Show Maxwells Maxwell's isa a a aily Particles of Patter Patter So o many readers have asked l to give a dissertation on love 1 j the that spinster Im I'm Imre ure re most of 9 i 1 lem em m thought y hey y would itch me inc out L bounds and nd reath This j jine ice ine me th they e y 1 ought we ill s stump t u m p ie ie synthetic l d Id blimp They E b bly thought thought hat liat love to t. t be beast beis' beis ej would is' is m u c h Greek as dif dif- A cal cal- Elsa Maxwell laxwell c ell lus us But they were wrong Love is 15 not Greek Gree girls if anything its it's French the the language of troubadours troubadours trou trou- badoura And md romance WeIl WelI this the love expert may have a tiring ring g o ot Oscar Levant's ignorance Mee ance asce she he he might have on hand formula or two from higher mathematics she may my even have turned a page or two of th the Kama Sutra when no one at looking looking at least so reason reason rea rea- son ion some gome of the most tolerant of the readers But as for love Oh no she he couldn't pass her IQ 1 kindergarten n for lovebirds I Ii l beg leg to acknowledge half of the tle soft impeachment which half alf I prefer not to say say say-at at least for the moment Meanwhile Id I'd like Hire to o juggle for your edification edification tion a a. jigger or two of the la last t jaundiced jaundiced words on the subject l Perhaps the sagest thing that 1 na a ever ver been said about love loves jaa s whipped up by that wise old bachelor Mr Samuel Butler of the way of all flesh To live said Butler is like to love love all all reason is against it l all aU ll healthy instincts for it ITo b be perfectly bald about it t to w be e in n love is to be a prisoner oner a Certain Certain wiseacres have built builta it hii a up into a sound piece of sog so- so g l philosophy P Take for exe ex- ex e that excellent couplet of liL U Parkers Parker's ro be the things Id I'd been beter bet- bet P er without Love ve curiosity freckles and doubt there is that most trenchant enchant saying Love like Wine t lir g while the the sparkle lasts Iia Fiat a when n it stands too long Ii Bas as but ut one remedy remedy- another bottle jt's s a a. curi curious thing but men and and- women will die for love much more readily than they will kill for hate And though true love is the hardest thing in the world to get its it's the easiest easiest iest lest thing in iou the world to lose And but thou love me said Juliet let them find me here My life were letter better ended by their hate than death prorogued prorogued prorogued pro pro- wanting of thy love The only real only real democrat in the world is Eros the god of love After the war Id I'd live to see this country governed by President Eros For he can make a beggar beggar beggar beg beg- gar out of a king by the glance of an eye and the touch of a aland hand land he can turn a querulous palsied queen into a demure dimpling dairy maid Didn't Eros make King Edward Edward Edward Ed Ed- ward VIII put his crown in n moth balls abandon his uniforms and the greatest surviving surviving surviving ing empire all aU to take his pipe and dog and marry Mrs Simpson Simp Simp- son Didn't Eros Eros' make King Carol swap his crown crownS for a sombrero and live the life of a simple Mexican hombre all for Madame Lupescu Didn't he make Unity Mitford shoot herself rather than give up her beloved boy friend Ad If this blond buxom lymphatic Nordic norn had only fired a fus fusillade at the frightened fuehrer instead of her useless self this jade would have gone down in history as another Joan of Arc Are or Charlotte Corday And now a confession Im I'm madly in love And the man of my choice is none other than the juggler of billiard balls baIls and juke boxes a man who can stagger into bed wearing a felt topper a Prince Albert coat and spats a man roan with the kind of a nose t that at would have to be blacked out in an air raid Im I'm Imin Imin Imin in love my friends with Mr W. W C. C Fields In celebration of my new-found new attachment for this veteran of the tIle red proboscis I knocked out the following ditty They've rationed our sugar our gas and ana our shirts They've clamped down on petting petting petting pet pet- ting to ration our flirts They limit our nighties they pass on all fashion But een Leon the Lion can canNOT canNOT canNOT NOT ration passion Press Alliance Inc mc |