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Show Saturday, May ifts are popular with By JENNIFER LOWE Orange County Register You'd think with all the money they make, the TV anchor women showering Murphy Brown with baby gifts would roll out the silver teething rings. The sterling baby rattles. The baby gold-encruste- d spoon, But in the baby shower episode. "Today" host Katie Couric took the approach: She breast gave pump. Or meant to. '"Oh no," Couric said as Murphy Brown, played by Candice Bergen, unwrapped a pair of golf shoes. "Bryant Gumbel is at his birthday party right now unwrapping a breast pump." it" s Get out the umbrella back-to-basi- a baby-showe- season. And what seems to be in among the expectant set are gifts as sensible as Mary Poppins. When we asked mothers, they told us that lovely gifts are lovely indeed. But amid the diaper changing, the loss of sleep and the sudden sound of baby howls in your home products that make life easier are most treasured. Unsure need? what parents might "I always ask what the recipient wants," said Los Angeles author Susan Silver, whose new book, "Baby's Best!" $9.95), is a (Adams-Hal- l, guide to baby prod- ucts. "I'm amazed at how many posed to be surprises. But I'm I would much rather pragmatic someone get something they really want." Some moms-to-b- e register at baby shops, just as brides fill out registries for wedding gifts. Check to see if your gift recipient has a special store. (Or expectant mothers might think about registering to ease woes.) salesclerk also might be able to make some suggestions: ask what's been selling lately. Or, you might try stopping a mother in the aisle for suggestions. Here's what these California mothers told us they liked: Though her daughter was born 14 years ago, Cathee Himel still recalls several months of diaper service as her favorite gift. ple don't ask because gifts are sup g "It was very practical," said Himmel,42. of Newport Beach. Milly Valare, 75, a grandmother who has given lots of baby gifts, favors gift certificates from grocery stores. "I've seen a lot of babies come. And they always get lovely things, but when it gets right down to the those packages of diapers and formula are best," said Valare, of Huntington Beach. Usually she presents the certificate with a small gift, such as a bib. Expecting any day now, Tammy Kuhlendahl already has put her nitty-gritt- best peo- gift-buyin- A store y, a gift to work on her band's messes. baby-show- er mini-vacuu- m hus- parents-fo-b- G "My girlfriend gave it to me," said Kuhlendahl 25. of Fountain Valley. "She was over with her baby, and he had just eaten and there were crumbs everywhere. She a living." e Another popular gift is the pouch that allows a parent to carry his or her baby. Debra Dunne, 31, of Mission Viejo, got one at her baby shower and has since given five or six as gifts. sling-styl- My pick for this week's tup book at the Provo City I.ihrur, is most-watche- mini-serie- e, Haley could tell it. After years of separation, three childhood friends come together again in their hometown of Cambridge, Mass. When tragedy strikes, all three are forced to realize the consequences that follow from the "That's one less thing the mom would have to think about," she said. Finally, Teri McCann, 30. suggests a gift that will delight a new baby's sibling: Take the sibling out for the day. "He or she needs to feel special, too," said McCann, an Aliso Viejo mother of three. things we do for love. Love" is the title of this pelling new novel by Sue Universal Press Syndicate Long ago. in a mountainous land filled with roests and streams, a young girl and her father walked from village to village, seeking a home. They led their donkey, and now and then people they passed could hear them calling, gently, "Heart'n'Soul. hurry up now." for that was the old donkey's name. Sometimes the girl grew impatient and tugged at the lead, then gently she chided her donkey with a tsk and frown. "Heart'n'Soul." she said, "your heavy hoofs are slowing up our journey." Father and Daughter and their donkey. Heart'n'Soul, walked along slowly but surely. Out of one village they climbed, and then, up and up they moved, ascending the mountain's ridges in hay blue, descending others rimmed by the halo of fading golden sunlight. On and on they plodded, entering forests lush and humid, noisy with the sound of busy insects. Coming out of the, forests, they crossed swamps, rivers and streams. Still they walked, following a river's path across farmland where cornstalks grew up to the sun. "We'll reach the coast" said Father. "And there?" Daughter asked. Father smiled. '"There we'll reach a ship, my dearest Daughter." said he "and we will sail to another land." And so they trudged on. through thick brush, over verdant hills, under a sky blue as the bluebirds that sang to them from their perches in the paradise trees. "Those are trees of heaven," said the father, "and that is where we're traveling to." Daughter smiled, dreaming of the place she knew would be the perfect place. "We're getting closer." Father said to Daughter, and he brushed her hair out of her ey es. She smiled up at him. and on they walked. Their limbs grew tired, their clothing stuck with sweat to their skin. Their shoes collapsed. And still they walked. And then one by the sun rose high and fast. "Another sizler." said Father to Daughter. "Some days feel