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Show UINTAH BASIN RECORD 'cis jnijniiDraE THE SUNNY SIDE OF LIFE Clean Comics That Will Amuse Both Old and Young 3DEian 30E By BOODY ROGERS SPARKY WATTS WcLL, SLAP HAPPY THEfES NOTHiNG WE CAN DO BUT WAiT 'TIL THOSE FEET I TO 60 BCD 9? TO DROPPED HELP, DOC-T- TAKE PAYS TO GET BY THAT TIME A SPIDER OR SOMETHING MIGHT H EAT HIM-OH-- PIP 1 EVER ffTVENT RAYS ARE IT.' SHRINK AGAIN TLL rr-A- NP TUBE SO NO ONE CAN TURN ON THE COSMIC EAY MACHINE WITHOUT, MY CONSENT OH- -1 GONNA GET MY PANTS Off V -I- ILL. REMOVE THIS WHAT WORRIES ME IS HOW AM THAT MACHINE RAPING S! IM SHRINKl- WC6 i Place a flat dish under the and if a cigarette should fan off the tray it merely drops to the dish instead of on the tablecloth. ash-tra- y IPhiHpr TELEVISION NEWSPAPERS General Electric published a newspaper by television the other day. Fifty editors saw the demonstration. None rushed out and sold his paper, but all agreed the stunt had bewildering possibilities. For one thing, for the first time in history newspaper men may have to be well dressed and handsome. Shelled hard cooked eggs somdarken if they stand for any length of time. This discoloration can be prevented by storing the eggs in their shells in the refrig, The test of the city editor of the erator until you are ready to use future may not be whether he has a them. great nose for news but whether he has the right eyes for screening And a telegraph editor may be unable to get a job unless be has a winning personality. H- If the television newspaper Is perfected a bulb may become as important as a managing editor nd a little knob on a radio set may replace the pressroom. Whether you get your paper may depend on radio reception rather than on the newsboy. LALA PALOOZA By RUBE GOLDBERG Something Up Her Sleeve General Electric gave the demonstration in cooperation with the Albany Times Union. The printed pages came hurtling through the ozone so clearly you would have thought Sinatra was publisher. Cartoons, columns, classified ads and department store ads came out of the atmosphere, with real live models In the cloak and suit ads. Anybody present could see the possibilities; beer ads with real suds, fuel ads showing real lumps of coal and delicatessen store ads showing just how the clerk uses a razor to slice meat for those sandwiches. Television ads will bring right into your home the goat which that fellow has been trying to sell for $16 all these years. And when you see the personals you will see the actual bed. REGLAR FELLERS By GENE BYRNES Bon Voyage! If milk turns sour, make it into cottage cheese. Let it stand until it wheys, then turn it into a cheese, cloth bag and hang up to dram dry. When there is a murder mystery you will see a reporter enacting the etimes CLASSIFIED DEPARTMENT OFFICE EQUIPMENT WE BUT AND SELL Office Furniture, Files. Typewriters, Adi Dig Machines Safes Cash Registers SALT LAKE DESK EXCHANGE U West Broadway, Salt Lake City, lut. Used Cars Trailers In the Navy a floor is a deck," down-doors are "bulkheads, stairs is "below, and a cigarette is a "Camel. At least, Camel is the favorite cigarette among Navy men, as it is among men in the Army, Marines, and Coast Guard (Based on actual sales records from service mens stores.) And a carton of Camels is a favorite gift. Though there are now Post Office restrictions on packages to overseas Army men, you can still send Camels to soldiers m the U. S., and to men in the Navy,! Marines, and Coast Guard wher ever they are. Adv. crime and the editors stenographer posing as the victim, if she has the right personality for murder cases. However, we are not scared by the threat of a television press. Not many people who listen to the radio can read anyhow. And nothing can destroy the average Americans determination to sit over in a quiet comer and read his newspapers. Well, maybe theyre not reading, but its an established way of avoiding conversation. OHARE BUTCH ("Butchs lights POP Hard on Stylists I can't think of ANYTHING MORE USELESS- By J. MILLAR WATT no! but j'm afraid somebody - WILL went NO ASPIRIN can do more for yu, bo why pay more? Worldslargestsellerat 10)S 36 tablets 204 100 for only 35A Get St Joseph Aspirin. j Artificial Languages 1600, some 350 artificial i languages have been devised