Show n I Daily Short Shop Fiction on Story HER LAST MATCH By ALFRED CLAY OLAY Copyright 1015 b by bathe the McClure Newspaper News News- paper Syndicate j I It was mas said laid of 0 Aunt Mary Baker of Wellsville shortly b before Coro sho she died at a 11 l. l rood ool old age that sho she had haa made moro more I matrimonial al 1 matches than any women wom wont en eD in the state combined 1 i She was only 35 5 years CA of oC ago age when 1 her husband died and In instead l ld d of at looking for tor a L year and then marrying again which sho she could h have done derne shu she said to herself No 0 no There lher ix I 1 work ark to be done mc j and my rills lon ton shall shan bo be to do It Did ehn ho mein that sho ho was going Into inlo the cau cause causo o ot of temperance That rhal she sho was 11 going to smash show windows and s set t t amass houses In n tho the cause causo of ot woman Womans Woman's B rights That she eho was as going to work worl upa up upa a taste for tor mutton Instead of or missionary In the cannibal Islands That she sho was as asI i I tOlna In to furnish a hundred buck saws aWS 1 and and a like number of or and coax crox the tramps of America to take taka of off their coats coat and aDd get up a a. sweat ri i Nothing of tho the sort Sho She wasn't even evento to to o a turkey dinner to poor Eln families Ufe flee and give 11 half of them a 0 colic collo from m o o overeating creating Aunt Marys Mary's mission lon was to bo be the 11 I 1 bringing together of loving hearts hearth and ands andr s r S tand stand by them until imUl a a minister had made madeS made t one 11 heart rt out of or the two Tho The he hearts I y wouldn't be loving hearts exactly until brought face to face faco aa as It were They Thc I would first be lonely and discouraged L hell hea hearts rt She didn't propose a to meddle with mth tho the J males malee und females who Rood too 1 a 11 fair chance 11 4 with their natural attractions but to 1 search out tho those on whom nature had 1 vented rented her spite b by giving them homely tl 1 race faces lop shoulders protruding teeth I bowlegs and other handicaps s It was wag not it only a merciful mission but a glorious J one Aunt Mary wa was waa called home at tho ho age afe J 0 of 1 72 r and tho number of matches she ii 1 had arranged since Ince she ehe took up tho the bus bus- busness I ness averaged a two twos per year eAr Sho She liedwith lived lied with relatives who ho found no fault with her whim and she sho ho drove dro about the country country country coun coun- I try with an nn old horse hort e and buggy lookin look look- In ing for de despairing hearts heart Many Ian n ri widow would have been glad lad of her assistance Istance I t but she he would not give Q It When hen she sho had hac heard d of a homely old maid living from five e to t twenty miles awa away Aunt I Mary would drive to the tho address and In In- In herself I 1 have have como coma to arrange a a. marriage for jo you I But I am so o homely that no man e ever er r I oven even walked 1 home from prayer meetIng meeting meet meet- ing with me me might be bo the reply J Yes Tes you are very er very ery home homely but I hope hop to find a a. husband for you He Hey Hes y s TV will III bo be aa as homely homel as you ou aro are but you jou ou 1 must mutt expect that Hor Homely l men and women make the best husbands and wives Rives You Tou look to m me to be a good hearted om 1 woman n. n i They say fay I am am i f Are you ou quick tem tempered red 0 I i No Xo Good a at t hou housework nork e I am told eo so How Hon about romance d i v Ive got sot over o expecting a a. prince to t iS come along t And the Ule age Is about 25 About that But this Is making a a bust busi n ness s of or getting married Isn't It IU My r dear r replied Aunt Mary J Jf you OU OUi i were only IS U. U you ou would fall In love lo with fc a young youns man because J he wore a 1 cute necktie A youth of 20 would t fall fal In n love lore with with you OU because you OU san c nt alto To j make mak eke a sensible marriage you must minIe min min- Blo Clo Ie business with U at It-at at least enough b to know how the first months month's rent Is Is- Isto to be paid But who le it the man man would be Baked asked J I I 1 don dont don't t kno know yet et but I shall find one ono for or you jou ou 1 JAnd And good Aunt Aut Mary Ian would go driving I about th the country 8 askin asking Do Do you hap hap- I r pen n to know of or a a a. homey homely widower or old Ii b bach ch 1 How homely must he be ber iJ f Well Wen homely enough to scare a a. cow i i out u rot or the tho road It If he Isn't so eo very ery homer homely home home- r ly Y in the face then he ho must have bowlegs bowleS'S A S and b be humpbacked 1 And sho would hear of ot a man that I might till nil the bill an and she sho trall him down and talk to him and nd It generally s ended In a marriage It was said ald that l J ehe she had haCI only thrpo o fa failures lures In all those years tar and one of or them because an old S maid fell feU Into Inlo a well wen and froze Croze to death M I At length Aunt Mary Ian set net out to make is i h her r last lut match She didn't know that It 1 was ices to be her last but she realized d that she he had grown old Sho She h had hd d run across an old year old that for homeliness s i i. i beat all who had gone before She took at a a. sensible view of or the tho situation however howe r. r t J I 1 With my homely tae face I could not cx- cx t I i ex- ex