long," he said. They passsed into a tiny village where cats slithered across the hot pavement, seeking some shade, mosquitoes buzzed and moaned and spiders burrowed deep inside thrilling new adventure involving "Star Trek: The Next Generation." "The Devil's Heart" is a legendary object of unsurpassed power and mystery. However, its location has re- SCHOOL (Continued from Page B6) ents. "But as soon as homosexuality encroaches on the school and it's being taught as 'equal' or 'good' or as 'the ideal relationship which I'm living.' I have todraw the line." Highline F.ducation Association President Dev in Gruver blames the controversy on an attempt by "the religious right" to limit the academic freedom of teachers. Taken to its logical conclusion, he said, the movement would lead to the dismissal of gay and lesbian teachers. Gruver thinks teachers should be doing more, not less, to meet the emotional needs of gay stu- - until now. mained unknown Whoever finds it will hold power beyond all imagination. "Teaching Your Children Values" is the title of the newest book by Utah's own Linda and Richard Eyre. Believing that one of the greatest gifts you can give your children is a strong sense of personal values, the Eyres present a practical, d and waved, Heart'n'Soul brayed once, then Daughter looked up at Daughter and apologized for speaking out of turn. The people, sipping nice, cool lemonade, watched with wonder this strange procession. You see. Father was old. with withered skin and worker's hands, and now he wore no shoes at all. The men on their rockers spoke low, but Father and Daughter heard them. "Just look at that." they said "that poor old man walks like that when he could ride upon his don- African-A- merican I family activities using games, exercises and designed to teach values to kids of all aaes. value-buildin- 4 ifs; g CHILDREN: V e program month-by-mont- h key's back." At that Daughter began to think, i and soon she said, "Father, you're getting old. Why don't you climb up on Heart'n'Soul's back and Illustrated Dy j'Wan G'ililand have a ride?" "You heard the men. did you'1" Father and Daughter spent too much time listening to the opinions of asked Father, and Daughter nod- others and that is how they ended up carrying their donkey. ded. So did Heart'n'Soul. And so And so. in an instant, they they stopped a moment and the old river, took a turn, and chanced man climbed upon the donkey's upon some young folks in a field. stopped and jumped down to the back, and on they moved following The sun shone down. The temperaground, ans as they did the red dust the river's curve. tures were climbing fast. The rose and tickled their noses. They After a while they passed a young folks were feeling lazy, and sneezed. Heart'n'Soul. sneezed. whitewashed church that stood just when they saw the traveling band People heard the sneezes from by the riverbank. There the women they were amazed, and one of the miles away because sound traveled of another village gathered, spinboys called out, "Hey. everyone, far on that hot. dusty, still day. look at Heart'n'Soul looked down at the "Will look at that!" and all the sunbath-er- s you ning yarns. that." one of the women whisold the at turned to stare ground and Father saw how sad he poor so "That but not quietly. pered, sweating, panting donkey carrying seemed. And Daughter saw too. old man rides his donkey while his an old man and a young girl down a And Father began to speak. "Perpoor young daughter walks along iong dusty road. haps." he said, but Daughter nodin threadbare shoes. That's shameded before he had said another Then one of the girls, wearing a word. ful, Ithink." Bending their knees, they toes in suit and dipping-hebathing reached beneath Heart'n'Soul's And on past the church went her head and said, and a pond, shookcould body, and together they lifted him Father, Daughter all so hear, "Can you Heart'n'Souk but then Father loudly high into the air, and then they imagine treating animals that balanced him upon their tired what the of said woman thought wayv" shoulders. and he looked down at his daugh"Poor donkey" said another On they walked that way. carryter. Tiny , crystal beads of sweat o rl And then the whole group had gathered at her brow. "Sweet ing their donkey. Heart'n'Soul. stood and stared and spoke, but not Now he don't said, they passed still more people. Daughter." "why in whispers at all. "Imagine People just shook their heads and you climb up here with me0" that weight upon a tired "I heard those women." said putting all back." sighed. "What's in their minds:" creature's the people whispered. "What kind Daughter, and Heart'n'Soul nodfool carries a donkey like that?" of for had he And too. so heard and and Father ded, Daughter And no one knows if Father and Father pulled on the reins and Heart'n'Soul walked on. but pretty stopped the donkey and he reached soon Daughter turned and looked Daughter and their donkey ever out for his daughter's hand and at Father and she frowned and reached the far shores but if you but she did not had been there you might have told pulled her up to join him on the said. "Father one have to back. 