OCR Text |
Show • THE MIDVALE JOt:JRN.AI; STOP RHEUMATIC PAINS WITH HEAT OF RED PEPPERS oinet·." ? oua Relieves Almost Instantly Friday, March 4, 1932 Good old Nature has put into red peppers a marvelous therapeutic heat that geta right down to the source of trouble and almont instantly reliev~ the pains and aches of rheumatism. stiff joints. lumbago and neuritis. Thousands have found it the one safe-guard against cheat colds, too. Now this genuine red peppers· heat is contained in an ointment that you just rub on. In leas than 3 minutes you feell'e .. Then Here Are Some Organizations You Ma~ Have Overlooked: The Society to Prevent Parent. Naming Their Offspring •'Clarence" The Society for the Prevention of Calling Sleeping Car Portera uGeorge" The Royal Order of Hard-Boiled Owls with Rubber Earo The Ancient and Honorable Order of G. W aoh. Pullero The Guild of Former Oraan Pumpen The Ancient Order of Froth Blowen The Slumbering Ground Hog Lodge The International Bar Fliea The Ba!ld-H eaded Club of America The Society of Authon Who Have BeenHi11ed The Circut Fane Auociation The Ancient and Honorable Order of Blue Goose The Six~Foot Aaaociation lief come. It ia called Rowles Red Pepper Rub. Safe. Will not hum or •tin g. Get a smanjar from your druggist. Unusual Reque1t One ot Ute strangest requests eyer made in a will is contained 1n tbo.t of Miss Rosnlle Bicknell Babcock, aged seventy, o:t Llngfield, Surrey, Eng~ land, who died last July, leaving £47,· 793. Miss Babcock d).rected her executors to ba ve the oll painting of her late father burned before her fu- neral and that no one should be allowed to copy it. •0• 0 0 • The Society of Men Who Wear Funny Hau The Hay.Fever A11ociation The Quiet Birdmen The Woodland Bardo The Caterpillar Club The Benjamin Franklino The National Society of Long Fellowo The Society of Giant Engineera The Fouilo The Cub Reporters• Auociation The Sick and Sorry Club The Sono of Wild Jacka .. eo' Club The Ship Model-Makers' Club The Whooit Club The Bean Barrel Club The Polar Bear Club The Ancient, Honorable and Myatical Order of Lapa Lapao .. Brotherly RelatioDahip Halfbrothers have one purent ID common. They are the children of two marriages ot etther mother or father. Stepbrothers have neither parent In common. If a widower with a son marries a widow who bas a son, the boys are stepbrothers. • Keep Hair Naturally Dark now keeping millions of heads young looking. Benefits the hair as it dark- ens it to the shade you want. As simple as brushing. Try it. Pay druggist 75c for a large bottle of WYETH'S SAGE & SULPHUR and just follow easy directions. An Inkling PoJly-Does your husband understand you, dearie? Molly-I think he's beginning t<>last week he opened another charge account for me. Ne!llect Your Kidneys Heed ~:~~lr:!:; ~~~;·~r.,: Bladder If bothered with bladder ir· 8 regularities; nagging backache and a tired, nervous, depressed feeling due to disordered kidney action or bladder irritation, don't delay. Users everywhere rely on Doan's Pills. Praised for more than 50 years. Recom· mended the country over. everywhere. Attributes of Pride One tlllng pride has, wblch no oth er vice that I know ot has: it Is an enemy to ltselt', and a proud man <'annot endure to see pride In another.-Feltham. Reform yourse1t' and it helps you' neighbor to reform-and ln the besl way. NEWHOUSE HOTEL All-Expense- Winter Rates ervations, when reg;ister-1 ing ask f special "A 11 Expense Rates. PLAN AJ Penon• - - - - - $7.50 Two daya, one ufa"ht--room aeeom- modationa : meals ; ga.rnge; theater tlckeU, or cabaret dance. Good week-en~ only, i''t:.