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Show New Mr-r- or Same Old Me A fact of (OS ftl life I must confess: My wrinkles all Are permanent press. Betty hler 11 '3 QUIPS AND QUOTES to enjoy the good taste of ten of our cigars The nicest thing about an ego- tist: he never goes around talking about other people. Gloria Bier A woman residing in San Francisco was delighted to receive a telephone call from her teen-ag- e niece in New Jersey. After 20 minutes on the phone, the aunt sug- SW7 V 1 gested that the girl might be running up too big s bill for her parents. "Oh, don't worry about that, Aunt Mable," said the "I'm not home. I'm John Shotwell teen-age- r. baby-sitting-." 1 Prosperity: Something businessmen create for the politicians to take credit for. Lucille J. Goodyear Rounding the corner at a dead run, a small boy bumped into the neighborhood postman. "Whoa!" gasped the postman. "What's the big hurry, Johnny?" "I'm running home so my mother can spank me," panted Johnny. L L "Well," chuckled the postman, "I've ne"er known a boy who was anxious to get a spanking." "I'm not but if I don't get home before my father does, 111 get the spanking from him." Lane Olinghouse Ma.riage is an institution held together by two books cook and check. F. G. Kernan A man charged with bigamy, involving wives in both New York and Los Angeles, appeared before the judge. "How could you do such a thing?" admonished the judge sternly. "Jet aircraft, your honor," chirped the defendant proudly. William JMge Qarden Variety often a father's counsels Meet with the children's scorn. He thinks they are kernels of wisdom; The kids regard them as corn. Georgie Starbuck Galbraith How r I. Just send the coupon below together with 1 0 cigar bands from one shape of any one of these brands. Hurry! Offer expires in 30 days! Send me one dollar (Limit: one dollar with coupon) NP63400 fill it this send dollar out To get your one together with 10 coupon and just Phillies of Aroma Tips from these brands: of one bands shape any cigar Garcia y Vega Webster Tipsters Medalist Filferella. BANDWAGON USA P. 0. Box 3409 Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19122 Name (Pleosa Print) Address. City. .State- - Zip Code Offer expires in SC days. Good only with coupon, one per jamUy. Employees of Bjyuk Cigars and Bandwagon nol eligible. Void where prohibited Him: "We seem to have more trouble than anyone else in the neighborhood!" Family Weekly, February 8, 1970 |