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Show WEEKLY REFLEX DAVIS NEWS JOURNAL, MAY 8, 1980 3: I GUESS you could look at it as the empty nest or emptiness, says J. Richard Connelly, director of the Gerontology Center at the University of Utah. Its the feeling of loneliness, loss of status and role identification, the What am I going to do now? Connelly discusses the Empty Nest Syndrome as part of a parenting course offered through the Division of Continuing Education. He says many women who have lived strictly for or through their children suddenly feel their usefulness is over once they hit their 40s, when actually they still have half a lifetime and to usually their prime years go. Me Vista Graduation Ceremonies Med Graduation ceremonies at Monte Vista School in Farmington will be held at school on May 14, at 7:30 p.m. Principal Lee Glad will conduct the program and speak. The keynote speaker will be Lucille Reader, member of the Davis Board of Education. THERE WILL be a special production by the faculty, students and some parents. The senior class president, Jane Kilfoyle will be in charge. Prayer will be given by Rolf Reeder and posting of the col ors will be conducted by Dan Weber. The theme of the special production will be Tomorrow with the graduates and older classes having pracitced for the past weeks, so the production will be a success. Joyce Winesburg, mother of Brenda, will be a speaker. Toni Hansen and Jame Kilfoyle will also speak as special graduate speakers. THE GRADUATING class includes Toni Hanson of North Salt Lake; Rolf Reeder of Bountiful; Jane Kilfoyle of Layton; Brenda Winesburg of Kaysville; Daniel Weber of Clearfield; Diane Wiser of Kaysville and Holly Hopper of Kaysville. After the diplomas are presented to the class there will be a special floor show and dance with the Reney Baker Band. It will be held in the specially decorated cafeteria. The graduates are all very proud of their accomplishments during the years they have been enrolled at Monte Vista. The parents also share this success with their young people, kj Renaissance Fair Slated By SHIA KAPOS Sunny weather and good crowds were the rewards to the Davis High Humanities Dept, for their annual Ren- naissance Fair held May GETTING READY for Showtime, a program presented by the Davis High DEttee and Gold Diggers Drill Teams are Becky Butler, Gold D and Denise Bates, DEtte. The program will feature high school drill teams, Jr. drill teams, a boys drill team and other dancers and singers. Some of the groups are local and some from other areas of Utah. TTie date is 'Hiursday, May 15, at 7 p.m. at the Davis High field house. Cost is $2 and $1 for students, children under 3 are free. Tickets are on sale at the school or can be bought from any of the DEttes or girls on the Gold Diggers Teams or by calling 376-975- 2. EL M Resigns BOUNTIFUL Richard 'Reid, Bountiful, the first candidate to file for the Davis County Commission seat, has officially withdrawn from the GOP race, it was announced this week. MR. REID said he resigned from the Republican commis- sion race for personal reasons. His withdrawal leaves Davis County Clipper-Refle- x Repor ter Gary Blodgett, of Bountiful, and incumbent Com. Morris F. Swapp, also of Bountiful, as the only two candidates officially in the race. DEADLINE FOR filing is 5 p.m. on May 12 at the Davis County Clerks Office, Farmington. Candidates competing for a seat on the Davis Board of Education have until June 18 to file, also at the clerks office, grb THE FAIR was held in the morning with various activities for all. Foreign language clubs sponsored food booths with food of different countries. Besides the variety of foods, there were games such as Bingo, a frisbee throwing contest and cake walk. The mood of May was also highlighted with a Maypole dance. Appearances of a fortune teller and minstrel singles also gave the fair a rennaiss-anc- e touch. HUMANITIES studerfts displayed costumes of the Renaissance period such as Geoffrey Chaucer, author of the Canterberry Tales; the wife of Bath, a 16th Century literary character and a 16th Elizabethan dress as well as many others. The fair was headed by Mary Ann Homer, Russell Cook and Tom Allen with the help of all other humanitie students. Those involved with the preparation of the fair have been students of Mrs. Vivian r humanities Beatties class this past year. two-hou- THESE JUNIORS have learned throughout the year of periods of time since ancient Assyria up to the Renaissance period. Along with the many food booths and games held on the south field of Davis High School, the students had displayed creative projects inside the school. The assignment was made in September for each student to work on a project. Quilts, printings, needlecrafts and woodworks were a few of the many displays. IN CONJUNCTION with the fair the department also held a dance later that evening. Music was by Top Hat Sound Production, along with the dancing of today there was a dance contest and floor show of old dances such as waltz and jitterbug. I feel the fair was a great success and was fun for every- one who attended, com- mented one student following the fair. - Mr. and Mrs. Frank Hare and Mrs. Golden C. Sill flew to Clarion, Pa. last week to see Mr. Hares and Mrs. Sills father, L.R. Hare who under- went surgery to correct a broken hip. He is recovering very well. Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Allgood returned home Wednesday after a short trip to Oakland, Calif. They were visiting Mrs. Allgoods parents who ape serving an LDS mission there. They made the trip, to show off their four month old baby to his grandparents. Mrs. Alice Ruby from Iowa has been in Layton visiting with her son and daughter-in-laand her new grandchild, Kuriis and Joanne Ruby and young Jason Paul Ruby. Mr. and Mrs. Russell Gailey are happy to have their daughter, Terri Swensen and her children staying with them for six weeks while Terris husband is on an overseas SAC training mission in England. Lend A Helping Charity Hand Wasatch Citizen Band Monitoring Service is helping charities along the Wasatch Front. CLUB MEMBERS are offering professional pacs of pens, four pens to a pac for a $1 donation. Pens many be obtained from any club member or call Layton Midvale Bountiful Clearfield Salt Lake City 825-915- 8; 292-295- 773-473- 1; 566-523- 3. ITS NOT really the children leaving that is so crucial, he says. Its what it makes us reflect upon. We want to hang onto them, not because its the best thing for us or for them, but because we dont know where as adults to go ourselves. Parenthood, he says, can protect women and men from the realities of who they really are. They can get wrapped up in their identification as a parent and forget theyre a per- SiaCSSRjSSaKR5aCaCCSCSK5KSK5caRSS54S5iS5K IKlninifis For ft Forsfl-Tiini- ie Mime la layer Theres no denying that, even in todays economic climate some experts say especially in these times buying a home is an excellent investment. But John 0. Dawson, broker, of Dawson Real Estate Co. says first-tim- e home buyers should ask themselves some basic questions before they go shopping. FIRST OF all, advises Mr. Dawson, prespective homeowners need to determine how much they can spend for a home, based on their income and family expenses. A key decision to make is whether you plan to live in your first home for several years. Thats because most of your mortage payments in the early years to pay the interest, not the principal. As the years pass, you build up equity in your home. And, of course, when home prices increase, as they certainly have, this apprectiation in value adds to your equity. Equity is your increasing ownership rights in the home as your mortage is reduced. When your mortage loan is paid in full, you have 100 percent equity. Its all your then, Mr. Dawson explains. son too, says Connelly. Many conversations women hold, for instance, center around their children. payment in the Bountiful NOT ONLY does the emptying nest cause the area. RELO, Mr. Dawson says, is an international, association of more than ,200 realtors who are specialists in woman to reflect upon her life and purpose, but it often comes at a crucial time. Her children are leaving at the same residential referral sales. time changes such as chronic There are offices serving more illness and the prospects of than 13,000 communities and nursing homes are occurring member firms have 30,000 with her own parents. licensed sales associates. She feels a tremendous ADMITTEDLY, convenamount of burden, Connelly tional, fixed-rat- e mortgages notes. She wants to help, yet are hard to find these days, shes being rejected by parents says Mr. Dawson, but there who still view her as a child.: are alternatives worth mvestKv And sj,e$ Sfj trying to be a gating. You might want to rent parent to her own children who with an option to buy. You are saying let go! might be able to find a home seller willing to accept a conONCE THE children leave, tract arrangement. a woman is confronted with Sometimes you can her marriage for better or assume the mortgage owned worse and that means adby the seller, and often get a justments also. mortgage requiring lower inThe husband has usually terest rates than those currentbeen wrapped up in trying to ly in force. New renegotiable provide for the family and to be rate mortgages (RRMs) should successful, while the wife has be easier to get than the old been involved in making sure form. They provide for the kids fill their obligations. changes in interest rates every Even if the woman has workthree to five years (up or ed, her husband hasnt picked counsels Mr. up the slack on the home front. down), Dawson. Shes still the worker and to give encouragement and housekeeper, the housewife and bottle washer and everyat thing else. So time has been a premium. Is there life after motherhood? Like many people who retire from jobs, the wcman who watches her children leave home may consider herself unwanted and unneeded. x . NOW, ALL of a sudden, the kids are gone and the coueach ple is left alone to face other and the marriage. Often they find they are strangers to each other, which is also part of the Empty Nest Syndrome, says Connelly. What often contributes to further alienation is that the woman has sublimated her feelings and suppressed her resentment over the years. With the kids gone and time available, past resentments begin to surface. ACCORDING TO Connelly, divorce rates increase at certain peaks in married life: the first year, the third year 5 and then about years of late-lif- e We find early marriage. divorce of those couples who cant work through the adjustments, he says. While research shows that the empty nest years can be trying ones for women, not much has been said about