•':;;" -·--:- $10.00 Two days, one night--room. aceommodaticma:; earage; dinner. breto.kfast. luncheon ; 2 thcatera. Good any time. Furth~r detalt. upon request. HOTEL NEWHOUSE Salt LAke City, Utah W.fE. Sutton c. W. Wed Relieved this Quick Way If a tab bing pains shoot across your back and cripple you, rob on good old St. Jacobs Oil. Relief comes before you can count601 ... Relief without bum· Now easy to get rid of Gray Now without using dangerous dyes you can darken gray hair naturally, quickly restore its original shade by the world's finest, safe way which is Rheumatic Pains • ing or blistering. • OME one has made the wise-crack that If two or more men meet any· where in the world and one o:t tbem is an Englishman, he will lmmedi· ately get busy and organize a club, the lnslnuatlon being, of course, that the Englishman is by nature a "joiner." Even 1f that were true. the fact remains tllnt he has little, 1t anything, on his .American cousin in this respect. For reliable statlst1cs show that there are In the United States more than 125,000 lodges or fraternal organizations which should pfesumably satisfy tbe longing of the majority of Americans tor "belonging." But that: doesn't take tnto account the innumerable t!lubs, societies, associations and other organizations and rare indeed Is the American who doesn't belong to one or more of these. .All of these, o:t course, are organized tor a •>purpose"-soclnl, political, clvlc, busine~s. sclentlflc, professional, patriotic and honorary-and those purposes nre earnestly tostered by millions ot' earnest Americans. And some o:t these earnest Americans are so interested 1n fostering tllose earnest purposes that they make ao earnest' etrort to see how many o.f them they can join-and then bn.se their claim to fame on the number o:t organizations to which they belong. Bot Jt' some aforesaid earnest American becomes just a bit' tired ot' his membership 1n clubs which have a 11 purpose," he still has an outlet tor his "joining" procllvlt'ies in some organ· izatlons which are not so purposeful. These are the ones which have sometimes been de!;itgnated as "treak and tun clubs," and It ts with this tyve of organization t'hat thls article deals. So 1.:t yon are a "joiner" and are looking :tor other club worlds to conquer, take a look at the list at the head o:t thls article and decide which one you would like to join. Ot' course, the qualltlcat1ons for some ot. them may be a bit dttncnlt tor you to meet, but if you aren't eUgible for one, you may be for another. For instance, It' you aren't a whlte person, six t'eer and one inch tall or more, you'd be almost instantly blackballed 11 you applied tor membership in the National Society ot Long Fellows or the Six-Foot assoc1atlon. The National Society o:f Long Fellows was started several years. ago by Phll E. Zimmerman ot Topeka, Knn., when he was hotel commissioner of the Sunfiower st'ate. Since that time the club has grown so rapidly that there are now several thousand members throughout the Unlted States. Some nt. the objectives of the club are ro get longer bath tubs, shirts, sox and other clothing, higher awnings, signs and ceilings, bigger seats in theaters and leg-room between t11e rows. restaurant tables that do not require the Long Fellow to bold them up with his knees and pullman berths in which they can sleep with"Out doubling up Uke a jackknife. .Among members are John Aasen of Los Angeles, Calif., who heads the list with a height ot' eight teet, nine and one-quarter inches. Next tallest fs Cllf Thompson of \VJsconsin, who ta eight feet and six inches. Three seven-footen are 0. R Wllllams ot Oklahoma and Ruth Duncan and Forest Glenn o:t Dllnols. MT. Williams is seven :feet nnd :th·e inches, Miss Duncan ts seven feet and one tnch tall, and ~ir. Glenn Is halt an ~nch taller than she. Teu-yenr~old Rob· ert' Wadlow ot· .Alton, Ill., 1s a member. Robe.tt 1s six feet and eleven inches tall. If your personal appearance doesn't qualify you tor that one, perhaps an absence of hair on your bend wlll make you a Knight of the Gleaming Skull In the Bald Head Club ot America. That club was started away back in 1900 when Paul Meade, a lawyer of New York, took a photograph o:t six bald-headed men seated on tbe steps o:t John Belden's store in Falls Village, Conn. By chance a copy ot this photograph