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Show LEHI FREE PRESS, LEHI, UTAH I f Y 1 WTe i OUR COMIC SECTION - K lUItlO -- FINNEY OF THE FORCE -- there wut a PbRE MOM T'PAY HE WU7 AM WST COMtM' BACK NOW! Tfce Clerk at the office for registry g tirtns, marriages, etc, was new to l2i Job and not rery well acquainted ith tie customary procedure. "l want a certificate" began the LATER. T il Ol him ioikc A PRiMCg-- AM' HE'LL BE HANW 'ROJkID HERS RiOULAf?. -- 70fisTff GAVE Ly A HIM ALWAYS TiLL NOT TO UBT SiCM htoi IM BUT HE'J TWS HOUSE VJiLLiiJ TO VJUR!H LOT OF I , ( All Ol IrlOUGiT IF HZ cams WHiU Yez. BS HOME KiM PO IF- - I "'He certainly wouldn't,' snapped r the young wife." tin. to mtr SA.P HE ' if-- - I Judicial Revenge Officer Tour honor, this chauffeur ran his car into th' show windy ar a millinery store. Judge What millinery store? Officer lime. De Stlckum's. Judge Discharged. That's where Number Two "Let me see," said the minister my wife buys her hats. Brooklyn who was filling oat the marriage Eagle. certificate and was uncertain as to the date, "this Is the fifth. Isn't Itr Flattering to Neither "No, sir," returned the bride "Hollywood stars are Just like any"this is only my second." body else," says an Interviewer. "It Is a question," writes L. W "whethBrooklyn Eagle. er this will be resented most by the stars or everybody else!" Boston Bat Try and Gat It Steward (on board ship) Madam, Transcript. I've attended to you as best I can, and I've supplied every want but you Bell Oat of Order still seem unsatisfied. What do you "Are there many debt collectors want now" coming to your door?" "More than I care to admit" Lady (seasick) I want the earth. ATEK1 A 7J ' HEAesS Vn LES C&3i BoiTET ARt T 1 WALKED H I WH6M HE BACK? KAPB sbIm"? J KiS fNOW Suitor Sir, your daughter has prom- to. become my wife. JscJ Ct4 Fa ier W ell, don t come to me for jynjijftflhy. You might have known something would happen to you hanging around five nights a week. Philadelphia Bulle- chil-dre- CALAMITY i would.' HEREDITY CLEARED UP "Can you define heredity for os, Johnny?" "Er, yessum. It means If your grandfather didn't have any then your father probably wouldn't have any and neither would you, prob'ly. Montreal Star. I "Wfcat you want is a birth certifi- rte," aald the clerk, absently. TitBlts Laguzine. . w x: nameT' asked the clerk. Thomas New." "!' Tardon me, I didn't quite catch It" New New. New to you Ta verjbody! New to the world!" Governor Park, of Missouri, said the other day In Jefferson City : "The Isolation Idea is getting popular. So far as onr relations with Europe are concerned many of ns feel like the young wife. "A genial old bachelor said to her: 'I asked your husband at the club last evening if he would marry yoa again, supposing he had his life to live over, and he said he certainly -- SBller. I "VVfcat I I rgr- On the Funny Hunger Hiker reo HEf?E NOT SO CERTAIN ITS UP iNALS, y, tioni THE FEATHERHEADS TTTT One Request farmer, asking for his naturalization was being papers, tne 3udge- d for ,u!"t'd by ,em "Are? you satisfied with the general called conations of this country, Mr. Olson?" . me it-- ne Judge asked. e, bat f "Yah, sure," was Olson's answer. "And does this government of ours eanint ts an suit you?" coua "Veil, yah, mostly, only Ay lak to see more rain." Toronto Globe. liif Ak fill A Swedish ! r i TO I cpiciips HE WAS SHULL- - VEPf SORRY V f W X I 'J nor. J j fectly; wonderful?" exclaimed daughier as the gramophone ground out the ast notes of the latest thing In Jazz. i "No," replied dad, "I can't say I feave, although ( once heard a col- Iteiou between a truckload of empty jnilk cans and a freight car filled m Uve Star. Bthrf J 6 WELL IP HE'S A SELF MADE 1 r VERY" a cuuTivaTcd sbuf mape- - HE C?UlT WORK. MAK- J- Girl of His Dreams t y tin UftilTt iprisi t ; A Milk Measure 1 CLild A pound of milk, please. t Dairyman Well, but milk is not p's'ied. It is measured. I Cfc.Id Then I had better take a ard, th r wU i J Times. Enquirer. MAKl- - Feast er - ; Helief F rom ftSeurifiis MR. CLARK f ME AN 2. WANTS TO SEE HOUR ABOUT IV BIS INTERNATIONAL DEAL liktes Yoa H5 SAt THAT WEtu--we AKD WHAT'S ALWAYS PUD VOU'D HIM A FFSIEMP IN rJEret D ......AND duck9-"-Montre- TMi Optimistic Thought A husband's Idea of an ideal wife Some time it may happen that a Is one who recognizes the difference woman who has achieved national between her actual needs and what success will admit that her success she thinks she needs. Cincinnati was due to her husband. Troy u "Did- -von ever hpnr nnvthlnor iT ter 3 Rivals in Raucity , VE He's For. i 5r ,; ( i dokjY OU YOU LARRY rWrif You W In Need, Indeed! Ho. Iff- - Ho! Did he say HA? that YHAT S? ri-iw- my 'J W MY ARM IS DRIVING ME CRAZY EVERY TiM6 ME" HE IS IN KfEEP i 7- OP - H All NEURITIS tby is right! 