and proposed as an international auxi. iary tongue, but only 6, all create: in the past 65 years, have achieve: importance Esperanto, Ido, Inter lingua, Novial, Occidental and Vo lapuk. j Since J ( I out, and then he was gone. From a fellow fliers story of the death of Lieut. Com. Eddie OHare.) Then he was gone. . . . The kid who In that day When fright was in our eyes So clearly showed the wayl Tills Irish lad Who in those first dark hours Of our new war So stirred these hearts of ours I "Then he was gone. . . . This lad with deep-se- t eyes Who, when the chips were down. So terrorized far skies; ' Who in green days When none of us could tell How brave our youngsters were. Had flashed the "All is well! Beware Coughs from common colds That Hang Creomulslon On relieves promptly because It goes right to the seat of the trouble to help loosen end expel germ laden phlegm, and aid nature to soothe and heal raw, tender, inflamed bronchial mucous membranes. Tell your druggist to sell yon a bottle of Creomulslon with the understanding you must like the way It quiokly allays the cough or you are have your money back. CREOMULSION for Coughs, Chest Colds, feel do- Bronchitis Bald African Women the style among women of certain tribes in Africa to pull a of their hair from their heads an: wear huge festoons of wire as ear FI rings. ! RAISING KANE Absence Makes, Etc. By FRANK WEBB nor ee abub to Bur THy Soce ms faithful. ax kimd I DOS mav TALK Oft AWTWNCr ?DHSS IF Tney COULD TALK THeyT? Oosr SAy N llthq Time 1 . PfteesMTv DIZZY DEVICES i This "Butch OHare, Whose name could stir your soul And speed your pulse And make your past unroll! . . , "Then he was gone A red gull In the dark The bucko with the stuff The courage red and stark. ... "Then he was gone . . . This ripping, tearing ace. The silent one Who "put em In their place; y Whose feat of In wars first hour Had symbolized our guts And socking powr. flve-a-da- GVe Oft. Car ATTACH MONT i0 a veey hamov Device, ano voes Away CtATH eOVEAKy SMOGS "Then he was gone . . . The slashing, slamming guy "The Socko Kid "The King Hawk of the The kind we have, Thank God, in days of dread To take the torch For our heroic dead! sky' Peace to you, "Butch . . . There in some distant blue With all who kept our faith. The Christian and the Jew , . , Now have you joined Our hosts who knew no fear; Paul Jones and Nathan Hale And Lawrence and Revere! CROSS TOWN By Roland Coe The Leader Has he got "that winning look? That's Ike; Does he Nazi gooses cook? That's Ike; Can he jab and can be hookl Does he love to throw the bool At that paperhanging crook? That's Ike. Has he got a winning smile? Has he got a certain style? n ha "Why didn't you tell me you were wearing perfume, dear? We all thought It was phosgene I" new-mow- Yoa thought it was inch a good idea well, lets see yon convert that two hundred and forty pounds of pork from the hoot to the pantry. That's Ike; Is he slugging all the while? Thats Ike - che FE taki dire turt rein PEI and Its YOU WOMEN WHO SUFFER FROM v ! ISO! FIAiiliS If you suffer from hot flashes, weak, nervous, cranky feelings, are a bit blue at times due to the functional middle-ag- e period peculiar to women try Lydia E Pinkhams Vegetable Compound to relieve such symptoms. Taken regularly Pinkhams Compound help build up resistance agninst such distress. It helps nature I Also a fine stomachic tonid. Follow label directions. LYDIA WNU LRNKHAMS nmI COMPOUND W S- - riCtlffM For You To Foci Well ti hoar week, never svery day. T dsya stopping, ths kidney waste matter from the blood. If Bora people were aware of bow tv kid neve must constantly remove ft11 ploa fluid, exoeaa arid and other wm matter that cannot at nr In tha bl without injury to bealtn, there wouw be better understanding of vhf whole system la upect alien kidney W J 1 to function properly. Burning?, scanty or too frequent oHb t!oa aomeilmea varni that someth' I la wronf. You may Buffer nagging che, headaches, dizcmces, rheumtd pains, getting up at nights, swelling j Hhy not try Doan a Dx U$1 You bo asing a medicine recommended t' j thefun Doan over. stimulate country tion of the kidneye and help then J I flush aut poisonous waste from Wood. They contain nothing harfn'u Get Doan's today, Uee with conlideno j At ail drug store. uSH Ait to si third |