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Show I fNESPAYAUGUST 31, 2011 DIXIE SUN -- 11- jtudent involvement top priority for pollster oil P The Guy gets firsthand response from DSC student body tion if students GREGORY LAYTON staff Writer feel that. wanted to test the waters by putting myself out to you. This week I spent multiple hours polling students about their knowledge of the I am a I newly ac- -' quired ; writer for , ' our , newspa per and you as a State ,nt of Dixie feel that should ;ge 1 paper. - If you saw a guy with perfect golden brown hair holding a clip board while stationed near the doors of the Whitehead Student Service Center, then you saw me. I talked to more than 100 people and had results that didnt shock me. paper too. in writing purpose eCted toward pleas- - 'jour ji and entertaining renting you. Iques- 05 polled students randomly, man on the street was. An understandable 32.3 percent responded style. correctly. asked three questions. First, did they know the school had a newspaper? Only 68 percent responded to know Third, I asked if they read, or have ever read, the newspaper. 17.7 per- 1 I of the newspaper. Stu- dents should realize almost every higher educational institution produces a newspaper. If they knew the school had a newspaper 1 would continue to ask if they knew what the name of the publication ACCURACY OF ELECTION POLLS ARE IN DOUBT : vtc&i Skewed Review makes tie all over so much Oprah couch, Im going to JACOBSON Opinion Editor MATTY Thanks to the benefits of col- - ; lege, I can now officially J declare the world will end k 21, 2012. 'ho knew college 'ses in which I had Mtial interest would ally be beneficial? dve decided to ap-'- 5 4 of our colleges ucal geography pro-'- n Someone please 'that news on to the just in were thinking 'Jnistration tthey it. iiitting learned the sun is a of a female it has an 11- - rfyson and of happy-go-l(- ircycle y Earth-warmi- toess akin to Lady fod has an cycle of raging then it iflie Sheen-lik- e in the flares. our nearest solar Jls a Es-llal- bipolar dream. pa-o- y, s !"d guess what? The 1Snet tantrum is 8 to be wait for 0012. besides not having about paying 'kany of my student "Uve also decided ry bucket list before ' iant ball of gas 0ne so big that nhs eyes will liter- -' water. I wonder if s what happened 1ena certain biblical 'ist built a huge Jlse Jake up Hs a to do liner? before I tell 5 mi m you going to do y life before we Plode like so Tom Cruise crazy give our celebrity star a review. They say you cant teach an old dog new tricks. Well, apparently the same goes for our sun. Im awarding it a strict dosage of Prozac from now until Dec 21, 2012. The only problem is the sun is billions of years old. It might just refuse the medication all together on grounds that it never had to take pills before, so its not about to start now. Wait, that might be the case unless it acts like the majority of our retired population, in which case pills would be like candy. Scientists: Get on that. The first item on my bucket list is something I already do on occasion, but now I plan to do it at every possible chance I get. Im going to laugh at the most inappropriate times in every situation Im a part of. Most people who know me have already figured out Im not the person to come to for advice. Im snarky and ridiculous, and its almost guaranteed that my personal advice will end up being more sarcastic than helpful. But in the event someone should come to me with serious advice, Im just going to laugh in that persons face. Matty, I just lost my job, John Jacob Jingle Heimer Schmidt said. I have four wives and 32 children to feed back in Colorado City, and I also found out I have cancer! Cut to me falling on the floor in laughter. Of der. Secondly, Im going to apply for every credit card offer that comes to me in the mail. Once I have many lines of credit, Im going to use that money and buy all the people I laugh at a fun presentlike a car or a good divorce attorney. Im not doing this to better someone elses life, so dont get me wrong. This will be an attempt to make amends, so I dont actu . cent confirmed. So what does this all mean? It shows that students could be connected more with their newspaper. Students need to be more involved. Michael Whiteside, a residents. junior communication major from Los Angeles, Naturally, there are said more involvement going to be an overpowin the newspaper would ering amount of homecreate a greater interest town students at the for students to read it. college, but the resiI want to make this dency numbers just indicate those with