Show ELOPING coatless coat leis raan puts arm round tl e waist of the bailess girl wl lie over tl e dustless roads in a horseless agon tl ey whirl like a leadless bill et from gun by smokeless powder daven 1 ey fl to taste tl e less fays by endless union given 1 e only I 1 kincheon his col olesa purse affords to them tl e meane Is a tasteless meal ot boneless cod with a dish of beans tie smoke hie tol ac coless p pe and laughs a less laugh when papa trie to coa her back by wireless telegraph maurice rutherford Hut herford in I 1 s trick of the trade how in the world did you make such a success in this towne asked the first beauty doctor why I 1 here two years ago and coulden couldn t make my salt oh you dian didn t go about it the same way that I 1 did replied the second beauty doctor with a wink how was thata why as soon as I 1 arrived told the girls in town that they were too pretty to nee 1 a beauty doctor and then started for the train then they held me in town by force chicago daily bews BEFORE AND She Before you married me you used to say there gasn wasn t another wo man like me in the world he yes and now I 1 ilka to think there wasa chicago journal the dominant sex vain men are like roosters who crow and who shirk while the hens lay the egge and do all of the work and like roosters men they must cwern the rest that their sisters are only lay member at best 1 HE KNEW SOMETHING Customer Where Is your master assistant oh he s gone to get a shave sport ng blood land s sakes hiram exclaimed mrs Har dapple cider as they emerged from the ultra tony lunchroom do remove those particles of egg from feour whiskers folks will no uce it just what I 1 want them to do mandy drawled hiram as he gazed at himself in a store mirror when I 1 go into a swell place where they charge 25 cents for two agga egga I 1 want folks to know it by gum noth ing cheap about ma chicago dally news how he got the idea ma yes dearest what Is ita did you get my baby sister at the grocery 7 of course not what ever put such in idea in your head it says on the grocer s wagon families supplied judge mr boofer meditatively oer her book how true this Is mr boofer bracing himself well alaria dont 1 beep in suspense VI at Is it ab ut 11 mena ick hopeless case 0 said the asylum attendant to the in a padded who was dodging back and forth is wl it we consider cor sider a hopeless case the trouble with hima in quiren the visitor iia thinks he la continually dodging les and roller skated mil v a ikee SIGNS tiac she ever shown any sign as to whether she cares for you or pot she s making it now I 1 think A D fforence she promised to love and obey but ere a month I 1 ad flown 1 ausband dian didn t avin dare to call his soul his own cl icaco dally news not a workingman how many worl ingmen are there in this housea asked the census enumerator at the door bar s no man in dis ere house boss replied the ebony gentle man who answered the knock but dont ou live here and jus me sah my wife Is da lady of dis ere house and she does take in saha Yon kera statesman blue milk for blue people patience when the women ot abazia go into mourning they abstain from milk for eight days as its white bolor does not accord with the gloom of their minds patrice I 1 suppose it would be all right for them to drink it if it was aa blue as the milk we get over here tankers statesman LONG WAY TO SPREAD mr hippo and while 1 was speak ing to her a smile started to spread oer my countenance mr monk how long did she have to wait to see the chicago dally news it gasn wasn t necessary well said the doctor I 1 glad to see that ou ie able to be up and that you look so well but really ou should have obeyed my instructions I 1 told you to remain in bat tor three days oh that necessary the baby upset the medicine you left so I 1 only got one dose of it chicago record herald citey george I 1 dreamed of plant ing sweet peas last night hubby oh yes and 0 course you dreamed ou made me dig up the ground tor you and te way I 1 got this awful cold |