Show I HUMOR HUr OR OF THE DAY The Great Authors Author's Nervousness Upon a day a n great author was wan to meet a famous warrior Are you rou going oln to put on your best beat clothes clothe 2 his bis wife asked naked Why should 1 IT r the great author asked I tol am to meet a famous warrior warrior war war- riot but what of ot that I shall I be e his peer even en In to my everyday clothes Upon another day rIny the great author was to I be C Introduced to a king Surely his wife you will now Jow put on your I best Cst clothes and make as good an appearance as ns possible replied the great author What do I 1 care for kings Long Iong after after aft att er this king is in forgotten my name will he IK a n household word I shall feel no awe In his presence another I d das y the great author dressed himself In the best clothes ho he hud had and lit lit- exhibited a It nervousness that calls not liCIt habitual with him Mm Why ore 1111 you OU putting on your Sunday Sun Sun- da day suit null asked his hiM wife And what Is III It that causes g you ou to tremble so Today replied I the he great author I l Iam lam am nm to uteri met my sty III publisher Chicago Chicago H His is Proposal Ami Andrew few tells tell of or a unique proposal of or marriage which was wa an actual happening in a t Scratch Scotch town where he tU was stopping one summer Mummer A t Snitch Scotch oth beadle cans r very much In inlove I j lo love and was wall extremely bashful lie fie could not hot make up UI his hiM mind Iud to ask the I woman for her heart and hand in the ordinary manner He made several attempts attempts at nt- I tempts but his bis courage courage al a always failed tailed him at the auspicious moment One day he be asked her to go o for tor a u walk and led the way WilY to the church hurch yard rard There finding the lot where when his ancestors lay ay h ho be pointed to the bead bead- stones and said All my folks are buried burled here Joan you rou like to be laid away hero here wl vI era em some day Everybody Everybody's Magazine A Tradition Shattered The Thc lady had bad no experience but she had a n lot of ot sense and determination So when she entered the market she was us as good as the next person parson She approached the stall of ot a butcher and felt Celt of ot the breastbone of ot a fowl Then she said Is this a g good od chicken Yes maam ma'am said the confidently as was his wont Then the old saying Is wrong wrong said the lady demanded the What old saying The old saying that the good die young Cleveland Cllveland Plain Dealer She Meant Well A 1 retired cler clergyman man tells a good story on himself He lIe used to officiate occasionally us as a Ii vacation supply In a suburban nn church hurch One ODe Sunday be he was H o tM h by an lID old lady a a. a housekeep housekeep- housekeeper er ll In III the tbt employ o of ti II friend I l want to tell you sir said she how much m I enjoy enJo going to church j nn the days I 1 that you preach The rhe clergyman ler said s he was very much gratified lo to hear henr It r ir- ir Oh sir she hl added with appalling candor I 1 get Jt such n II good gaud seat then Newark Star A Snappy Scheme Some very ery original features at the theVan thevan Van Million ball SO Yes they placed a In a adark adark dark corner of ot the conservatory a and d toward the end of ot the evening they assembled the gang and read aloud what the Intelligent ent machine had re- re corded corded Exchange Not Hopeless The Duke de Roquelaure was told that two ladles ladies of ot the court had a quarrel and had cast all kinds of ot In Invectives Invectives In In- at each other Did they call each other homely asked the duke No my lord All right then 1 I will see that they become reconciled Life What Did She Mean Mrs Were We're Were We're going to live In a better neighborhood hereafter Mrs Irs Keen Keen Keen-Ah Ah So are we Mrs Irs Then Then you are going to move too Mrs Keen No Keen No were we're going to stay right Boston hem here Boston Transcript Just In Time Oh Ob doctor do d tor exclaimed a patient I Iwas Iwas 1 was suffering so much that I I. I just wanted to die diet Well said ald the physician lan you you did right to call me in at New once New York American Noisy NollY Mrs Kelly This l This neighborhood seems a n a bit no noisy y Mrs Irs t Flynn lynn Mrs Flynn Flynn th only time Its It's quiet here hert is th elevated train goes goes by and aud drowns th Punch noise Punch I One Case Cuo There Is no effect without a It cause quoted the wise guy How V alx about ut when a n woman changes her ber mind asked the simple mug Philadelphia n Record I Wise Wile Bo Boy Teacher Teacher We We call calla n thing transparent transparent ent ant ent when we cnn can nn see ee through it ft Who can tan name such a thing Peter Peter Peter-A A ladder l Fun un Magazine Tile Th TJ Sweet Part How sweet to have hav n friend whom you OU can trust truse Yes Yea especially If It he doesn't askI alkI ask alk ion ou to trust hl Exchange him I |