expect pert a man to marr marry me unless be bo wanted i to exhibit me as 16 a side show frea freak k the I maid admitted j. j II Th Then n you are arc of or your looks I 1 M t When I can cnn drive e the pigs out of or tile the J garden b bv by mere merely showing my face at a ii i broken window pane jane hadn't I 1 ought to be f aware 11 tt But It Isn't the handsomest meo that makes homo home tho the happiest Nature l gives Sl e II every ery n roan man n and woman oman a feeling that they want ant a L home hom Even tho the birds blyde ba have bave e tha that t tI I feeling feeling n a home homely bird aa as well as a handsome handsome hand hand- some one Some Som man mangy Is 18 waiting for Cor you to help make a home Then hed he'd better hurry huro up UI before the j F Jud Judgment ment day arrives e I laughed laus-hed tho the old r en maid Id I v As 3 Aunt Mary fa had hod about r resolved that thIs should be her last bet case cane and as no her eyes eres told h her r that this was wall tho the homeliest t J woman In Sri the United States H 9 tes her pride as ID a mat matchmaker was wall aroused She had 3 heard of or an extraordinarily homely man Inan j fifty miles away and started to drive 1 there When hen twenty miles from Crom home she sheI he j I m met a a. man In a buggy and aDd he ho called ou out to her r Hello Aunt Mary Mary-I I u I was bound for tor I your house bouse i Wanted to see me mei eh oh Z I I did and do Two years ears ago apo I mar mar- clod a girl Irl for her good look She Sho didn't know aa as much aa as n a cat about housework housework and O she W was wan If bad tempered and lazy lazy In Tn s six eb x months she else eloped with a drum drum- mer rr nd nd you Olt Pursued them and kill killed I him him queried Aunt Mar Mars Mars' I 1 er never h heard tha that t I 1 did It If I l had J pursued It w would have havo ve been to lo thank thank them both I 1 ap for Cor applied a B. divorce orce instead In- In stead d and got It And jAnd now you ou W want nt another wife I 1 t i Yes YeB c but not a good looking one I S t dont don't t want ant her even en plain looking In Inde In- In de deed d d. d I 1 want her homely My L h mission as you OU know has been to bring two lomel homely people together tos buta but but but- It a I 1 Want you ou t to make an exceptIon In M m my case I Iam am in a farmer Carmer and live I at tho the crossing crossing of or two prominent highways highway I There Theres ere s s not an hour In jn the day that a tin n chicken buyer or agent of or I some ome sort or other Is not calling to chin with the wife 1 know that f V V MV the one w who I r ran n away with the drummer had sixteen sixteen orr offers rs to elope before he ho came caine alon along n i And you ou want a wife that wl will score ow everybody e away i hats It I 1 e 1 1 I 1 ha have haon on on hand and ready for I immediate delivery an nn old maid that thai I will Ither delight heart your or scare you 01 out or of the county I 1 have av seen tho the fn t In the e land an and she takes the I. I nIl medal over I I all r IJa M she lost a II leg or au arm o. o t Good tempered 1 A 1 homely woman 1 int dably Is b. Know Inow how holi to bake hake beans 1 1 am sure eh the sho ls is a good 00 1 houseS house- house S j keeper U Ite pcr i 1 i One more mor Question said Bald tho the man mart I Does Doos eho she snore I will guarantee that she ehe docs does I I He hie then told Aunt Mary laO all she wanted I to Know and repeat to the other party and a date was arranged 1 for lor the tho meet meet- L tn tag ing I IR II I R Remember It If sho she Isn't mighty home I ly 13 Its It's no marriage el I warned tho the man as they parted You'll have to go so to Africa to find finda findL a L homelier one laughed laus-hed Aunt Mary Ian The date date- came camo for tho the meeting Theman The Tho Theman Thoman man man was on time Aunt Mary was there theio thereto to make tho the Introduction Introduction- The Tho couple couplet t shook hands and then stool stood back hack and looked at each other A shade of disa disappointment disappointment dis dis- a appointment settled on each face fare Aunt Mary Mary was quick to observe it It Well Isn't sho she h homely enough 7 Why h she's a L good looking woman was the reply You led me to be be- lioce e that eho she was waa a trl fright ht to see eec And she sho led mo me to believe bellevo that t o were a L fine looking man I added the tho theold old maid Aunt Mary ary sat eat down from tho the weakness weakness weak weak- ness fleas of her knees She he had never met such uch before four a H case caso or 01 utes wont went past and then than sho she Joos loosened a bit of ot pink ribbon pinned to to a curtain curtain curtain cur cur- tain and held it up the color Ore Green Oreen en was a th the prompt reply of oC one ono Blue was pro promptly zapped replied b by th tho c other Aunt Mary diary was M saved veil They were color blind 11 Well W I did cUd w want nt a fine looking husband hut hue band said the tho old maid but butt the they say a man with Ith a face Cace like a squash 11 Is always a n good man And nd I 1 didn't want another mother handsome handsom e wife but hut Im I'm no kicker added the Than I 11 ll get a shotgun and a bulldog and I I J Iguess guess we can l keep tho the fellers away They had the thing t turned about bu but t the they married and have lived very hap td Ally But the husband wonders now an and d I then why oven a Il chic chicken eb buyer never ne r calls at the tho house |