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Show DAILY HERALD B6 Iceland in the hot seat Circumstances can change in relationships Carolyn: boyfriend, "Steve," I dated for a year. Toward the end, Steve said that while he was attracted to me, he also had a strong attraction to a certain type that I do not represent, and he proposed opening the relationship to sexual encounters with other men. This really surprised me given that, when we first met, we each stated a desire for a relationship. This differ-- . ence seemed insurmountable, so we broke up. 1 just wanted to get your thoughts on open relationships. The idea is not very appealing to me, but apparently they are not uncommon. we reviewed last time, has three city cruising around that are fueled by hydrogea Nine other cities in Europe also have small numbers of hydrogen buses, but their hydrogen systems are not as advanced as Iceland's. Iceland's unusual geology, being literally the top of the volcanic Ridge, gives them a most advantageous energy source for splitting water to make hydrb-genga- So, Dear one-on-o- T. So if everybody else jumped off a bridge, you'd have a threesome? To avoid a total collapse into hurt feelings, both partners need to think swinging is a realand even then I ly great idea' ,. ' s. Carolyn Hax The Aug. 13 issue of Science reviews Iceland's future plans, which include being completely on a hydrogen economy by 2050. The buses so far are popular, but there are yet problems to solve. The bus repair facility needs special venting so the highly reactive or explosive hydrogen gas is kept under control; the technology is still not against regular petroleum products; storing and shipping hydrogen are not fully solved problems. But the nation is determined. There is the hope also that technological advances made not only in Iceland but by the International Partnership for a Hydrogen Economy will make Tell Me About It mean, like, every day. Sometimes three times a day. I have things I need to do, or maybe I just want some time to myself to listen to music or something, but I don't ever get that anymore. I love her like a sister, but I am getting so tired of her calling all the time. How can I explain this without hurting her feelings? Tired cost-effecti- herself. Err on the side of sympathy, and assume your friend is more out of her mind with boredom than you are out of your mind with her. Next time she calls (I know, I'll be quick): "You're my best friend. I love you. You need a " life." See if she comes to your conclusion herself. And if she doesn't, you can suggest without cruelty that she lobby her parents for social outlets; clearly the home detention's not working. Nor is her approach to it. Even if she is a victim here, victims can still be resourceful. She can read, draw, compose, do yoga, knit, keep a diary, knit a diary arid this list can go on all day. Suggest away. Last thing. Even doesn't obligate you to take every last one of her calls. Say you're busy with X, but will call her tomorrow. Just make sure you do as you say. ergy resources even beyond the richness they already enjoy. The Aug. 14 issue of New Scientist reviews that, teasing us with the leader "Icelanders are flirting with disaster to drill the hottest hole ever." This plan is to drill three miles down toward the blistering heat of the Ridge. That source already heats the water seeping through the rocks from the surface and the ocean into the steam used for hearing and generating hydrogea But Science & Society for the Iceland Deep Drilling Project (IDDP) aims to drill past the usuit possible for Third World . al reservoirs of steam into a. countries to largely skip the pe-- , reservoir that has come into direct contact with magma. The troleum economy and go diintense heat and terrific presrectly to hydrogen as they ' bring their economies to higher sure turn the water into a "sulevels. The IPHE is a group of percritical fluid." Tapping it win 15 countries, including China, ytekl 10 times the energy of the normal steam vents. But it's India, Brazil and the United States, and those 15 have 85 tricky stuff to handle and no one has ever done it on this percent of the world's human sfcale. population. At present, the de, Supercritical water behaves veloping countries are in desperate need of energy; building partly like a gas, partly like a an extensive petroleum system fluid. It is also a marvelous solwhen the supply is limited vent, which means it contains . clearly makes no sense if it can significant quantities of metals and minerals. These can precipbe avoided. itate out virtually instantly But Iceland is embarking on a project to increase its own en from the water, quickly clog ic Duane Jeffery ' ging pipes and possibly generating blowouts that would be dangerous and hard to bring back into controL But the benefits of IDDP seem substantial; not only win the borehole gen- 1 i till. lui oumuiua ui mn gjr but commercial quantities of minerals as well: gold, copper, you name it. And this also wfll look at give geology a close-uthe mechanics of the Ridge, a significant benefit in itself. IDDP plans to drill to about 1.5 miles down in January. In 2006, they plan to push to 2.4 miles, and then to the final three-mil- e depth in 2007. The time between drilling will clearly be spent in building superstructure at the top to keep the whole thing in control. But this is critical for the world's energy future since other potential sites for garnering supercritical water exist in many countries: Japan, New ZealariS, Italy, Mexico and many others. Iceland is center stage, and the whole world is watching. p ic I Duane Jeffery is a professor of zoology at Brigham Young University. . Love-relate- d, ip best. Since only Steve knows his mind, you might as well assume he did his best, too, and end your Steve Another requested something that went against your principles. You said no. Yay you. flog-stopp- Dear Carolyn: My best friend just started and she being is really bored at home, so she calls me all the time. And I Mid-Atlant- ic Imagine how tired she is of don't think it's a really great idea from a health standpoint, public or emotional. Still. It's your 'bed, not mine. And it'sa surface issue here. Far deeper is Steve's reversal on being exclusive. Did he violate his principles? Maybe. Or misrepresent them to you as a way of seducing you? Another good maybe. Or did