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Show PAGE9 UNIVERSITY JOURNAL OPINION !THURSDAY, AUGUST JO, 2001 ANDY BURT COMMENTARY Expect more~get more Back to cbool-three of my favorite words. What's more magic than the squeak of clean new neakers and the smell of freshly harpened pencils? Girls wearing those pretty new dres es, and everyone hoping for a little k · ing-tag at rece . Everything is new. When th scho I year begins, we alJ tart out traight A students. Toe lazy wnmer is over and we may not admit it, but we're all a little excited to get back to school. Granted , th magic fade after about 12 minute in the cla r om, but for the first w k or two, the walk, or dri e to school always carries a tiny bit of excit ment with it. ~ ep the magic in mind. Every young oll ge co d was told this tiny bit of advice by a mom or dad, by an aunt or uncle . What was said was thi : "Th e are the mo t important and memorable times of your life, njoy them ." Or something like that. I agree. o should you-after all , you are paying for-it. You hould get more than a few letters on a white heet of paper. Alas, it's easy to fall into a routine . Class then homework then eat then leep. After that first week is over, after the newnes ends, it em like we au quit caring. Our expectation drop-what we expect from each other become less and what we expe t from our teachers drops, too . Wh n you begin a clas you expect to learn-three weeks into th. m ter and all you want is a break. I don 't know how many time each ~eme ter I hear some kid who it in the back of th etas whining about the amount of work on the syllabu . r will ·tr , what I a.id a few paragraph ago-you are paying for it. Our college years ar uppo ed co pr pare u " for Life , for our careers, for our future . _If an thing w hould be a king our tea hers form re homework. Who want to how up for th ir first day of work not really ure what ' going on, or ju t what it i th y're thee co do? What ' even worse than old whiny in the back of the room i the oth rs in the class that agrees with him in nods .. That' th group J u ually fall into, but thi year, I've promised myself not to . A · a matter of fact , if som on in my class i brave enough to whine in my presence I' m gonna chuck one of my hoe at him, or her. I'll just lea e the left one uolied so I can rip it off and whip it at the guilty party. I'm going to do the work, then I'm going to play like I' m in college. I firmly b Jiev that you can do it all . Just hurry up and d it. Don't put off your college years, they're here and they are going to be great. Finally, expect the best-from your teachers and from each other. We pay to learn, they pay to teach. If we learn to love learning, we'll remind them how they love to teach. And if I have to I can leave the right hoe untied, too. Andy Burt is a senior communication major from Tol.edo, Ohio. SOUTHERN UTAH UNIVERSITY C£0All CITY UTAH DIRECTING STAFF ANO DESK PHONE NUMBERS: Editor Kam lynn Savage 586-7750 Aasoclate Edltora Stacee Young 586-7750 Photo Editor Erin Madson 586-7750 Copy Edttor Lisa Young 586-1992 Focus Editor l.l>et1y case 586-1992 Arts Editor Alice Young 86S-8443 Sports Ecltor Jason Erlcl<son 866-8443 Au'l Sports Ecllor Mall( Jones 865-8443 Camery Lybbe(t 586-7759. Almanac Editor Lillian Kump e65-8226 Webmllster Russell WlJllams 586-7759 Ad Manager Chance Allred 586-7758 A.nt'l Ad Mgr. Heidi Petllf'SOO 586-7758 AcM_. la1TY Baker 586-7751 Wlfflng Coach Paul Husset>ee 865-8556 SENIOR STAFF WRtTEflS AND REPORTERS' DESK 586-n57, 586-5488 The ~ Journal ill published """')' Monday and n.u,-, al lhe ..:adcNnic: year by and I« lhe - · body ot Soulhem Ulah Un!Ve<atly. II recehrea advisement from lhe university admlnlatration and from lhe urivanity'• communlcalion depArmenl. The views and oPink>no •Xfl'NH<I ., lhe .JoumaJ .,. those al indMdolll wrlter.i and do not necessariy l'ffllocl lhe views of lhe .,.li1Ution, faaJty. •tall or student body In general. The unsignll<l adilcrial <ln!clly above Is the Ojl!Jion ol ihe ~ m a / "" • single entity. Letters "' lhe oditt>t ~ t be typMI and inc:lu<M the name and phone rwinber. Only lhe name will be printed. Name,, wi! not be will'lleld under any cln:umslances and l h e - rese,ves ll(jli<'g ~ Leners must be OIJCfri1!ed by 5 p.m. ~ lor In Monday edtlons, and by 5 p.m. MotlOays ,or Thu'1day G - ; Hr( - . a i wl1h e gilevance agu,ot lhe Jouma/ should <fired. SUCl'I prol>lem liro! to Iha editof. tt un<esolved. 