Show I Reflections of a Bachelor Girl III IIII I I Ry By Helen Rowland Girl Copyright 1916 by the Press Publishing Publishing Publishing Publish Publish- ing Co The rho New York Evening World orld Hold Bold on tight to your h heart art around the curves of or a summer f flirtation Dilation Of or course these IS a difference in husbands husbands- husbands but but ut after anCL all one mans man's chin is Just as rough as another's and andone andone andone one mans man's lies are arc just as smooth as another's S It doesn't matter whether or not you believe that you are aie the only woman that a man ever really loved the task of your life is to make malte HIM bel believe eve it dearie I Perhaps there Is nobody quite so fascinating fas fas- cinat to women as a man who is so modest or so homely that he feels it necessary to pay them a little devoted attention The rho average bridegroom can cheerfully cheerfully cheerfully cheer cheer- fully endure all the tortures of a modern modern modern mod mod- ern wedding except that pitying Poor simp expression on the faces of or all his bachelor friends Give a man enough rope and hell he'll get getso et etso so tied up with some other woman that hell he'll soon be coming around and begging begging beg beg- ging you to cut the knot and put him himon I on a lifelong leash Incompatibility of temper is what I a man calls it when his wife begins to get et around the eyes and he has a touch of ot enlargement of the vanity I I Better be a homely mans man's jollier than thana I a handsome mans man's jailer I Chins were thought of f many cen den centuries centuries I tunes ago and have haie been greatly in vogue ever since In the olden da days s 's chins chin were merely used as a garage for whiskers but now chins are aie worn naked There Ther are two kinds of chins sloping and loose Joose The loose variety sanely are very vely annoying to their husbands who have to listen to them vibrating President Ex-President Taft Tact was a powerful factor factor factor fac fac- tor In making chins chins' popular He was wasa a gent and got wholesale wholesale wholesale whole whole- sale rates from the barbers ers I II I Sorting locomotives calls for great I muscular talent A locomotive sorter I puts the big locomotives on one side and places the small locomotives o OH Ou I the other Great care must be taken that debutante locomotives do not get I mixed with old wrinkled locomotives A locomotive sorter must pay for all aU locomotives which slip from his hand and dash themselves to pieces on the carpet Alas A man never can be happy In a love affair If he Is not suffering from nervous prostration for fear that thata a girl may not have him he is always suffering from heart disease for or fear that she may get him Alwa Always s turn the other cheek check in a lovers' lovers quarrel quarrel but but dont don't turn all the way round so that a man can stick sUck stickpins stickpins pins In your back Ah me If a woman could only have hae two husbands one husbands one to pay her bills I and one to pay her compliments one oneto oneto to take her seriously and one to take I her to tango teas one to support her herI herfor herfor I for life and one to make life supportable support- support able |