'most HE SEES 1 FiVf OR TeM DONT WORRY. JUST TAKE 2 BAYER ASPIRIN TABLETSTHmtSiPP THE PAIN N A FEW Hi I f :"( MINUTES V.Y1 r IM CATER WEU I PUT OVER THE ) CAN THANK I THE QUICK WORK OFTHAT BAYER ASPIRIN YOU SUCCESTED f PEAL I AND 1 1 ( oh.that'sV (m iJJ I ly WONPERFUL,) MR.JONES I KNEW IT I WOWKI DUCKS . Long Process "Where have you been the last four npl years"' "At college taking medicine." get well?" - ; I "And did you finally lit! . ? uoes your wife ever talk to tiea.? Not to realize Jtbinkt I'm listening. yob- - bor Hie- - Real Bayer Aspirin "Takes Bold" of Pain in Few Minutes Foo,He' jtBB - , they It; she THE ANSWER aperj Q Wwurn N MUM'S THE WORD OBEYED GARDENING Now comes amazingly quick relief from headaches, rheumatism, neuritis, neuralgia . . . the fastest safe relief, it u said, yet discovered. Those results are due to a scientific discovery by which a Bayer Aspirin Tablet begins to dissolve, or disintegrate, in the amazing space of two seconds after touching moisture. And hence to start "taking hold" of pain a few minutes after taking. The illustration of the glass, here, tells the story. A Bayer Tablet starts to disintegrate almost instantly you swallow it. And thus is ready to go to work almost instantly. When vou buv. thnurfi. km that you get the Gwiuine BAVER Aspirin. For Bayer Aspirin's quick relief always say Aspirin. -- i They say that the love of J is the root of I know I know matrif- - i es Sit, rieht 1 he 1 -t- vin& r left ion. i Jtor cry s You did I "tor-T- Ely U17 - J hen 'ses 1 f v- don't why I All in ny does a pay ALL ARRANGED I d First Actress Many and many a time, my father Implored me not to be- "Suburbanites are divided into two classes." "Dow'a that?" "Those who think they know how to raise children and those who think they know how to raise chickens." Second Actress And I suppose that's why you never did. BONEHEAD NO CROWD girl always ic H f. h " Serric. With a Smile I1" isfcuSi bonier-L- ook here, f LongiB,ani port,oD LrkerTJust Joe elv t,rf until somebody orders half, 8lr. You know we can't to out and kill half a duck. t f I lit 'Vf'1 rll; po) . His RevenCe Kave you 8 P,e rirnda ber of pla er since. bfVJo!'l',Yo,,'re ""staken, lad, my enemies. "So you think Kitty made a very suitable match." "Yes, Indeed I "Ton know what a nervous, excitable jrfrt she 'was, well she married a composer." "As lonn as there was another boarder In the same house you had ' somebody to talk to." as there were only the "Yes, but ( wo of us there was,. nobody.,. to Wifey 1 wonder why we are growing tired of each other? Hubby I haven' an MeaV. i:yS ..Wlfey Yes, maybe that Is the Drop a Bayer Tsblct in a glass of water. Note that BEFORE it touches bottom, it has started to disintegrate. What It does In this glass it does in your stomach. Hence i's last action. Doe.r Not msaM Harm the Heart Conoco Bronze Gasoline gives instant starting in the coldest weather and extra mileage, power and anti-kno- come an actress. the Trainin doesn't. I you after being cured 1 re over 200 other bills I owed antedating yours p f 1 Why, Jered T&"11 rneni-Jidn- 't I? I 3 I - - Went Too Far I cured you of loss of Mr. Monkey During a little conversation I had with the lion Just now I asked him if he was the king of beasts. Mr. Leopard And what did he say? Mr. Monkey He said he was, but he made me swear not to tell his wife he said so. miut p. WHY BAYER ASPIRIN WORKS SO FAST ck all the time . . . . . Also Conoco Germ Processed Paraffin Base Motor Oil is a real winter protection the sure penetrative ' Hidden Quart." At Red Triangle Stations . . .-- F ' |