tell lnto the hands of John Rodemeyer, a GreenWich, Conn., newspaper man. And presto l John then and there formed a club. Now it bas more than LOOO members and at e\ery annual banquet some member gives a st1rring speech on ''RaJr Tonics '\Vblch Bald-Headed Barbers Sell to Bald-Headed Boobs" or some such subject, (P. S. It you're addicted to covering your baldness with outlandish hendgeru\ then there's a place tor -you in the Society of Men who Wear Funny Hats). Ever go to the circus? "Sure!" you answer. "Go every year-don't care much about it myself, but I have to tnke the children." nut just because you're o. regulo.r attendant, it doesn't mean that yeu're e1igi1Jle for membership 1n the Circus Fans of America-not unless at some time in your juvenile career you earned you way into t'he show by carrying water for the elephant. Karl Kne Knecht, an Indlana newspaper cartoonist, who founded the C. F. A.. some five years ago, Is aulbority for the statement that many· successful men of today are proud o:t the :tact that they once served the thirsty pachyderms nnd they're enthusiastic membe..'"S ot th1s club. In a certain New York restaurant there's an unusual booth tor diners. Over the entrance of what appears to be a tent are the words "Side Show," and adorning the front are two large, gaudy c1rcus banners. One boldly announces'jNono-the \VIld Girl-She Speaks No Language -Playmates are Deadly Serpents:• AnO'ther "heralds .. La Belle Rosa-Flower of the OrientQueen of the Deserts-Favorite of Sultans." In· side the tent are painted banners, posters and photographs of circus pert'ormers and t'reaks. This side show tent is tbe luncheon meeting place ot the "P. T. Barnum Top No.1 o:t the Circus Fans ot' America.'' Each state and large clty has lts "Tent" or "Top" .named for some famous circus man, The organization is primarily tor tun, yet 1t bas a serious purpose, say its members--that 1~ to "help the circus toward bigger and better thJngs!' Fans and lovers and friends ot the clr· cus are banded together to see 1t perpetuated, and are eager that greater glory may come to the tented shows. If you missed out on the juvenile joy just mentioned, perhaps you used to pump a pipe organ. It so, your name can be spread on the roll or the GuUd of Former Organ Pumpers, nn association composed of those who, by their pledged statements, pumped a pipe organ In a church or chapel at some ttme in tbelr youth. Its principal ntm is serlous-"to perpetuate the memories of our;o decadent but honorable profession and to save for posterity some permanent evi· dence o:t the important part the pumper played in the musical and eccle81asUcnl progress of the ages." It has other alms--•'to encourage tho slnglng of the <>ld hymns at Sunday night gatherings" and "to prove tbat every successful man did not earn his first dollar selling newspapers" -but Jts primary purpose is to achieve a belated recognition. The gulld was launched ln 1926 onder the favorable auspices ot a natural dlvinlty-"'Aeolus, the Gre(lk God and Keeper of the Wlnds"-and wltb t'he slogan, ''Pump, for the Wind Is Fleeting." The first meeting was held In New York city in 1928. Officers, named after the stops on the organ, were elected. And the roster ot members now holds the ~ames of some ot' Amer· lea's foremost citizens. Will Hays, tbe czar o:t the movies, did hls pumping on a pipe organ ln SullJvan, Jnd, his blrtbpince. Be received 10 cents for his efforts, and the dime was paid him at the conclusion ot the morning church service. His mother then led him by the hand to his Sunday school class, where he placed the money 1n the usual collection. James Couzens, United States senator t'rom Mlchlgan, pumped ln the Presbyterian church at Chatham, Ont. He was paid $5 a year. Be pumped conscientiously tor two years. At the end of that time he collected the $10 he had coming, and t11fs was a part o:t the original money he Invested In stock o:t the Ford Motor company, which eventually made him one of the nation's rlchest men. The Jate Jullus Rosenwald, chairman of the board ot directors ot Sears, Roebuck & Co., was also a pumper. He labored 1n the Presbyterian church at Springfield, D1. 