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Show ILLUSTRATION BY JOHN HUEHNERGARTH we GO Fear not, disheartened anglers, all fish don’t live charmed lives— some of them die laughing at fishermen! A Talk with Mr. Brook Trout N AQUALUNGand indelible ink were A necessary equipment forthis inter- view, which took place underwaterbetween the author and an elderly 2!'.pound brooktrout, Byinterviewing the fish rather than the fisherman, | sought to learn something new about the age-old battle between them (nothing worthwhile on the subject has been discovered since the efforts of Mr. Izaak Walton). The following submarine dialogue is recorded verbatim. Your Reporter: Mr. Brook Trout, what's your opinion of the new techniques being used to lure you to a nonwatery grave” Brook Trout: (smiling modestly) Well, I’ve seen every newplug. fly. and spoon developed. I have watched things that gurgle, bleed, wiggle. stagger. pop, plop, slither, and a few that just lie there—and with some amusement. | might add. Let me generalize by stating that the only one fooled by these contraptions is the purchaser. Y.R.: Has anyone. in vour opinion, recently made a contribution to the art of fishing? B.T.: One person, Rachel Carson Y.R.: Er—Johnny Carson's wife? B.T.: (fishy stare} Y.R.: (trying again) Just who, then’ B.T.: I refer to the lady who wrote the book about the pollution of our streams. She has awakened our country just in time to avert disaster: Y.R.: Not to change the subject, but would you comment about the conflicting theories of the experts on how such conditions as barometric pressure, temperature, and phase of the moon affect fishing’ B.T.: Certainly. I consider them highly important. It has been my experience that, when the barometer is low or falling, fishermen tend to get very sluggish. During a full moon, they're By BOB FOREMAN more interested in women than fish. As for temperature, well, when it gets up there, you'll find most fishermen tend to give up quickly Y.R.: Er—that wasn’t exactly what I meant. 1 was under the impression these factors had an effect on the fisi. B.T.: That’s ridiculous! Y.R.: Would vou care to reveal some facts about your early upbringing? You yourself were hatchery-reared, I believe’ B.T.: (haughtily) Yes. I come from a long line of superb breeders. Y.R.: I sensed that. Howdid your early days help prepare vou for later life? There's talk these days that young fish aren’t what they used to be—delinquencyandali that B.T.: In the good old days. we had to fend for ourselves. Today’s youngsters are all liverfed by the Government. Y.R.; Have you anything vou'd like to say about conservation efforts” B.T.: I think more should be done to reduce the snapping-turtle population. Shortening the fishing season and lowering limits aren’t half as effective as getting rid of those darn turtles would be! Y.R.: I'll make a point of bringing that up at our next conservation meeting. B.T.: Would you also throwin an appeal for making kingfishers game birds? I know the Audubon ladies will raise a ruckus, but it’s worth a try to get ‘em to declare an open season on these pests. Y.R.: I'll make a note of that. It’s interesting to learn how small a threat to your existence fishermen seem to be. B.T.: Son, chances are I’ll be trampled to death rather than hooked. Say. while you’re at that meeting, you might put in a good word forthe new Black Alder Planting Program. Y.R.: Er—what? B.T.: Black Alders are those scraggly shrubs along the bank. They hang up fishermen galore and take a lot of time away from the sport. They do more for conservation than outlawing nets did. Y.R.: In an attempt to settle the age-old controversy about fish being color-blind, would vou mind submitting to a little experiment” B.T.: Not at all. Y.R.: That's white of you. Now, can you tell me the difference between these two color slides? B.T.: The one on the left is a Wet Coachman, about No. 6 in size. It has dun-colored wings, brown hackle, plus a peacock-green herl body with pink tag Y.R.: Gracious me. Now the other, please” B.T.: Well. sir. it’s a Mickey Finn, tied sparselv for low water. Completely bucktail, of course, in the normal recipe of vellow over red over yellow with a silver-ribbed body Y.R.: Right! B.T.: At the risk of sounding presumptuous. may I suggest to your readers that when they select a Mickey Finntheyinsist on an optic eve painted at the head? While this doesn’t make the fly look any more like a minnow(who everheard of a yellow on red on vellow minnow? . It does add something of an esthetic nature Y.R.: Excellent advice. I'l] pass it on. Now one further question, Mr. Trout. Since you fish are so intelligently forearmed against the onslaughts of the fishermen. howis it that any of vou ever get caught? B.T.: Pure chance. There's been a 780 percent increase in fishing licenses in the past decade. With all those hooks in the water, some poor fish are bound to run into one Y.R.: What an exasperating sport! B.T.: To the contrary; it’s a glorious sport— but it’s indulged in by exasperating people Y.R.: Well, thank vou Mr. Trout. and good fishing—er—I mean poor fishing! Family Weekly/4 pril 26,1964 Dennis Hallinan's camera captures a high spot in anu family's vacation: when Dad brings in a catch of fish. This special issue is dedicated to your happy vacationing. LEONARD S$. DAVIDOW President and Publisher WALTER C. DREYFUS Associate Publisi« PATRICK E. O'ROURKE E.recuty i View President WILLIAM V. HUSSEY Advertising Manager ERNEST V. HEYN Editor-in-Chic/ BEN KARTMAN Exeentine Editor and Advertising Director MORTON FRANK Vice President, Publisher Relations Advertising office: 179 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, III. 60601 Editorial office: 60 E. 56th St., New York, N.Y, 10022 Business office: 1727 S. Indiana Ave., Chicago, III. 60616 © ROBERT FITZGIBBON Managing Fditor PHILLIP DYKSTRA Art Lhrector MELANIE DE PROFT Food Editor Rosalyn Abrevaya, Arden Eidell, Hal Landon, Jack Ryon: Peer J, Oppenheimer, Hollywood. 1964, PROCESSING AND BOOKS, INC., Chicago, III. All rights reserved |