1he! grieYance llhould 1hlln be dif8Clo!d lo lhe - . .. Unl-.Jry Jo<,n,./; Offlc:e9 In SW Tectwlology Building 011 . Mall at SUU, Cedar City, Utah 8'4720. FAX (- ) 586-5487. E-mol -.ss: ioumaJOsw.e r 1NTED ON RECYCLED PAPER. PLEASE RECYCLE THIS COPY. DAVE BARRY COMMENTARY Would you like a service agreement? Recendy, I wa in an electronic tore , trying to buy a telephone Lhat wa just a telephone. I did not want th onference-call feature , the intercom feature , the progra~mable memory 1i ature the c ffee-making feature , or che feature (thi i a new one) that di play the exact current latitude and longitud pf Rep . Gary ondit. All I wanted wa the feature 'that let you talk to the person on the other cod. Aft r much searching, I found a phone probably manufactured during the panishA merican War - that hardly did anything . ("RardJy Does Anything!." would be an excellent product Logan, if you a k me.) While I was looking at thi phone, a previously invisible salesperson materialized next to me and said the words that I have come to detest mo.re than any others in the English language except "pro tate exam." Those words are: "You d finitely hould get the service agreement." In cas you ju t got here from the Lo t Contin nt of Atlantis, let me explain the crviceagreement concept: When you buy a produ t, you pay extra mon y to the tore, and the tore give you a pi ce of pap t . Thi gi:ve you, the consumer, the peace of mind that comes from knowing that if, for any reason , al any time, omething goe wrong with your produ t, you will not be able to find the service agreement. Mo r like ly you won't even remember you bought it. tores LOVE service agreement , for the ame rea on you'd love to have money fall on you from the ky. As a re ult , when you buy a product today, you get chi bizarre multiplepersonality sales pitch, becau at the same time that the salesperson i telling you bow swell the product is, be' ugge ting it will need a LOT of rvice: SALE PER ON: o this f an exce llent product. Totally reliable. YOU: I'Li take it! ALE PERSO : It' going co break. YO ; What? AL ' PER ON : There ' th ' thing In ide? The onfabulator? You 're lucky if that baby last you a week. aying it ' s N T a good YOU : o you ' r product? ALE PER O : o! It's lop of th Une! Totally dep ndable! YOU: Well, OK, then, I gues 111 ALESPER ON: Of course, if the rclrenestator module blows , you ' re looking ac a 263,000 repair, plus part and labor. One cu tomer had to ell a lung. In ome stores, selling you a product seems to be merely an excu e to ell you the service agreement.- everal month ago, my wife ancl I were hopping for a computer, and a salesperson attached himself to us, lamprey-like. His sole profe ional contribution was to inform us no matter which computer we looked at, that we would definitely want the service agreem nt. At on point be t ok me a ide and told me, Man to Man, that we especially ne ded the service agreement, because - thi i a direct quote - "You know how women can be with computer ." He did not elaborate, but the implication was that a oon a a ~oman i alone with a compute r, she ha ·ome kind of ma ive hormonal surge that causes her to, I don't know; lactate on the keyboard. We did not get that ervice agreement. Nor did l get the ervice agreement for tbe cheap telephone that hardly d!d anything. In ea b case, after I said Mao" for maybe the fifth time, the salesperson backed slowly away, giving me a look of pity mixed with apprehension, as if the product unprotected by a service agreement, was going to explode at any moment. Dave Barry is a humor columnist for the Miami Herald. Write to him c/o The Miami Herald, One Herald Plaza, Miami, FL 33132. |