he really believe he believed in exclusivity when he first met you, only to have circumstances tap him on the shoulder and remind him kind of that he's a multiple-gu- y guy? A very promising maybe. Three may bes, three red minders: promises, be they heartfelt or hormone-crazeare never to be mistaken for guarantees. Minds change. Feelings change. Circumstances change. Early impressions mislead. You did your Wednesday, September 21 2004 home-schoole- . "Tell Me About It": tellmewashpost.com; fax: or write: "Tell Me About It," co The Washington Post, Style Plus, 1150 15th St., NW, Washington, D.C. 20071. Chat online with Carolyn each Friday at noon Eastern time, at www.washingtonpost.com. Mssingthe point in courtesy titles , I feel Etiquette Mavens' High CounManners for the plural. DEAR MISS MANNERS DEAR MISS MANNERS I am somewhat awkward in quescil, charming as we are, and 9 years old and I have a friend charmingly as you have done tioning a member of the Etithat is very forward. My so. We have long memories. quette Mavens' High Council, friend always asks to sleep Yours is not as long as you but, as I am confident that you, think. You were not around of all people, will be most unover, go places with me and when "Ms." was coined, as we my family, have snacks or eat derstanding, I must inquire can date it back to the 17th cen- over without being offered about your use of a period in first. When I teU her this is not the word "Ms." tury. I seem to recaU that when the time to do this, she pushes The fidl word was "misthe word was coined, it was tress," and it was respectable in me over and over to ask my ; mom those days. "Mrs." and "Ms." touted as not being an abbrevianyway. This gets on my nerves. We. are both abbreviations of "misation of anything, but a new have a good friendship other tress" and thus take periods; word in itself, indicating a than this problem. What would woman's freedom from marital "Miss," another derivative of be the proper way to get this the word, squeaks by without identification neither Miss one as a sort of nickname. Benor Mrs. Because the word problem to stop without hurt- : cause of unfortunate subsewas not an abbreviation, no peing her feelings? GENTLE READER Nine is not riod was required. The test quent connotations, we do not too young to learn to say "no," use "mistresses" for the plural, would be to name the longer but rather "Mesdames" or The ' and as your mother is presumform of the word abbreviated I Misses" with the surname. will "Ms." think find ably even older, she can help you by DEAR MISS MANNERS I rethat there is none. I am less ceryou. When someone refuses to tain about a plural the Ms's? cently became legaUy joined to but I wiU leave that up to take "no" for an answer, that partner of many my same-se- x does not oblige you to come up you! years. After the service, I comGENTLE READER There is a menced referring to her as my with an answer that she wfll reason that people are wary of wife. I occasionally receive like better. However many times your friend asks the comments on how it is inapproquestioning a member of the priate to refer to her as such Is same question, you should give there another word 1 should be u the same answer: "No, I'm sor- -' ry, this is not a good time." using that wfll act as a stand-i- n for the rather cumbersome And the answer to "Why not?" "woman with whom I am legal- jis also "Because this isn't a ly united"? 'good time." GENTLE READER You are supposed to keep Spouse. And please don't ask Miss this up until the other person's ; a gBr ' : . - Miss Manners .i i goes. But if you feel yours fraying, Miss Manners suggests saying, "Let's go ask my mother" so that lady can take over delivering the same statement. Feeling incorrect? your etiquette questions to Miss Manners (who is distrnucrht that aha cannot reply personally) at Jrazier Moore THE ASSOCIATED PRESS The first scene in "Lost" is almost unbearably dreadful, not just for what you see but also what you fear you might see. A bloodied young man awakens in a bamboo grove, then stumbles to the nearby ocean-froto confront a horror he shares with many: a jet crash, with pieces of the huge, doomed craft strewn across the island sand and passengers everywhere injured or crazed. The man, Jack (Matthew Fox, "Party of Five"), happens to be a doctor who makes house calls. The camera follows as he makes his heroic rounds at wholesale triage. Fortunately, in this scene and pilot throughout the two-hou- r (tonight on ABC), "Lost" never loses its way. Thanks to stylish You if you promise k to use the black or ink you'll save by writing those thank you, condolence blue-blac- and congratulations letters you owe. 'handling by J.J. Abrams '("Alias'O, it stops just short of j the grotesque in even its most extreme moments (a throbbing, whirring storm of sound effects at the crash site is as disturbing as any of the visuals). This is "Gilligan's Island," the nightmare edition, with more castaways (and squabbling) than on any two seasons of "Survivor." There's a pregnant woman, a rock star with a drug habit, a hotheaded troublemaker and many more. Jack, as the leader of this disparate, desperate band, wfll clearly have his hands full. But soon enough, he finds a helpmate in Kate (Evangeline and Lilly), who is lovely. No time yet for sparks to fly between her and Jack, but if the situation ever settles down for a moment, count on it. Kate marvels (along with the viewer) at Jack's almost superhuman composure. When she asks if he ever gets afraid, he recalls a critical moment in the operating room when a lif surgery went awry. He resigned himself to "let the fear in, let it take over, let it do its thing," Jack explains. "But only for five seconds. " That's aU I was gonna give it." That's about all the time he can give it around here. - There are medical and nutritional problems to deal with (the packs of party mix on the plane won't last long). These survivors have to figure out where they are, and try to get a message to the outside world. And, well, there's one more hitch As if bidding for "Jurassic Park" fans, "Lost" throws into the mix monstrous predators. aet 15 linoc nf toYt A lit mm a raw . 'Lost' and found: A riveting new drama on ABC nt .J Judith Martin ' Garage Sale Kit (which includes, signs, price tags, and balloons) r Call today to place your ad! 373-G45- 0 Private party. Restrictions apply. |