mens reaction to them, notes Connelly. Most research with men has been done on adjustment to retirement, which can be similar to adjustments of a urges women to seek and personhood. retiring from motherhood. Clinical observations, however, show that children have largely been the responsibility of their mothers. IVE OBSERVED that men often feel What did I mean to them? My kids are gone and I didnt even know them, says Connelly. While empty nest years can bring on depression, Connelly doesnt like to simply dwell on the bleak realities. He prefers 1 want to help her think of things to do and make the empty nest he says. a positive thing, Shes at the prime of her life. She can embrace her existence, reach for a richer and more satisfying and productive life." 22-2- woman self-wort- h . HE THEREFORE encourages women to get out, whether its through volunteer work, a job, going back to college, starting a new craft or taking up new interests. Yet many women are reluctant to change their patterns. A lot has to do with how they he says. see themselves, They see themselves as old, not attractive, as not well informed. We live in a culture where women are made to feel beautiful only a short period ef time. I want to help them feel that to grow old is to grow beautiful: it means wisdom arid experience. IF WOMEN are going to escape feeling empty and kgt when the kids go, they must usually break out on their oyiij, because there aren't a lot of people to help, says Connelly. The womens movement hasnt helped, he notes. Its tended to be a negative thing for the woman who dedicated her life to her children by making her feel apologetic and inadequate. The first step, he says, is often the most terrifying. Once women take it, however, the whole world opens up to them. "The empty nest doesnt have to signal the end. It can signal a new beginning for a woman who can now devote her time to her own life. 1 . . , Tl'jo Usvj Parli Sites (lEjjauetl Far laytan LAYTON - Citizens living to enjoy two additional new parks in the future. in Layton will be able TWO PARCELS of land have been purchased by the city of Layton for future parks. They are the Oak Forest site which is located about 2300 N. and 2200 E., and the Heather Glen site which is located at approximately 2600 N. and 2000 E. The park sites cost a total of $263,000 of which the city is paying $131,500 and Utah is paying $131,500. The money from the state was made available under a grant from the Land and Water Conservation fund. ACCORDING to Parks and Recreation Director Richard Hunt, both properties are from six to eight acres and will make very good and usable parks. No date has been set for work to start on the parks, ds Explained moderate income is one which comes within a moderate distance of covering moderate expenses. Globe, Boston A -- HE EXPLAINS the importance of equity this way: As a member of RELO Inter-Cit- y Relocation Service, our company deals extensively with families transferring to this area from other parts of the country. Many of them are corporate transferees who are required to sell a home they have elswhere and buy another here. Thats never easy, but a family which has built up equity in a home most likely can use that equity as the down School Bus Accident In Clearfield CLEARFIELD None of the 64 North Layton Jr. High School students aboard a Davis School District bus was injured last week when a compact auto struck the broadside of the bus at the intersection of 700 South and 1000 East (frontage road) in Clearfield. CLEARFIELD Police, who investigated the mishap, said the bus, driven by Leola Edwards, of Layton, was en route from the school to a Hill AFB housing area. Witnesses said the bus had stopped at the intersection and pulled onto 700 South when it was struck broadside by a small car driven by Thomas Hamacher of Roy, who was treated at Hill AFB Hospital and released. DAMAGE TO the bus was listed at $400. The car was extensively damaged, the report showed. Investigation is continuing. grb 4rk9 Special Olympics Slated The special spring Olympics in which Monte Vista students of Farmington will take part, will be held on May 9 and 10 at the Highland High School in Salt Lake City. The Olympics will be held from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. each day. ARRANGEMENTS have been made to transport the students on Friday morning to Salt Lake City where they will be hosted for a special movie at one of the theaters. Following this, they will be taken to Highland High for the Olympics parade which is scheduled for 1 p.m., after which the games will begin. THE PHYSICALLY handicapped youngsters will have a special time to compete at their own speed and abilities. The intellectually handicapped are also classified according to mental and physical abilities. Each child will have a fair chance and medals are to be given plus ribbons, so that each participant receives an award of some sign of achievement. THE QUEEN will be pre- sented from each special school: Monte Vista will have Linda Schell of Clearfield as their queen and she will be dressed as a queen should be and will receive special recognition. iThe events scheduled will be softball throw, long jump, hurdles, 200 meter dash, 50 meter dash and pentathlon.': BRENT MANGUS, Davis County School Districts only adaptive phusical education person, will be in charge of the events of the Olympics, kj - |