Show R COTTAGE CORNER The Cottage Center n. n n An eminent university professor a recovering alcoholic prefaced his public addresses by saying I am an do alcoholic you know what's the matter with you We tend to forget that most people have problems They are ire less evident and perhaps less serious than alcoholism Past prejudices and ignorance have downgraded the alcoholic to the extent that he is s not always thought of as human There are patterns of oC compulsive behavior that are socially acceptable Alcoholism is not Let me illustrate Following its annual golf tournament tour a country club held an awards party The chairman presiding made much of the winners winner's dedication to the game lie He jokingly noted that the winning doctor had earned his award by stealing every spare moment he could from family and duties to acquire his skills-a skills typical golf addict lie He had even delayed a patients patient's labor to finish a round of golf I Standing nearby an unpleasantly plump lady helped herself generously from each tray of food that came her way Beside her a man helped himself as regularly from each tray of drinks that came his way The lady finally turned to him and said Do you know sir that you are getting drunk A little later she said Sir you are drunk Finally she lashed out You are disgustingly drunk The man took each remark with a whimsical smirk but the biting contempt contempt con con- tempt of oC her last thrust got to replied in kind saying Maam yf youre you're re fat CaU A pause then You are disgustingly fat After a few seconds hesitation looking her in the eye he added his last barb In the morning I will be sober but you will still be fat faU I II Excessive golf and eating are socially excessive acceptable-excessive drinking is criticized Although heavy drinking is acceptable in some settings the alcoholics alcoholic's rejection goes he further-he is ostracized even drinkers Alcoholism has physical emotional and social components The physical aspects are self-evident self the inability to eat the shakes sweats gags the puking the withdrawal symptoms and andall andall andall all the others The alcoholic progressively displays IT many serious emotional and behavioral symptoms However for the victim the social implications are often paramount Many alcoholics and those about them find the social implications more difficult difficult dif to surmount than the physical and emotional factors When the alcoholic recognizes that his kind of drinking is different primarily because of social implications implications im he feels intense shame and often goes underground Though willing to acknowledge having a drinking problem he cannot envisage himself as an alcoholic The stigma of the skid row bum hangs over his head It forces him to defend his mate dignity and any remaining vestiges of status with family and associates He uses other acceptable ills to cover up his withdrawals Fathers disown sons and daughters doctors refuse to care for their wives employers terminate key associates associates- rather than allow alcoholism to infringe on their lives Social attitudes prevent spouses and families from seeking guidance for their alcoholic member The alcoholics alcoholic's problems are further intensified by the very attributes with which he is endowed He is rarely phlegmatic-on phlegmatic the contrary he is an extremist and anda a perfectionist He is a driver who makes intense demands upon himself and others He wants everything now not tomorrow My own experience e suggests that most if not all alcoholics are idealists They display a deep sensitivity A tune a passage from something read some sentimental triggers incident deep emotion Because of this idealism the alcoholic is at war with himself and at odds odds with the world Well theres there's much much more of course but I haven't the space for it God bless you and keep you Sam Peterson Reprinted from Utah Alcoholism Foundation new newsletter letter |