Show THE MARRIED LIFE OF HELEN AND WARREN I Warrens Warren's arren s Sunday Night Orgy Ordy of Soft Clams Is Followed Ly hy Acute Indi Indigestion estion I By MABEL MEL HERBERT HRBERT URNER Creator of the te Helen and Warren Characters r Copyright 1921 by Mabel rabel Herbert Harper Haer is continuation of Their r This series i a t Married Maried Life Lie produced for four years year by Mabel Herbert Urner The Married Life Lie of Helen and Warren Waren appearing exclusively in i this thi paper is the only ony series now being written mitten by Mabel MabelI Herbert Umer I Herber f But t. t dear dea theres there's all al that cold la lamb b and id nd salad saiad sad persisted Helen And Ad Ill I'll Il open a a can cn of ot peaches for that tat sponge c cake she made yesterday k f Nothing doing grumped Warren with a a yaWing yawning stretch after his Sunday afternoon nap I feel teel like a real meal Lets Let's go to that chop house Mumford Mumford told d us about abt We can c go Thursday Thursday its Thursday Its It's her after after- ater- ater i I noon off Dear Dea we had such sch a late dint din din- t iner laser We wont won't want much tonight tonight- and Its It's so disagreeable out t topped Stopped raining hasn't it He strode stroe topped Il over to the library window Got to toI I dress Well Wel get busy bus ignoring her arguments arguments ar ar- ar- ar for a ahome home supper 4 And theres there's a can cn of those thos spiced sardines sardines sar- sar sr- sr t dines nes as a a last lat appeal appel t Now ow were we're going out I tell tel you ou Stop your pour stalling and ad get ready rady Dont Don't tl after 6 dawdle its dawdle Its It's now In her own room Helen dressed with wih reluctant haste hate It I seemed such a waste t to spend five or or six dollars dolar for a Sunday iL evening supper when supper when Cora Cor had left lef L i aY all an ready to put on t the bl table B Oh Ph yes Ill I'll Il feed you before we go impatiently as Pussy Purr Pr Mew anticipating anticipating antici antici- being left lef alone set up an Insistent insistent insist Insist- ent eat mew for her supper You never think of anything but food fod Ither either of you glancing at Warrens Warren's Waren's photograph brushes that stood sto back of her silver siver Dressed she he followed Pussy Purr Pr Mews Mew's ew's lead lea to the kitchen Having cut a sliver sIver from the cold lamb she replaced the joint in the icebox There were those carrots and peas she could have creamed those And Ad that rice ric pudding I from last lat night night night-It it would be sour by to toI tomorrow to- to morrow I you Up to out here demanded demanded de de- de- de Warren from the te doorway Thought I told you we were going o out outI t tI I was feeding Pussy Purr Pur Mew re resentfully re- re Just look lok In this icebox Theres There's enough for two suppers supper yet suppers yet et you Insist on going to some expensive expensive- expense Now ow that's about abt enough from front you OU Clamp Chimp on your lid ld and come core along Were Where is this place Are you sure Its It's is i's open on Sunday anouse Helen when they tey came caine ce out into the Chill windy dusk duk r Well el take a chance Mumford says sas its it's Is I's A l. I A-I They make mate a a specialty of sea seafood se food tood Best soft clams In New York A minute fifteen minute ride ride- rde in the subway brought them to a downtown wholesale district now closed cosed and deserted Why dear theres there's nothing open around here viewing the great geat black show windows lit lt only ony by the reflected street lamps Its ts the next street Come on turnIng turn turn- tur- tur turIng Ing lag a corner corer Ah Ah see those lights down there Told you it was a a good place I Look Lok at those cars c. c the studded light studded sign sig stood half a dozen motors the only vehicles in inthe inthe inthe the dim silent street Warren Warn yielding his hat and cano cane cne to the check boy they entered a a large room rom ablaze with wit 1 I an d clamorous with a deafening din Every Ever table was taken their first swift glance revealed not a vacant seat Two To sir a brisk head hea waiter hurried hur hur- hurI I sled ried red up Right this way I I He led them back to a most undesirable 1 table near a a swinging door through I which rushed a steady stream of perspiring perspiring per per- pr- pr waiters walters This the best you can cn do frowned frowne Warren Warrn Sorry Sor sir but were we're crowded tonight tonight If I you care cre to wait walt wait Helen knew that Warren never waited for a a. table If I he could not get what he wanted he invariably stalked out But this was the only place open In Inthe inthe inthe the neighborhood and that fact tact had a a chastening effect effet Well Wel mat make a this ts do as he sat st down Have ave this mess mes cleared off of Right away sir si summoning an omnibus omnibus omni omni- bus bu reset to-reset the te table Dear its it's stifling There isn't a bit bitof bitof bitof of air and air arand and the noise Is awful awful I But they certainly do the business glancing about got to serve sere good god food to get this crowd way down here on a Sunday night you ask them to open a window window window win win- dow or a ventilator ventilator-or r or something I But Warren was already intent upon the menu Steamed soft sor clams clams that's that's what you want wat to order here Well We'll Wel have some soup first how first how how about abut chicken Oh no dear der lets let's not have soup economically ly We e had such a a. late dinner dinner din din- ner ncr and those thoe dams clams cas are so rich That's Tats Tat's all well we'll wel need al need Not by a long shot Tm rm Im I'm hungry Now lets let's see what see what vegetable Your order been taken sir si a a waiter walter bustled busted up Not yet yet Well We'll Wel have two chicken and some of those soft sor claims indicating indicting indi indi- eating cating the special at the te top of the menu How about your asparagus Very Ver fine sir With Hollandaise or butter sauce hollandaise And some tomato tomato salad salad Want them quartered quartered not not not sliced With an