7 and gladly accepted the 25-cent weekly etlpend which was turned over quarterly. But 1f In your youth you didn't turn an honest penny by pumplng an organ, perhaps you did 1t Jn a prlnting offlce as a helper to t'he printer-publisher ot the home town paper. If that was far enough back, you probably "pulled" n George Washington hand press, a blt ot' backbreaking labor necessary In the old days lt' the newspaper-reading public was to be kept in· formed on tlle affairs ot tlle community. It you did this, then yOU're eligible for membership in the Ancient and Honorable Order of G. Wash. Pullers, a society founded at the suggestion ot Harry 0. 'Vebster, an old Missouri ''print," which carries on its membersl1tp rolls the name o:t a number ot' men who bave risen high In the field of journalism and who are proud to say that they got their stnrt in newspaper work at the lever of an old G. 1Vnsh.. Then there's the Cub Reporters' association, composed of men who as young journollsts sought lhe advent'Ure whlch is pot>nlarly sup· oosed to be found 1D newspaper work, found it, perhaps, and now in the midst o! busy middl• age look back fondly upon the time when they toiled under the lash of a ''Simon Legree city editor'' and dieamed tbe dream ot all cub re-porters-that of "scooping the world on a bl&' story." Anyone who has been the victim ot' horseplay, hazing, kidding and razzing or even torture by the old-time, hard-boiled, demon city editor 1a eligible for membership. In the '90s quick hangings, dough prize fighting and ~'horrible crimea'' meant hardships and toll for the cub reporter. He "hot-footed'' it around for news, bumping into all sorts ot bard and trying experiences. In the '90s barrooms were popular community centers, and crimes were jobs tor reporters to solve. Still tn tbe tleld ot jonrllallsm, there are the Fossils-old newspaper men who as boys engaged In amateur journalism and are proud of their boyish efforts. And although such a society has not yet been formed, any newsppaer man will tell you that there's a field for an organization to be known as the Association of Those Who Used to Be Newspaper Men Themselves. Are you a radlo DX-er? Do you sit up late at night "'getting" new stations over your radio, either shore wave or long wave'(. Then yon can be Initiated Into the Royal Order of Hard·Bolle4 Owls with Rubber Ears with tbe howling cere-monies which mark such an lnitlatlon. Do yon enjoy break!ng the Ice 1n a river, lake or pond and taking a bath there no matter what the weather may be? The Polar Bear club wants t·o hear from you, lt' you do. Do y'ou ever subber trub hay feber? (Ker·choo !) The Hay Fever association wUl be glad to send you a member· ship appllcatlon blank. Do you have unlimited :taith in the wooclchuek as an accurate weather prophet? So do the members of the Slumbering Ground Hog lodge, located at Quarryvllle, Pa. Organized by George W. Hensel, Jr., who is Hibernating Governor, thla lodge bas tor lts chief aim to extol the virtues ot the groundhog. which, they say, "hnl!l an tntelllgence ot a higher order than that of any other animal tram the t1ek ot' the blackberry to the elephant in the jungle" and they take an oath to udefend him, bls family and his reputation, and to guard him as he slumbers." It's not easy to get Into this lodge tor yon have to be elected by the seven patriarchs after seven years ot observation by the Defender of the Falth, the Chief Eye Rubber, the Patriarch de Luxe, the Bondless Treasurer and otber officers. But once you are elected, you ca.n join Jn the annual ceremony on February 2 around the groundhog's hole. It you believe that there•s more than one name :tor the colored boys w~ look a:tter your comfort on the pullman cars, then you should joln tbe Society