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Show Hilltop Times Thursday, April 24, 1997 16 Guidelines aimed at getting through teenage years Anna Freud (Sigmund's daughter) termed adolescence puberty through teenage years a time of "storm and stress" because of the dramatic upheaval of emotions that teenagers may experience. reaching adoles cence, youngsters begin to think abstractly, which means they begin to speculate and think more UDon their problems. Offer advice when appropriate or when asked for. Sometimes teenagers just want to talk without getting advice. H Respect their friends. Criticizing a friend is not a good idea, even if the friend is considered to be a bad influence. Instead of attacking a friend, ask the teenager what their opinion is. Chances are that he or she knows when a friend is a negative influence, but may not know how to untangle them selves from the relation trivialize by Janet L. Taylor Family Advocacy Treatment manager mimes ealistically and creatively. Because of this new aiyiULjr, l.(,iiu&vi j 1 begin to challenge everything and reject old boundaries and categories. In discarding old attitudes, they will start down the road to independence. Teenagers want to break away from suDervision, even though it is badly needed at this age. "The unhappiest kids in the world are those with the least parental supervision," said Bettie Youngs, author of "Helping Your Teenager Deal with Stress." "What adolescents want and need most from you is to have you take them seriously and to guide them toward a better understanding of themselves." Some guidelines on how to help t MM rl? h lull teenagers follow: B Take the time to appreciate growing and changing adolescents. Parents should spend quality time regularly with their children. Value them for who and what they are, rather for what you would like them to be. Invite teenagers to confide. Don't ESP' ship. B Encourage teenagers to invite friends when the family is home. Be friendly and not too quick to criticize. Shutting out an aspect of their world may cause them to shut out their par open-minde- Air Cond. d, $U ents from that part of their life. B Allow for mistakes, they are important. Give them privileges as you feel they can be handled. If teenagers abuse privileges, take them away and later give another chance. B When a teenager comes to the parent with a request, evaluate it before responding. If a part of the request is disagreed with, don't reject the whole idea. Let the teen know it needs to be discussed. Let the teen know the plan is being considered and that you may be willing to negotiate a solution both parties can agree upon. Then agree to disagree. The key is to let the teenager know he or she isn't being shut out so he or she isn't afraid to talk. 2,995 Cruise Control Pwr. Windows Dual Air Bags 5 Speed by Daryl Sondrup Family advocacy Program, Outreach Manager April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. This year's theme is "All Aboard for Healthier Families." The goal is to link the resources on military installations with resources in civilian communities to strengthen military families. A few guidelines to help a child in need: B Be willing to intervene if a child is being abused in public or within their homes. B If you're not completely sure, but suspect that a child is being abused, call the local police, child protective services or base Family Advocacy Office. It is better to err in favor of a child who can't fend for himself or herself. If a report is made in good faith, no legal action can be brought against the caller, even if the report is unsubstantiated. Callers can remain anonymous. B If you are aware of a family with young children who are experiencing stress from a number of sources, befriend the family to provide social support Some other information on child abuse: What is child abuse? B The National Committee of Child Abuse defines child abuse as an injury or pattern of injuries to a child that is There are four types of abuse: physical, emotional, sexual and neglect What is the extent of the problem? B In 1995, over 3 million children were reported for child abuse and neglect to child protective services in the U.S. Almost 1 million of the cases were substantiated by CPS as child maltreatment B Approximately three children a day nonac-cidenta- l. Dual Pwr. Mirrors 51732 51609 51711 51634 7 TO CHOOSE STARTING AT $8,995 $ SJqpqp UP TO 51634 TOTAL SAYINGS AVAILABLE LEASE I Ww B It is likely that many cases go unreported. Parents who grew up with abuse may abuse their children. Constant criticism or neglect of a child's emotional needs can have devastating effects on a child. How does the problem impact society? B Childhood histories of abuse and neglect are commonly reported by many adult criminals, juvenile delinquents, teenage drug addicts and prostitutes. B Adults who have been abused find it hard to develop or maintain close relationships. They may have overwhelming and unmanageable feelings of sadness, fear, and anger. Some turn to alcohol, drugs or food to cover feelings of humiliation, shame and low self esteem. They may also experience physical ailments, sexual problems and other signs of trama. B Adults who have been abused may have difficulty parenting effectively, maintain employment or build healthy interpersonal relationships. What are the costs? B It is estimated that for every $3 spent on prevention, at least $6 is saved that might have been spent on child welfare services, special education services, medical care, foster care, counseling, and housing juvenile offenders. BWhen children are not allowed to grow up into healthy adults, society experiences a tremendous loss in human potential. 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