effort efort Helen kept back her ber protest at this needless extravagance She had learned that any attempt to re restrain restrain restrain re- re strain Warrens Warren's Waren's gastronomic dissipations only exasperated him hm to further furher expendi expendi- tures A dollar dolar and a quarter a a portion porton for forI soft clams clas Dear Dea that's exorbitant I thought restaurants were coming down dow I That Is pretty stiff stiff but but but It i doesn't seem to phase this bunch bunch Oh its it's is i's so s noisy and glary why glary gar wh why dont don't they shade shae these lights I Now dont don't start kicking Walt Wait till ti I we wo get the grub grub that's gub that's the attraction here Ah here we are as the waiter water brought on a silver siver tureen Helen had to admit that the soup was wa delicious It was w thick with gluey and cubes cubs of ot chicken mostly white meat Then came the tho clams two clams two cams two heaping napkin covered platters two saucers of melted mele butter buter and two cups of the te clam juice smoking hot Oh dear dea what a waste wate One portion would have havo been plenty plent H Not much I can rn put away all al of mine mine Then extricating one from its shell shel he dipped it in the te melted mele butter Jove those thos are the real rea thing But they're so rich I wouldn't use too much of that butter sauce Youve You've muc just got over one spell of ot Indigestion ston Stop your croaking and pitch in In Best things you ever ate ate They were deliciously fresh and plump Gingerly Helen drew them from the shell shellby shellby shel by their muscular appendage unpleasantly unpleasantly antly anty suggestive of a corpulent worm wor Dip them in your butter Warren reminded herI herI her I I never like melted meled butter In a res res- res- res But she found it not In the least strong apparently the same came same grade that was served sered on the table Charge Chare enough here here but but they give you OU good god stuff approved Warren arren Mumford this man to I says sas goes market market mar mar- ket every morning moring himself himself buys buys the very best ver best Only half haf of her clams cams disposed of or Helen Heen pushed back her plate Not through Well Wel shove em over I can rn finish em all al right Warren aren you'll be b sick You dont don't realize how bow rich they are arc Nonsense good Iod fresh frh food like bike this t cant can't hurt you ou scooping them onto his plate Im Im not going to pass pas up anything any any- thing tin as good gool goO as these Every Ever shell shel emptied empted he next dispatched dispatched dispatched dis dis- dis- dis patched the asparagus also aso enriched with wih a creamy Hollandaise sauce Then Thence came ce the quartered tomatoes on crisp romaine romaine ro- ro maine well wel coated with French Fenc dressing dresing you sulking suking about Youre You're not eating anything at all al rm Im not sulking I told you OU I wasn't nor hungry not after that heavy dinner at past half pat halt l. l We come core here Thursday Its It's Is I's such a waste waste waste- Now weve we've heard herd all al that before If you weren't hungry hung I was was i wanted I some real and food ou you certainly certainty get It here her And pay py for It i. i too was Helens Helen's under under-h lelen's under her breath r-breath comment Wh when she sho glimpsed the total of the check chec Usually food too had a effect upon Warren Waren He lie Ie was never so amiable as a after ater a hearty meal meal Ids his after dinn dinner din- din n ncr ner mood moo helen always termed teed it But occasionally he overate overate-nd overate and with dis- dis results Hardly Harly had they emerged Into the damp starless starles night when his scowling tle silence proclaimed that that his dinner had been too much Dear lets let's walk a few blocks The air will be good d f for wi r you maybe liT 8 y you can cank walk wale It off ca Wak Walk k what off irascibly l Why you ou ate so much much much-I I thought you felt a little indigestion Never felt better In my life Ufe But nut as they walked on his b gloomy raj- raj si silence si- si lence belied bled his words Any drug stores open around here ho he demanded suddenly I I hardly think GO co GO peering down the v balck wholly deserted street But weve we've some pepsin tablets at home Who o said sid anything about pepsin tablets tablets tab tab- lets explosively el Then as a rattling taxi swirled the tM corner cor cor- S ner ncr he raised his cane with wih a a brusque Hi there 11 Oh 01 we dont don't want a taxi the taxi tx-te tx the SU sub subWays subWay's suD 1 ways way's right here hee f r shut up up- and Now ow you get in there thrusting her Into the car As the tho taxi chugged on on Warren back into the corner stubbornly n maiD taming his silence until they thet morose moros drew dw up before his Ills doorway k Five seventy for tor the dinner and nd a adolar aj dollar dolar eighty for the taxi mentally col- col corn com ele ele- Helen Uele as they went up in the th a ot vator Seven fifty for the privilege li res res- overeating in a stuffy glaring noisy She was wa turning turing on the lights In th library when there came caine a crash of ot gla glasS S from the bathroom Just confounded bottes bot- bot one of th those so se ties tes growled Warren when she r to the door dor Youve Youve got this so sa cu full tun of rubbish you rubbish you cant can't find any anyWhere tin V Where in blazes are ae those those- thoe pepsin pepsi tablets tab tab- tab lets vW vial In ni nithe Right here finding the tho small smal the crowded medicine chest lo Now Warren Warran War War- water hot ran ren ren you'd better drink some and go right tight to bed As she brushed bed up the broken glasS and wiped up the fragrant frat hair tonia tonic the remains of oC a a new bottle botte Helen added that evenings evenIngs evenIng's even even- another dollar dolar and a a quarter Quater to tat lags Ing's ings s. s And it was was was' wasal all al the result of ae warre gastronomic greed Their simple ww whole gee saved 1 hl some home supper would have ha 0 attack sed 0 Of eight seventy five seventy five and an a churlish |