Show novelized from the comedy of the same name by illustrated rupert I 1 efrom el I 1 I 1 aly hushes by beu y W itu by H K n co 12 SYNOPSIS aleut harry mallory is ordered to the philippines he and marjorie newton decide to elope but wreck of taxicab prevents their seeing minister on the way to the train transcontinental train la taking on passengers porter has a lively time with an and ira lathrop a hankee business man the elopers have an exciting time getting to the train little wellington bound for reno to get a divorce boards train in maudlin condition later mrs appears she is also bound for reno with earne object likewise mrs sammy whitcomb latter blames mrs tor her troubles classmates of mallory decorate bridal berth rev and mrs temple start on a vacation they decide to cut loose and temple removes evidence of his calling marjorie decides to let mallory proceed alone but train starts while they are lost in farewell gers loin mallory s classmates in giving couple wedding hazing maglorie Mar lorie Is als ira latnrop woman hating bachelor discovers an old sweetheart anne gattle a fellow passenger mallory vainly hunts tor a preacher among the passengers mrs wellington hears little jimmies voice later she meets mrs whitcomb mallory reports to marjorie his allure to find a preacher they decide to pretend a quarrel and mallory finds a vacant berth mrs discovers wellington on the train mallory again makes an unsuccessful hunt for a preacher dr temple poses aa a physician CHAPTER continued dr temple stared after him but the gambler stared at dr temple with a homage so you re one of us be said and seizing the old mans limp hand shook it heartily I 1 got to slip it to you your makeup make up Is great you nearly had me for a come on great and then he sauntered out leaving j the clergy mans beia swimming dr temple turned to mallory tor alons but mallory only waved him anav he was not quite convinced himself he was convinced only that whatever else anybody might be nobody apparently desired to be a clergyman in these degenerate days the conductor returned and threw into dr temple the glare of two basil isk eyes the old man put out a beseeching see ching band and began my good man you do me a grave injustice the conductor snapped back you say a word to me and do you worse than that and it I 1 spot you with a pack of cards in your hand again tie you to the cow ketcher then be marched off again the doctor tell back into a chair trying to figure it out then ashton and fos alck and little wellington and wedgewood strolled in and dropping into chairs ordered drinks before the doctor could ask anybody to ex plain was launched on a story his mind was a suitcase full of abec dotes mostly of the smoking room order wherever three or four men are gathered together they rapidly organ ize a clearing house of off color stories the boctor listened in spite of him self and in spite of himself he was amused tor stories that would be stupid it they were decent take on a certain verve and thrill from their very the dear old clergyman felt that it would be priggish to take night but be could not make the corners of his mouth behave strange of the lips and little steamy escapes of giggle jets disturbed him and when ashton who was a practiced beur finished a adventure with the epilogue and the next morning they were at niagara falls the old doctor was helpless with laugh ter some superior force the beyll no doubt fairly shook him with glee oh teats bully he shrieked I 1 haven t beard a story like that tor ages why where have you been dr temple asked ashton who could not imagine where a man could have concealed himself stories dut he laughed loudest of all when the doctor answered you see I 1 live in they dont tell me stories like that they who said fosdeck why my pa my patients the doctor explained and laughed so hard that be forgot to feel guilty laughed so hard that his wife in the next room heard him and giggled to mrs whit comb listen to dear walter he chasn t laughed like that since he was a a medical student then she buried her face guiltily in a book it good dr temple demanded wiping his streaming eyes and nudging the solemn faced english man who understood bis own nation s humor but had not yet learned the yankee quirks wedgewood made a hollow effort at laughter and answered extremely very droll out what I 1 dont quite beet was why the porter said the others drowned him in a roar of laugh ter but ashton was angry why you blamed tool where the joke came in dont you see aba bride groom said to the bride then he lowered his voice and diagramed the story on his fingers mrs temple was etall shaking with sympathetic laughter never dreaming what her husband was laughing at she turned to mrs whitcomb but mrs whitcomb was still glaring at airs wellington who was still writ ing with flying fingers and underscore ing every other word some people beem to think they own the train mrs whitcomb raged that creature has been at the writ ing desk an hour the worst of it Is I 1 m sure she s writing to my bus band mrs temple looked shocked but an other peal ot laughter came through tho partition between the male and te malo sections sect lons or the car and she beamed again then mrs wellington finished her letter glanced it over ad diessel an envelope sealed and stamped it with a deliberation that maddened mrs whitcomb when at last ehe rose mrs was in the seat almost before mrs welling ton was out of it mrs wellington paused at another wave of laughter from the men a room she commented petulantly what good times men have they ve formed a club in ebore al ready we women can only sit and bate each other why I 1 dont hate anybody do you mrs temple exclaimed look ing up from the novel she bad found on the book shelves mrs welling ton dropped into the next chair on a long railroad journey I 1 hate everybody don t you hate long journeys its the first I 1 ever took mrs temple apologized radiantly and I 1 m having the what my oldest boy would call the time of my life and dear walter such goings on for him A few minutes ago I 1 strolled by the door and I 1 saw him playing cards with a stranger and smoking and drinking too all at once boys will be boys said mrs wll lington but for dr temple of all people why a doctor its a shame the way men have everything think of it a special smoking room and women have no place to take a puff except on the sly mrs temple stared at her in awe the woman in this book smokes perfumed things all women smoke