's more, for Father and Daughter that perhaps thing say donkey "Now that's just fine," said Father read her mind and said. they ought to have, sometimes, igFather, and he gently kicked "Shh now." They both looked nored other people's opinion. You Heart'n'Soul's side. And they down and saw the bony back of might have told them that they Heart'n'Soul. and feeling sad and ought to consider their own were on their way again. Now pretty soon, as luck would terrible, they looked down at her Heart'n'Soul. for it was he who knew them well. have it, they came to a bend in the rough, red hooves. dents who. according to a 1986 federal study, account for 30 percent of teen suicides. "I think we have the obligation to all our students, no matter how small a minority they appear to be. to help them be drug-fre- e and be safe, individuals." Gruver said. Michael Mackey. a gay High-linHigh School student, said the "Klan-like- " arguments of some parents encourages discrimination against gays. "It's not fair," he said. "It wasn't fair to treat people with less respect, or Asian Americans. People should just learn to let people be people. Everybody has a right to do their own thing." Forty Highline parents organized quietly last fall to complain to administrators about an English teacher they said had discussed comMill- In "The Devil's Heart," by Carmen Carter, the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise takes off in a veranda. shady, "Hello there." called Father and white-columne- "For er. f IT J homosexual issues for weeks and failed to ask students to open their literature texts. Members of the parent group became incensed in February when the Highline High School student paper. The Helm, published a spread discussencountered by gay ing problems students and listed meeting places two-pag- e for gays and lesbians. The Highline Education Association drew protests after a newsletter suggested teachers tell troubled gay and lesbian students about a support group at Ruth Dykeman Youth and Family Services. More recently, parents said a talk about his batgay man's guest tle with AIDS undermined the school district's message of sexual effort to introduce homosexuality." Santie said. allows discussion of controversial issues if they relate directiy to the curriculum and all sides are presented. School publications "should present controversial issues in depth and represent a variety of viewpoints." according to the polSchool-polic- y icy. Several school board members said they support discussion of controversial issues. "What we don't want is anyone advocating a homosexual lifestyle or a particular lifestyle." said board member Ed Pina. "We don't want abnormal lifestyles advocated." Alice Hurley, the school coordinator, said she was "really sorry " about the guest abstinence. "All those things, when you add speaker, who reportedly offended them up. it looks like a concerted his audietKe by presuming the stu health-educatio- n MtL Howard Downey the Library At d s d nouncements. the rich red soil, looking for spring water. The river they crossed was hot and still. Father and Daughter walked on. They passed a group of v illagers sitting idly on their chairs upon a h television of all time. "Alex Haley's Queen" is the saga of his father's family. Opening in Ireland, the story follows Haley 's Irish grandfather to America, where his son and a strong-willeslave woman bore a daughter named Queen, Haley's grandmother. This is the story of an American family as only Alex Following opinions of others can prove burdensome By AMY FRIEDMAN "Alex Haley's Queen." the late Alex Haley in collaboration with David Stevens. Alex Haley's legacy has had as great an impact on American families as any story in the 20th century. His Pulitzer Prize winning "Roots" may rank as the most popular book of our generation as it was aiso the y swing. She lets her baby swing while she works. "It turned out to be a lifesaver. I told my husband I didn't know what I'd do without it. You have to be practical. ... You have to make B7 'Alex Haley's Queen' is top reading pick said. "This is why you need one.'" Some mothers said they give a Other parents suggest baby items, includvariety of well-babwhich are like walkie-talkie- s ing medicine, baby nail clippers monitors, between the baby's room and diaper-ras- h ointment, packed and the parents'. into a gift basket. Some stores sell kits. Why not give mom and dad a Bookstore shelves are full of break? A popular suggestion is how-t- o baby titles, which may get wrapping up a gift certificate to a overlooked in the shuffle for gifts. restaurant and offering to babysit "The Well Baby Book" (Sum- for a parents' night out. mit Books. $16 95) is a good referLinda Hopp. 49, of San Clem-entence book and something you can likes to give a gift certificate keep using, said Robin Blake. 45. of Orange, who still refers to it for a manicure and a pedicure or a when her daughter, Ariana, 4, facial. She got the idea nine years doesn't fee! well. It was the best ago when an expectant mother gift she received. complained she could no longer Another book suggested by reach her toes. mothers is "What to Expect the "I thought, I'll just give her a First Year" (Workman Publishpedicure," Hopp said. ing, $12.95) Lisa 26, of Costa Mesa Zwick, Suzanne Smith. 