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Show tne current utuj aim viuicm.. Nation's capital attracts two types-thril types-thril thrillseekers, America lovers The difficulty of deciding when to cross is compounded by the fact that the signals are ignored by homicidal cab drivers and by tourists who are reading the Lord's prayer while they drive. Now for the second Washington I discovered. Washington is a great place for watching American action. Everything that makes this nation what it is is crammed into one big mass of monuments, ghettoes, museums and government buildings. Washington mirrors the schizophrenic American personality. My wife and I had always heard how impressive the Lincoln Memorial is when viewed at night. So we went. And we were impressed, all right. I guess I'm just an emotional slob, but I felt a sense of awe as we climbed those marble steps and stood before that statue of a man who seems to symbolize all that is good in this nation. Hold it! It may surprise some to learn that there are at least two Washington D. C.'s. Probably there are many more, but the two that interested me most are what I call the thrillseeker's Washington and the Washington for lovers of America. Hotel and food prices to the contrary, Washington, D.C. is a city of cheap thrills. The following is a list of some of the thrills available. , - take the elevator to the top of the Washington Monument with 45 school kids. This is a masochist's delight. It is somewhat akin to being imprisoned in a medieval tower with a horde of darting, squealing rats. The price: ten cents and your sanity. - Take a taxi ride across town. For that matter, take a taxi to a destination just a few blocks away - you'll still get to see most of the town. Keystone Cops If you get the right driver you're in for a Keystone Cops ride through green lights, yellow lights, red lights. Forty-seven screams later, when your knees have turned to jelly, you will be treated to severe whiplash when the cab's drag chute opens without warning. The cost for this thrill-a-second ride? Pick any amount between $2 and $5. Taxis in Washington have no meters. They operate on a zone system. This means you wind up paying an amount exactly equal to the cost of the drinks the driver had before he picked you up. Pay whatever he asks. It's worth it just to get out of the cab. - Rent a car and drive it through town. It's more expensive but it's a thrill no one should miss. Most car rental companies in Washington attach a copy of the Lord's prayer to the map of the city. The map is free but they charge for the copy of the prayer. They know which one you will need most. Cross an intersection on foot. This sounds simple until you discover that as many as four or five different streets intersect at one point. Traffic semaphores are a psychedelic jumble of red lights and little green arrows pointing in all different directions. We were reading the Gettysburg Address, as it appears engraved on one wall of the monument, when a bus loaded with fellow Americans roared up to the monument and disgorged. These people, too, had come to be impressed, awed and moved. And they had just three minutes to do it. For three minutes flashbulbs popped, people chattered and children played tag. Then, just as suddenly, they were gone. This incident served only to deepen my sense of history. For the first time I realized how the Mormon pioneers must have felt when the crickets were gone. The average American can absorb culture with a rapidity that is almost terrifying. The National Art Gallery was full of people with miniature tape recorders pressed to their ears. The machines played a tape which lectured on twenty great masterpieces and allowed the listener to pass up lless important works which were probably just put up to cover cracks in the plaster anyway. This instant culture is the greatest thing since instant oatmeal. We wanted to avail ourselves of this electronic tour but it takes half an hour and we could only spend 20 minutes. We wanted to catch the next elevator to the top of the Washington Monument. |