Show G D OD DANGEROUS LINE OF TALK mother I 1 wish you would rit men tion dishwashing when george la is call ing on me why not indeed I 1 don dont t like it it sounds corn com mon common eh we have to eat don t e of course and george knows we eat and use dishes that s very true and george also knows that dishes have to be washed therefore somebody has to wash them but mother what nowa it if you keep on talking about it george may discover that you make father wipe them and he may think the same thing Is coming to him it if he should propose to me time for patriotism the organist was not lacking in patriotism yet he rebelled when r requested to play the star spangled banner at a wedding it Is not appropriate said he ain aint t it said the brides father for this wedding it Is the most ap prop thing you can play cut all the rest of the program if you like but stick to that I 1 had the hardest kind of a fight to keep belle s mother from rn crying her off to a foreigner between belle delle and me we won out tor for an american and it if this isn it the time for the star span aled banner danner I 1 id d like to know what Is STINGY she he ile a very close he yes he reminds me of an ex pensive umbrella she how so soa he ile he a a tight role too young to be thrifty oh george baby a had an awful time instead of dropping those pen nies riles you gave him in the tin bank he dropped them down Us his throat all the neighbors came over and dr do eem sem and dr drastic were here and you never saw such excitement what do you suppose made him do it ur why I 1 suppose he preferred bu hu man interest to bank interest A dreadful shock the waiter bowed and sweetly smiled juat just at the proper time but soon his look was rather wild he ile only got a dime cooks day off mistress finding er cook s young man in the kitchen what are you doing here and where la is lena young man its it s her tay lay t ay out ashes she a gone to town Mistress Well and you young man oh I 1 thought id stay at home taking no chances A pittsburg man visiting in youngs town had to drop a note to his eapher what Is the proper way to address a young lady he asked his host would you say my dear miss dear miss or what 7 just address her as you would in the office advised trie friend oh that would never do the vis aitor exclaimed suppose my wife should get the lettera way to handle them the divorce court was grinding all ladies who married on a bet or adare a dare or for a joke will band up announced the clerk they lined up your applications are denied now the regular cases will be heard the main one what do you think of the possible cuts in beet beef there Is only one cut in meat which concerns me just now what is it the way it has cut my tance tee A misnomer I 1 understand your wife is financial ly interested in your business 7 yes A silent partner I 1 suppose well er that s what she calls herself proof to the tont contrary I 1 understand a number of women hace bace learned learned to smoke cigars said aid the frivolous observer 1 I 1 dont don t believe it replied mr the kind of cigars women buy tuy nobody could smoke to appropriate va first boarder after supper great heavens this Is the second time to day that weve had sausage second boarder that a all right this Is ground groundhog hog day it ringing the bell this rati er clever little thought we captured on the wing A pretta girl la Is called a belle because ashes she s maid to ring elizabeth knew uncle jack who was visiting them tor for the christmas holidays from the west wished to talk to elizabeth s fa ther at his office lie could not find the telephone directory and thus ap pealed to three year old elizabeth for or information regarding the telephone number elizabeth what does mamma ask for when she talks to daddy at his officer he inquired elizabeth was wise tor for her days money she lisped resentment what advice would mould you give a man who said he was afraid he was developing ve symptoms of kleptomania asked the physician you ought to send him to me replied the lawyer the manner in which medical experts are taking cases that properly belong to the legal profession Is going to cause some kind of an ethical clash sooner or 01 later courteous appreciation I 1 don it see why Bl iggins goes out 14 and buys his wife expensive presents every time she refuses to speak to him H m mused miss cayenne don t you think the man ought to do something to show his gratitude A LITTLE WOMAN tr little girl I 1 want to get a mitten it if it don dont t cost too much shopkeeper oh ohl you mean a pair 4 of mittens don dont t you my child little girl no only just one one suitable tor for a boy goin to propose an be rejected his own words Is rigby a man of culture 7 9 oh yes indeed you just ought to hear bear him say I 1 m strong tor for music and the drammer the test what makes you think he s got money jj well they t prove by his hi books where the money went not hard do you expect me to be in two places at that a not hard if you were a new ew york fugitive from justice you could easily be in 20 going up real estate teok took sadden jump la in ur neighborhood yesterday what made it rise A gas pipe in the street bi blew ew up the honest man are ou looking for ivora no sir I 1 m looking for money but I 1 in willing to work because that a the only way I 1 car o 0 get it faithful trat bedbug has no ng gee he a just a poor d mb a ob you can bet bour con eon that I 1 e is I 1 always on the job it oft n turns out that way twenty five years ago people fie had a ngul shed a air ir ji ind and now look at him yes now look at him poor old ip still be he has a son who la is a it sophomore i r what of that I 1 the feon eon seems to th ehni nt his father 9 di distinguished tele leir J |