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Show Illncle ffub from Punkintown sez: Dear Mister Editor: Senator Margaret Chase Smith says she's as mad as a hornet about some Idaho potatoes showing show-ing up at a Air Force base in her state of Maine. She's doubly shook up' she says, because this is the second lime it's happened, and because be-cause the base is located in Aroostook Aroos-took County, center of the Maine potato industry. If she'll look into it she'll probably prob-ably find that all the potatoes at Air Force bases in Idaho come from Maine. As long as she's been in the Guvernment she ought to know this is standard procedure in our armed forces. Our military bases in Italy git their spaghetti in cans from New York and in Alaska they probably git their Eskimo pies from Hoboken, New Jersey. The boys in the Pentagon like to keep things moving, Margaret. I see by the papers where a famous fa-mous London tailor announced in New York that cuffs on men's pants was going out of style. I got sad news fer that feller. Here in this country we're going to have cuffs on our pants even if we have to do without Geritol. I'd as soon git caught in my neighbor's hen house as to git caught on the street with no cuffs on my britches. Back when we was "'" fighting Germany and Japan, the War Production Board got away with cutting a couple inches off our shirttail but they didn't have no success in taking the cuff off our pants. I was reading yesterday where some car insurance company down in Georgia won't insure a driver that hangs rabbit tails, baby shoes, dice, and such stuff on his car. They figger that such fellers is off their rocker and ain't safe drivers. I've seer wimmen wearing hats that looked like rabbit tails, squirrel squir-rel tails, baby shoes, dice, and a vegetable garden all rolled into one. I can't see how they can logically insure one and not the other. Fer my money they can keep 'em both off the highways, then maybe I could find a parking place. I was in town the other day seeing about gitting some fertilizer fertili-zer fer my spring planting and this city feller was in there talking about planting a garden this year. City folks git all mixed up in the difference between planting a garden and working one. The difference dif-ference is about the same as between be-tween sweat and perspiration. Us farmers sweat and you city folks just perspire. The good word sweat is in mighty low esteem amongst you city gardeners. You've been masquerading it around as perspiration per-spiration so long that you think sweat is something not to be mentioned men-tioned in the presence of ladies. If this city feller ain't figgering on sweating a little on that garden there ain't no use in him planting it. Yours truly, UNCLE FUD |
