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Show June 23, 1967 COLLEGIATE WEEKLY Page 3 Master Plan for the Year 4000 The following Is an unexpur gated interview with controversial Doctor 7878X, production manager for the Seaside Campus Division of Multiversity Corporation, manufacturers of the world's most advancedComputer-Programmed Automated students and faculty. Reporter: "Doctor 7878X, can you tell us just what is the Automated Student?" 7878X: "The Automated Student is Infinitely more efficient than the obsolete flesh and blood model, draft-exempt, oblivious to tension, and best of all, emotionally unin-volved. There's just no comparison'' Reporter: '1 see. Would you care to comment on the latest advances in automated student engineering?" 7878X: 'Certainly (click). The standard stock model is a benzedrine-powered IBM 7090 computer integrated with a standard College Idiom Language Simulator (click). Take this political science major, for example. '-Poli Sci Major: ". . . (click) methodologically rigorous description of behavorial phenomena which can be user fully distinguished in a statistically meaningful and suggestively argued fashion within the context of systems analysis when (click). . . " Reporter: "Fascinating, Doctor 7878X." 7878X: "Of course (click). All of these models aretechnique-oriented. That means they nver bring problems to the closure mode." Reporter: "Closure mode?" 7878X: "The idea isn't to solve anything, just to approach it. Got it?" Reporter: "I think so." 7878X: "Over here in the Faculty Department, we're In the process of rewiring some of our earlier models. Here you see one of our renovated Sociology professors." Sociology Prof: ". . . (click) get out of Viet Nam. . . get out of Viet Nam. . . get out of Viet (click). . . " 7878X: 'Still having trouble with the academic freedom circuit on that one." Reporter: '1 see. What '-happens when you put the two together?"7878X: "When you bring the Automated Faculty Member and a group of Automated Students together, the systems combine to complete the cycle." Reporter: The cycle?" 7878X: "Why we're here. The learning cycle (click). The profs give out information, and the students give it back on exams." Reporter: "What's this one with the simulated beard?" 7878X: "Oh, that's the experimental prototype of an all purpose, all-weather, batter-proof demonstrator. We can program them to protest nearly everything (click). The attractive feature about this model is that It weighs four tons. Listen." Demonstrator: "... (click) shall not, we shall not be moved. . . we shall not, we (click). . . " Reporter: Clever. What's this one over here?" 7878X: "You mean the Automated Fraternity Man? Just dont turn him on in mixed company." Reporter: "What else is there?" 7878X: "Over in our Student Services Department, we have a complete line of Automated Deans. In fact, they're so numerous, we've set up a Rent-A -Dean Service for other college campuses for use in times of emergency (click). What's a campus crisis without a dean?" Reporter: "I see what you mean." 7878X: "Thought you would. And here we have the Automated Students' Leg Council Representative. Comes completely equipped with publicity requests and fore and aft power scoops." Reporter: "Power scoops?" 7878X: "For throwing sand. And the last one over there is the Automated Newspaper Editor. Stand back. He's programmed to offend everyone." Reporter: "All very impressive." 7878X: "Thank you (click). We're very proud of all our models. They're custom-fitted with the closest thing to an open mind we've ever produced." Reporter: "Thank you, Doctor 7878X." 7878X: "You're welcome (click). And come again. This. . . is. . .a. . . recording." C30LLIDAV RESORT Girls Swim Free Friday night after 6:00 12 price for girls with escort and in groups of 15 or more. Pleasant View - 782-9900 Self Concept Report Professor Publishes Research Paper A report on self-concepts of welfare recipient written by a Weber State College faculty member will be published in a national education during July. Dr. Gary L. Carson's compari-tive research report will be published in the forthcoming issue of Personnel and Guidance Journal, a magazine of the American Personnel and College Association. Dr. Carson is assistant professor of psychology at Weber State. The report answers the question. "do persons receiving welfare feel differently about themselves and others than do persons who are not receiving welfare?" Dr. Carson said the study compared clients from the Division of Vocational Rehabilitation receiving welfare with a group of college students. This is a second in a series of research papers written by Dr. Carson on DVR clients. Last January, the Journal published a report of his research into the same general area, which compared DVR groups receiving welfare. The assistant psychology professor joined the WSC faculty in 1965, after receiving his Ph.D degree from Utah State University. Dr. Carson received his master's and bachelor's degrees from Brigham Young University. 1 fry DEE BARBER Excellent Haircuts & the finest in service 2417 Harrison Blvd. 393-8214 I AT UTAH HAND LAUNDRY & CLEANING Alt FINE LAUNDRY HAND FINISHED WE SPECIALIZE IN Shirts FREE PICK-UP & DELIVERY , Lace Curtaifis Call 394-5031 Lace Tablecloths 2475 Lincoln Ave. - Ogden Draperies Gary Carson Country Club Theatre (The Family Showhouse) "Hombre" Paul Newman Technicolor Shows 7-9 Fri.-Sat. Sun.-Thur. 8 p.m. Weber College students WELCOME Adults SI. 25 - Students with C.C. cards $1.00 3930 Washington Blvd. 393-5864 SPECIAL IMr. Leo & Staff of 5 Experienced : Operators to Serve You. ! 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