spelled baseball to t- t Lr r. r She did not think of her caller as as a good looking good looking young man manin manin manin in a blue serge serge suit and a white shirtwaist shirt shirt- shirtwaist waist Even as he sat there she saw him as a a- blond god standing on the pitchers pitcher's mound mund with the scars of battie battle battie bat tie tle on his baseball pants his left foot placed in front of him at tight right angles I with his right foot foot- his gaze fixed ed on i a I 1 am Did you notice the way that Ott Ottumwa man pitched yesterdays yesterday s lie le didn't do any acting for the grand grandstand stand He didn't reach Teach up above his head and wrap his right shoulder with his left toe and swing nis arm thre times and then throw seven inches outside the plate He just lust took the i ball in his hand looked at it curiously curious curious- ly Jy for a moment and fired it zing it-zing- zing like that over the plate Id I'd get that ball ballif if I were you you this a a. grand night murmur |