nowadays said mrs wellington carelessly dont you the politest thing mrs temple could think of in answer was not yet really said mrs wellington don t you like tobacco I 1 never tried it its time you did I 1 smoke cigars myself mrs temple almost collapsed at this double shock cl cigars yea cigarettes are too strong tor m will you try one of my pets mrs temple was about to express her repugnance at the thought but mrs wellington thrust before her a portfolio in which nestled such dainty shakea of such a warm and winsome brown that mrs temple paused to stare and like mother eve found the fruit of knowledge too interesting once seen to reject with scorn she hung over the cigar case in hesitant excitement one moment too long then she said in a trembling voice I 1 I 1 should like to try once just to see what its like but there s no place mrs wellington felt that she had already made a proselyte to her own beloved vice and she rushed her victim to the precipice there s the ob atlon platform my dear come on out mrs temple was shivering with dismay at the dreadful deed what would they say in what do you care be a sport your husband smokes it its right tor him why not tor you mrs temple set her teeth and crossed the rubicon with a resolute 1 I will mrs wellington led the timid neophyte along the wavering floor of the car and flung back the door of the observation car she found ira lath rop holding anne cattle s band and evidently explaining something of great importance for their heads were very close together they rose and with abashed faces and confused contused cont used of half swallowed explanations left the platform to mrs wel langton and her new pupil shortly afterward little wellington grew restive and set out tor a brief constitutional and a breath of air he carried a siphon to which he had become greatly attached and made heavy going for the observation room but reached the door in fairly good order lie swung it open and brought in with it the pale and wavering ghost of mrs temple who had been leaning against it for much need ed support wellington waa stupefied to observe smoke pouring round mrs temples form and he resolved to perform a great lifesaving life saving feat ho decided that the poor little woman was on fire and he poised the siphon like a fire extinguisher with the noble intention of putting her out he pressed the handle and a stream of vachy shot from the nozzle fortunately his aim was so very wobbly that none of the extinguisher touched mrs temple wellington was about to play the siphon at her again when he saw her tako from her lips a toy cigar and emit ft stream of cough shaken smoke the poor little experimentalist was too wretched to notice even BO largo a menace aa wellington she threw the cigar away and gasped I 1 think I 1 ve had enough from the platform came a voice very well known to little it said like the second one bet ter kilifi kil iii mrs temple shuddered at alie thought but wellington drew hlusek up majestically and called out like second ono better eh 1 suppo zhe its the same way with husband sh then he stalked back to the smote ing room feeling that he had anniel his wife but knowing from ex per lence that she always had a comeback he knew it would be good but he was afraid to hear it he rolled into the smoking room and sprawling across doctor temples shoulders dragged him from the midst of a highly improper story with alarming news doc your wife looks kind 0 seedy better go to her at once dr temple leaped to his feet and ran to bis wife s aid he found her a dismal ashen sight sally what on earth alls you been oking she coughed the world deemed to be crashing round dr temples head he could only gurgle sally mrs temple drew herself up with weak defiance well I 1 saw you playing cards and drinking in the presence of such innocent deviltry he could only smile aren t we having an exciting vacation but to think of you smoking and a cigar she tossed her bead in pride and it make me sick much she clutched a chair he tried to support her he could not help pondering what would they say in alp sl fantl who cares ehe laughed 1 I I 1 wish the old train wouldn t rock so 1 I ive smoked too much too said dr temple with perfect truth but mrs temple remembering that long glass she had seen narrowed her eyes at him are you sure it was the smoke sally he cried in abject horror at her implied suspicion then she turned a pale green ob I 1 feel such a qualm in your conscience sally no not in my conscience I 1 think go back to my berth and lie down let me help you mother and darby and joan hurried along the corridor crowding it as they were crowding their vacation with belated experience CHAPTER foiled it was late in the forenoon before the train came to the end of its iron furrow across that fertile space between two of the world s greatest riv ers which the indians called iowa nobody knows exactly why in con with the palisades of the mississippi the missouri twists like a great brown dragon wallowing in congenial mud the water itself as bob bur dette said Is so muddy that the wind blowing across it raises a cloud of dust A sonorous bridge led the way into nebraska and the train came to a halt at amaba mallory and marjorie got out to stretch their legs and their dog it they bad only known that the train was to stop there the quarter of an hour and it they bad only known some preacher there and had had him to the station the ceremony could have been consummated then and there the horizon was fairly saw toothed with church spires there were tr eachers preachers everywhere and not a dominie to do their deed after they had strolled up and down the platform and up and down and up and down till they were tain of their cramped quarters again mar jorie suddenly dug her nails into mal lory s arm I 1 honey look look honey looked and there before their very eyes stood as clerical a looking person as ever announced a strawberry festival mallory stared and stared till mar jorie said you see its a preacher a preacher it looks like one was as far as mallory would commit himself and he was turning away he had about come to the belief that anything that looked like a parson was something else but marjorie whirled him round again with a shrill whisper to listen and he overheard in tones addicted to the pulpit yes deacon I 1 trust that the bar vest will be plentiful at my new church it grieves me to leave the dear brothers and sisters in the lord tn omaha but I 1 felt called to wider pastures TO CONTINUED |