tor the Prevention ot Calling Sleeping Car Porters "George." Organized by George W. Dulany, Jr., a Chicago banker, the society now has thousands of members all over the country; George Washington and George Dewey are their patron saints; George Ade is the poet laureate; George M. Cohan, the official song writer; George William, Cardinal MundeJetn, the chaplain: Georges Clemencenu was French charge d'nffnires; and George ("Babe") Ruth Is sergeant at arms. All of the :toregoing are organizations to which almost anyone might possiblY. belong. But there are also ot'hers whose membership is necessarily rather Umited to the certain professions. For Instance. you'd have to be a sallor in the United States navy 1n order to belong to the Ancient, Honorable and Mystlc Order o:t Lapa Laps, although there are many landlubbers who are eminently tltted for membership, The only qualification the prospective member must possess Is that he humbly acknowledge that he Is a poor fish. But only sailors know how to initiate candidates properly, for 1t was two sallors who founded the organization at Shanghal, China, tn 1927, and sailors are keeping the order going. You couldn't belong to the Quiet Birdmen unless you were a World war aviator nor to the Caterpillar club unless you were an aviator who had to make an emergency parachute jump to save your life, and you would be barred from membership in the Whoslt club unless you were a New York boDd salesman engaged ln selling ml!nlclpal bonds. The list ot these lntel'esting organizations could be extended Indefinitely were tt not for the fact that the author or thJs article has just received notice of a meeting ot those interested Jn forming a Society for the Prevention of Ji'ormJng More Societies and be teels obligated to leave at once to attend the meeting. lJf.) by We.ster:n Newapapar Union.) This famous oil simply draws out inflammation and pain. It Is soc>tbing, healing. For aches and pains Rheumatism, Neuritis, Lumbago, Neuralgia or Backache there's nothing so quick or sure to bring reUef. Get a small bottle of St. Jacoba Oil\,; from your droggist. ~ Hard to Catch The family was having spaghetti ror dinner, and f<>tll'-year-<>ld Ethel, after mn.king numerous vain "'at;( tempts to get hers to her mouf.d with her fork, said: "Mother, I cannot catch this spaghettl Give me something else to eat." RESTFUL SLEEP for FRETFUL, FEVERISH CHILD -With Castoria's regulation When your child tosses and <rleo out ln hfs sleep, It means he Is not comfortable. Very often the trouble Is that poisonous waste matter Is not being carried of% as It should be.. Bowels need help-mlld, gentle help -but effective. Just the kind eo. .. torla gives. Castorla is a pure vegetable preparation made specially tor children's ailments. It contains no barsh, harmful drugs. no narcotics. Don't let your child's rest-and your own-be Interrupted. A prompt dos8'1 of Castoria will urge stubbo:cn little bowels to act. Then relaxed comtort and resttol sleep I Genuine Cast<>rla always has the name : ~ CASTO RIA C. H I L 0 R EN C RY F 0 R I T Nothing New in tho World PeppereU-A.nytblng new In the pa. per? Salterlni-Naw. Same old thlnr Just happening to d!Jierent pe<>ple, that's aiL A city crowd Js nnl!orm which t'ends to make 1t Interesting, bnt a country crowd-there's where you. see individuality. DO YOU NEED A TONIC AND NERVINE? Golden, Colo.- 11Some time ago I used to take Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription whenever l would feel the need of a tonic and nervine to build me up in health and it a!ways gave me entire satisfaction, 11 said Mra. 0. · L. Hall of 506 E. 9th St. "1 only took it now and then when I would feel run• down in health and as I say it always benefited me wonderfully. I am glad to recommend this one medicine to other women who need a reliable tonic and nervine." All druggists. for free tlll!.cll~.t ad¥11!.&, wrila to Plene"• CUaJo, Da&'alo, N. Y. lb-. Dr. Pierce's Prescription • |