Show fl T i iq Jt FOR c f NEW i-NEW YORK YOUNGSTER I H V GOT THC THI JOB i jn n troy Coy Who Dl Didn't Smoke S.-noLe Cla- Cla rettea j a and amI At AJI AJol- AJol M- M cante Fingers Were Vere Closely Examined nui lint But the the Man lan of Attaint Affairs Was Vuc Outwitted Out A prosperous man of affairs who ba ha his bis offices ces in a down town fawn sk sk- rapi structure entered the building the 01 other other oth oth- her h- h er day with a disturbed look on his face Altho Although Sh a man with ith full confidence dence deuce in and one whose judgment judg judg- judgment ment was second to no one oue else's in the strict he was vas doubtful of the result of the tho task L fore fore him Ho fie was in iu trouble because his office boy ha had bed 1 left him and he be was forced to engage another Tho The boy who bad gone gono bad had been a 11 pretty good one as us boys go He had bO bossed ed tho the be and run the for about a year awl and was wag all right when he lie bad had his big own way but ono one unfortunate afternoon be bo told the tho Mss that ho wanted to get off ori as his bis law brother law had bad died and ho lie desired desired desired de de- de- de sired to go to the funeral I want to go to tho the ball game gamo myself myself myself my my- self said the old man chuckling as he be recalled how many times that old funeral excuse had bad been sprung on him by office boys so so I guess James you will have havo to mind shop today James Jarnes didn't appear at the tho office next morning but an irate woman who said she was vas his bis mother did and md she soundly soundly soundly sound sound- ly berated the tho employer for his inhumanity manity in keeping James away from his bis laws in funeral The boss tried ti to explain matters by saying that ho bo thought James JameR only wanted an excuse to go to the ball gamo game and that he be did not know there bad had b been n a death in the tho family b but t it was was The whole family branded the theof theold of old man as a n brute of the tho deepest dye dyea lie and a James did not return to his duties Inconsequence In consequence ence of this tho the employer inserted an advertisement in one of the ne got ner newspapers for an all office boy and aud be lie bad had go got down to the office half balf an hour earlier than usual to receive the applicants applicants applicants cants for the tho place There was il a a long lino line of them in the Hie hallway in front of his hh office and nd he heard beard much criticism some favorable and some somo otherwise on bis his general appearance ap- ap p- p Ci as be pushed d his way through the throng He Ho called the tho boys into his office one hy ny one oDd end subjected each of them to a searching marching examination as as to to tp his experience fitness etc H Ho He invariably invariably invariably bly finished up with the question Do Do you emoke ci cigarettes The boys as as invariably invariably invariably in in- variably that they did n not fN f. f N Never ever smoked one ono o 0 them ther dope sticks in ill ate life hie declared the first boy called callerI into tho the office effice eh the old old replied man Let Lt mo E see e your fingers The Tho youngsters youngsters youngster's youngsters youngster's young young- ster's finger el stained a deep dirty yellow color colo and he e w was s told he be was not wanted 1 Dats Dat's not lot l Ot stain dat aint abt insisted l Ik e boy called into the office Dots Bats paint off mo me faders fader's hou houto houfe e. e Tho Iho excuse wouldn't work however and hois r esker d cut ant as several more more young rots aspi for office elute honors Finally a bright eyed redheaded youngster entered the office and answered answered answer answer- ed q all l the Ibo o questions propounded to him himin in iii a satisfactory way vay boy tho the final test Now my camo t tell ll me truthfully d do you smoke cigarettes cig cig- What's them tle paper ci cigar cigar ci- ci gar gaI answered d. d tho youth Yes Yes exactly Hope Nope Never Nover drew one of If them in int inter in- in t ter terne r me lungs in m me nie lifo life continued the boy Let me mo see Fee your hands bands The Loy poked out a u chubby fist at him Tho Thoman man examined it critically but failed to detect the sl slightest evi ovi- evidence evidence dence deuce of tob stain Youre engaged ho finally he-finally finally said Bully fer you 1 I replied the youth I. I So So long Ill I'll be bo ter work in do morning morning morn morn- orn ing ing He He then went out whistling ug Theres Only One Oce Girl In Iu the World For Me Mo and jl juiced joined his anxious comrades comrades com corn rades in the hallway fellers can all go 0 home ho hosai sai said Salt Salt- What What's yer given us D Did d yer get der job fob piped half a dozen voices Bet yer life replied the urchin n. n There was vas a loud murmur of l surprise from the tho crowd and 1 finally naJIy ono cf the tho youngsters claimed exclaimed Howd yer do doit it Y Do De old man said dot dit ho he didn't went want no copestick dope cope ope stick smokers an yer knows yer yer was de dope fiend in der push Oh youse fellers was vas so slow dat yera me tired replied in b. b a disgusted tono tone of voice Course CouIse I hitI le d dope pl sticks but dye tink I cf to nough ter ke keep p it from de deale dele deole ole ale le man luau Guess yer had a pull or yer couldn't have havo fooled his said one of the tho youngsters Easiest ting in de world answered answered answer answer- ed Chimmy As soon as I 1 read his ad advertisement in de r I knew dat dot he be hewus was again agin lope dope sticks so what docs does I Ido Ido Ido do but soak scab me fingers in turpentine all night an in do morning dey ey wua wu as ns clean as us a newborn babes New babes New New NewYork York Tribune I 1 |