38. got a lot of her sister custom birth angave for a beautiful shower at things Nicholas, born in March, "but they don't help you," said the busy designer, who works out of her Huntington Beach home. Her favorite item1 An automatic - Page THE HERALD. Provo, Utah, 29, 1993 Mary Ellen Pinkham has behousecome America's No. g hold authority both as a author and as a syndicated newspaper columnist. Her latest book, "Mary Ellen's Clean House," is an information-packed guide to how to do most anything around the home. Whether you need to buy a carpet, clean a sink, do wash, 1 best-sellin- paint a wall, unclog a drain, hang a picture, remove a stain, or eliminate an odor, this book is a literal goldmine of information. If you are a golfer, or someone else in your family follows this frustrating pursuit, may we suggest a new book by Peter Jacobsen titled "Buried Lies: True Tales and Tall Stories from the PGA Tour." This hilarious book inside of pro golf by one of est players to ever game. Jacobsen has is a the world the funni- play the stories to tell about all the players from Nicklaus. to Palmer, to Faldo. and Kite. And. especially about himself. big-nam- Finally. "To Life!" by Harold Kushner is an inspiring study of the beliefs and practices of Judaism. This is an en- grossing book for practicing Jews and anyone curious about the roots of Christianity. Kush-ne- r is perhaps best known for his book. "When Bad Things ' ' Happen to Good People. d Any of the hooks may he borrowed from the Provo City Library if you have a current Provo or Orem above-mentione- library card. Other local libraries in Utah County may have them as weil. lesbian partners in San Francisco, hope a more tolerant society w;li son. keep Jordan, their from feeling outcast. Jordan (Continued from Page B6) then later, once the sex drive starts to kick in and most kids are experimenting w ith sex. more kids will become homose x ua " Gay activists see it differently. Yes. a more tolerant society would produce more openly gay teenagers and adults, said Robert Bray . spokesman for the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force. But he stressed the word "openly." saying tolerance would not make more it would only make people gay life easier for those who already are. "More would come out of the closet, because they'd be liberated." he said. "If we lived in a society where diversity was respected, then people wouldn't ble . . . I . have to live lies. " Greater acceptance of gay s also might save young l ives, not just by reducing violence directed at homosexuals but by easing the stigma of being gay. Bnay said. A 1989 study by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services found were gay and lesbian teen-agethree times as likely as heterosexual teen-ageto attempt suicide. "It's not that gays and lesbians are born w ith some innate desire to kill themselves." said Alex Clegh-or- n of Seattle, 20. She remembers well the fear and isolation of growing up lesbian in a hostile world. "The environment is what causthe environes these suicides ment of intolerance promoted by rs rs our parents, our peers, our church." she said. "It's feeling like you're a misfit." Janet Seldon and Shan Cohen. dents were promiscuous. Other speakers with AIDS gave powerful messages about the grim realities of the disease, she said. "I'm no fool." said Hurley. "I knew there would be controversy. Sometimes you have to do things that are controversial. I wish you could get some of those parents to spend some time in our high schools and in our middle schools and hear what (the students are) " talking about. of Paula Schachtel. The Helm, also expected controversy over the newspaper's articles but not a dispute that has grown over the past three months. She said the stories were intended to inform students about their gav schoolmates, not to promote hom- gay-righ- ical process. Vista. Calif., where last November's They have a model in election produced a majority of fundamentalist Christians, including one who proposed deleting all mention of homosexuality from the district's programs. No scorecard exists for measuring the religious right's political influence at the school-boarlevel. Candidates do not always make their views known Likewise, the Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund counts only eight openly gay or lesbian members of local school boards around the country , all of them in California. But gay activists look to other liberal groups to support their cause in the name of civ il rights. Because U.S. public education is structured around local control, the debate will live for years, as each community weighs its own morality in seeking a balance between the right of adults to express their sexuality and the right of children to ... well, be children. school-boar- three-memb- d er d "I wasn't aware of how many people there are who are against homosexuality." Schachtel said. "With all that's happened. I really feel for the kids who are and the kid who homosexual are in the closet who see all this gong on I can't even imagine how thev feel." THE AMFRICAN HEART MFMORIA! co-edit- osexuality The controversy has given her a new perspective. is proud of his two moms, and Seldon wants to keep it that way "Sex has nothing to do with it." she said. "What kids care about is and feeling safe and feeling loved, ' ' e ery thing stems from that. While activists have made modest political gains at the national level, the religious right's greatest success has been in grassroots organizing. Pat Robertson's Christian Coalition, claiming 250. OW members, is helping 70 local chapters in 33 states hold workshops to teach people how to get involved in the polit- OUQ TOT.RAM. LIFE American Heart ft Association Tims scae jww as a poWic s"-v- c |