residency happen. What do you care about? What are status. Many students hot on the are from out of town. your thoughts I feel the greater contopics buzzing around I be can cern would be that those campus? your mediator. Let me know close to me would be what youre interested more prone to be inin. Ill find out what we volved when gathering all think, and then report opinions. Im guilty of it without any spin. just hearing what my friends have to say. We While polling, I tried to find out if students all are, and its natural. We are all surrounded would care to share I most found input. by multiple peers on a inwould genuinely be daily basis. We share our terested in sharing and most passionate opinions hearing what their fellow with those we are close to. We all have a social students think. bubble that is easy to Rachael Henderson, a stay in. I would like to junior nursing major to-d- o course I would justify my actions. Laughter is the best medicine, you know, Matty said. But really, anyone who laughs at that situation is just wrong. I would give any other person a review of five out of five wives who continuously nag and drain that persons bank account. Living in Colorado City is not fod- from Bend, Ore., said, I feel that hometown students are more popular than outside students and would be quoted more. This is a very reasonable concern. According to the Dixie State Colleges Spring 2011 End of Term Enrollment reports, 7,259 out of 7,801 students had resident status. Most students enrolled at Dixie are Utah poll people on a scale of one to 10 about their fear of talking to complete strangers. I bet 90 percent would have a number higher than seven. Many people are scared to talk to strangers. This is the reason why opinions are drawn from the people close to us. I dont want this to be the case. We as the Dixie Sun staff want to hear from you. Help us represent you, the student. Let your voice be heard. For those who are readers, go and get your friends to read. Tell them their opinions can be heard, documented and reported. It is my goal to make our student body more gregarious (pun in- tended, since my name is Greg) when it comes to the opinions of this campus. Give us your input on opinion ideas that you think are hot topics. Ill go to work and poll the students to see what they all think. Send me your ideas to dixiesunpoll-guygmail.coShare the word. list before Armageddon least, I want to go skydiving. In comparison to my other two goals to achieve before life as we know it pulls a season finale, this goal seems pretty tame. you so much! But I think Id like to Cut to me looking Mr. Schmidt right in the get a pair of wings surgically fused to my eyes. back so I can go skydivListen, Im sorry to hear about your caning sans parachute. PerBut haps I wont live, but cer, Matty said. when you die and get to youd better believe I heaven, just tell them I just might be as famous as Id always hoped to helped you out, OK? Again, I must interject be for just a little while. But dont really try with another review. folks. Anyone who who that, really Anyone horriwould do such a attempts that third item ble thing gets the rest of gets free plastic surgery from a dyslexic surhis or her life paying back the debt of each geon. Essentially the end result will be a perand cousin sibling, son with inverted knees brother from another and crossed eyes. But mother. You should on the upside, this pernever ask someone to son will be able to hear vouch for you in heaven. Do it your own things from behind very well on account of the damn self. ears being sewn on not Last, but certainly ally end up in hell. Oh, Matty, I thought you hated me, John said. But now I can drive from Arizona to Utah, and I only have one wife now! Thank (h ' So-pran- os PLEASE LETT MY backward. Im not advising you to not jump from a plane and attempt to fly for your own safety. Im telling you not to do it because I want to be the only one in history to have tried it. Do you believe all the hoopla surrounding the end of the world? I would love to hear whats on your bucket list. Like The Skewed Review fan page on Facebook at Face-book. comTheSkewe-dRevie- and follow it on Twitter Skewe-dRevie- Let everyone know if you think the end is nigh, and tell us all what you want to cross off your o list before we all cease to exist. Plus you can read some of the actual bucket list items I plan to pull off before we all bite the big one. Come join the conversation! to-d- APpRoVtU RatImct Rise, ADt LET by Ttt--e Atl Tttl jWt ascT10 ftUG JT IT IpJTj UST UDRU5 CxeccMBeR 2.' J 2. Ota. Nxhr' w OtA VAASfJ. |